Dolphin uprising

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Dolphin Uprising
Date: 2007-2009
Place: American Coast, Persian Gulf, Oceans, Among others.
Outcome: Human Victory
Dolphins Humans
Political affiliation
Fascist Varied
George W. Bush † Josh Peck †
2,225,000 2,000,000
3,458,983 God damned Nazi-Dolphins 857,391 Marmots
1,251,213 Beavers
1,107,312 Humans

The Dolphin uprising was a deadly war between the Dolphins and the Humans. The war lasted from 2008 to 2009 and ended in a Human victory. While the Humans won the war, it was not a total victory as Dolphin leader(The King Dolphin.) George W. Bush sliped away to his very secret ocean hideout. The war was deadly, as a total of 4,317,587 beings died as a result of the two year war. Oddly enough, they were all Canadians.

edit The Uprising


A fisherman is attacked in a surprise ambush.

The war started as a result among other things, of the perceived declining quality of snacks(fish)at Sea World. The war began on February 12th. 2007 after a pod of Dolphins bombed and sunk the HMS Titanic 2 on its maiden voyage. Over One Thousand Humans were killed in the attack, and within days all the nations of the world had declared war on the Dolphin menace. After a week of war American and British ships had suffered heavy losses(Approx. 3,000 killed.) to Dolphin attacks. Although very successful, the Dolphin attacks were uncoordinated. American President George W. Bush(Most world leaders are in fact Dolphins.) was appointed leader of the Dolphins, this was for three reasons. One: Bush was very popular among humans and could win sympathy among the human populace. Two: He had connections. Three: He knew a human when he saw one.

edit Josh Peck

After the completely illogical revelation that all the worlds leaders were dolphins, all the citizens of the world(or at least everyone with a Myspace page.) voted on who would lead the world to victory over the Dolphin menace. Relatively unknown actor Josh Peck received the most votes barely beating out Dale Earnhardt Jr. and Tom Hanks. Many all over the world were stunned by such an illogical decision. Certainly a politician would do a better job? The common reply to this treason was that to win the war out of the box decisions had to be made, and what better way to think out of the box than to put a little known actor into the position of running the planet?

edit The Early War



On March 3rd 2007 18,000 Dolphin troops landed on the New Brunswick coast(fully clad in protective armor to protect from the dry air). The invasion was successful at first as the Dolphins pushed thirty miles into Canadian territory, before being beaten back by rabid beavers (there are no people in Canada). The Beavers' victory was costly however, as 20,713 beavers were killed for the loss of 1,800 Dolphins.

edit See Also

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