Dennis Rodman
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“He got kicked off the Chicago Bulls after he had sex with the mascot, Nigga Gansta!”
~ Oscar Wilde on Dennis Rodman
Tragically, this picture has not been doctored.
Dennis Rodman is a former professional basketball player, wrestler, bride, lesbian, and general lunatic. He is a graduate of Frankfort Kentuckistan Community University. He is the founder, creator, chief visionary officer, head chef and CEO of Denny's restaurants. Dennis Rodman is often confused for Dennis.
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[edit] Basketball career
According to public records Rodman played 10 seasons in the NBA, though league analysts have been perpetually confused as to which teams he plays for. Two things are for sure: Rodman's ability to run on both unleaded and diesel fuel, and his mutant ability to change his hair to any color, made him a notorious player.
A couple of his best basketball buddies
- Michael Jordan
- Shaq
- David Robinson (kissed this one)
[edit] Wrestling career
After retiring from professional basketball, Rodman took up professional wrestling for a short while. There he joined the NWO and banged Vince McMahon doggy style. This cause Vince to later decide that he wanted to fake his death in a limousine crash. Sadly, his plot was ruined by Chris Benoit's death when he performed his most effective finishing maneuvers on his immediate family. But this is getting ahead of the story. Dennis Rodman wrestled for a while. End of story. Oh, and he also fucked Carmen Electra.
[edit] Film career
His first venture into Hollywood sees him starring alongside Jean-Claude Van Damme in an action movie directed by a John Woo-cum-Michael Bay wannabe, Double Team, as well as starring as the lead of the critically acclaimed movie adaptation of the classic children's game, Simon Says, with Dane Cook.
[edit] Marriages
Dennis Rodman is perhaps most famous for his frequent and outrageous marriages.
Rodman once exclaimed in front of eighty seven million people in a castle in western Switzerland:
'Citation Needed'
The people all took their clothes off, and Rodman sucked every single one off. It took at least eighty seven eons.
[edit] Other activities
Since retiring he has publicly stated that he is taking the time to find peace and relaxation.
