Derventio Heritage Village

Not Fred, Just another beardy!

“WTF! it's closed already?.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Derventio Heritage Village

“The Derventio Heritage Village has Derbyshire's biggest collection of beards. Please take one.”

~ Tourguide on Derventio Heritage Village

The Derventio Heritage Village is located on the Racecourse Recreational Grounds, Chaddesden, Derby. Attractions include a Viking village, Celtic Roundhouse Kick and model Roman fork. The village was opened by Cllr Bookmaker in August 2006 to house Viking refugees from the Great Viking-Ninja War of 2005

Closed

Unable to believe their own stupidity the Derwent Community Project, Scandinavian Tourist Board and Cllr Bookmaker closed Derventio in February 2007 following unprecedented lack of interest in the village.

Origins - One Man's Dream

Derventio Heritage Village was the dream of local Chaddesden resident and Great Viking-Ninja War veteran Fred Mutley, He suggested the idea when residents were consulted by Derwent Community Team on how they would like to spend £42m in Government regeneration money. The local community requsted that the money was spent cleaning up the Racecourse Recreation grounds of spent hypodermic needles, invested in community medical centres for the promotion of teenage pregnancies, and improved recreational facilities for young people and chavs. However reason and sense prevailed and Fred was given £137bn of taxpayers money.

Controversy

Two years after being awarded £137bn Fred Mutley resigned from the project when it was discovered his Viking beard was in fact manufactured from sheep's wool and not the traditional Scandinavian Blue Anus Fur. "right", said Fred.

Derventio Heritage Village Has Closed

Derventio.org - Multimedia Experience

Derventio Heritage Village Has Closed (http://www.derventio.org/) is an exciting multimedia website built by students of Da Vinci Community College (WTF, is that what it's really called these days?) using cutting edge technologies such as Microsofts Frontpage.

Exhibits

• Model of a Roman Fork, a halfsize replica or a Roman Fork.
• Celtic Roundhouse Kick, the only surviving copy of Jason Barrodale's unique karate move as seen in the film Karate Skid
• Genuine 1950's Viking Ambulance

Activities

Activities that regularly take place at Derventio include: corn grinding, spinning and weaving, bread baking, thatching, masticating, shrimping and shooting-up.

Cold War

Authentic Viking Ambulance

In an effort to make the village even more interesting a Cold War exhibit consisiting of some historically valuable rusty old 1950's army ambulances were installed abandoned in the car park.