Gods

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Contents

[edit] Popular/Well Known/almighty/cool/invincible Gods

[edit] John Petrucci

No explanation needed

[edit] You

You is the beyond-god, the uncreated origin not only of every god of the universe, but also of all creators of every existing universe. It is not you, this entity's name is You. You's powers are every that can be had and those which are essentially impossible to be had. You's in the top of the hierarchy: You overwhelms everyone below and over in case someone edits this website. <<not recommended editting>>

[edit] Fred

Fred was the great god of the universe during the first few billion years. Other than creating the universe and everything in it, his achievments include inventing surfing, beach volleyball, the planet earth and ice cream. He is one of the few gods who will happily tell people the meaning of life, but no one has thought to ask him yet. He is currently on vacation in Bermuda, where he will remain for all eternity.

[edit] Urkki

Urkki, easily the best thing to happen in Sweden. He is the god of Homosexuality, he also introduced carrots to the vikings to persuade them to become homosexual themselves. This event ended in viking women dying of sex deprivation and the extiction of the the viking. Urrki is recognised by his huge, gay wang or "Mr. Bannana" which is usually found in an upright position.

[edit] Pie

A holy Pie of infinite fillings who lives in the depths of the colon, its prophet is the almighty JoJo. Its religon is Pastryanity. Its arch-enemy is Anti Pie. its brother is Hair Pie.

[edit] Anti Pie

An unholy Pie of uninfinite fillings who lives in the depths of the anti-colon, its prophet is the evil Anti JoJo. Its religon is Anti-Pastryanity. Its arch-enemy is Pie.

[edit] Tabby Fat

A huge, fat cat with no arms or legs who is known as Felis Emperor of Space. He rules over the Cheese but is second to the Holy Pie!

[edit] Ben Jackson

This God is the god of the universe itself, He rules the 20 empires of the Tri-Mestre Quondren. He rules over the planet of the wookies, which means he is the god of everything living. He now lives on the planet earth under the name Ben Jackson. Legends say his legs are home to creatures that kill anyone who disses him. He also has collected all the skulls on halo 2 and 3 and defeated the evil pea. He says greetings to you with his level infinite greetings.

[edit] Ben Jones

The god of eating dick-cheese and givving you homosexual nightmares. Often seen eating gorilla pubes.

[edit] Idon'tgiveadamn

This is the god that people pray to when they just want to feel secure and happy. He doesn't give a damn, hence the name, and just makes people feel like their immensely bad ideas are actually good ones. Some of the countless people who have fallen prey to this god's dilusions are George W. Bush, George Lucas, Peter Jackson, Bill Gates, The guy who made Naruto, and whoever came up with the idea for Starbucks. This god resides in the 192845803485th dimension in sub-area 3998237532B, because, for lack of a better reason, he didn't give a damn and just randomly chose a dimension to live in. Idon'tgiveadamn has a hobby of making people think that creating a really bad movie sequel off of an already bad movie/book/trilogy is a good idea. Hence, the birth of Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, and even video game series such as Final Fantasy. (Idon'tgiveadamn created the Final Fantasy games for the sole purpose of destroying your most valubale brane sells.)

[edit] God of Bullshit

The God of Bullshit lives atop Mount Platympus, a dormant bullshit volcano. At any time, the God of Bullshit can command the volcano to erupt bollocks all over his Audience. He is the patron deity of America's education system.

  • The God of Bullshit has enemies that are representable in a 5th dimensional graph.
  • The God of Bullshit bestowed himself with godly power in order to bestow himself with godly power. This is similar to the origin of the God of paradoxes.

[edit] ek$i sozluk

Real god. http://sozluk.sourtimes.org

= god of bullshit only doesn't know it yet

[edit] Hansi Kursh

Hansi Kursh, aka God of singing, was found in a small ditch recuing a baby from crusaders of Kittenolivia and epicly fought 4 infidels of before putting the baby safely down and shouting in an epic manner, thus destroying them. He is now referred as a god amongst men.

[edit] Yahweh

Yahweh, aka Jehovah, aka Elohim, aka JHVH-1, aka YHWH aka Pikachu is currently the most popular god in the world. Worshipped by both Jews, Christians (though Christians often just refer to Yahweh as God),and Muslims(though muslims refer to him as Allah, yeah it's the same guy) there are probably at least a billion people who consider Yahweh the one, true god. Yahwehists tend to disagree with each other about the exact nature of Yahweh, though, and end up fighting each other almost as much as they fight believers in other gods!

[edit] Kakashi

The Lord rule of Ninjas, Pedophilia, and you. Also Needs to Quit Shoving his fingers into Narutos ASS!!!!

[edit] Tico torres

Known as the "hitman", drummer for Bon Jovi , he is the best drummer of the history. I love you Tico!!

i hate your skin.

[edit] Allah

Allah

[edit] Shema Yisrael Adonai Elohaynu Adonai Echad

This god was set up on Mount Olympus as a practical joke against the Israelites. He was originally named Semenya Caster, but got promoted when some laughing gods on the mount decided it was time for a God of Monotheism. He was later joined on Mount Olympus by a Goddess named Laa Ilāha Illa Allāh. Suffice it to say that Allah/God was not pleased.

[edit] Laa Ilaha Illa Allah

The Greek goddess of monotheism. She was called forth by Zeus and Asherah as a fine example of an oxymoron, and while she wore a hijab in her early days, she is now nude most of the time. She was pretty notorious for shirking her job, but the Olympus establishment insisted she preach monotheism. She grudgingly complied. (Commented Zeus, "We don't mind if people claim we don't exist or only one of us does. Makes it easier to do our jobs sometimes.")

[edit] Buddha

Buddha isn't actually a god, though many Christians think that Buddhists worship the Buddha. In truth, though, they just think he's a really hoopy frood who knows where his towel is. There is some confusion about whether Buddha is a short, fat guy or a thin, constantly-meditating guy, or possibly an American musician, but nobody's really worried about it.

he won American Idol.

[edit] BUHHDA

BUHHDA is the second coming of Buddha, BUHHDA ate Buddha and became a god. BUHHDA is a long time rival of God and they share a mutual hatred of each other.BUHHDISTS are famed for their sexual techniques which are acquired via da vinci code secret messages that can be found in the Book of BUHHDA. BUHHDISM is commonly confused with asian take out places.

[edit] Bono

He's Irish. He's also Bono, and that affects the whole damn planet! Besides, Bono believing himself to be God has caused much confusion and now God believes himself to be Bono.

[edit] youtube

"You Tube" is a very popular saying. Used in a lot of everyday conversations like: John: 'Have you heard the song 'Trooper' by Iron Maiden? Joe: 'No, but I'll 'you tube' it'

[edit] Douglas Adams

Douglas Adams is God. Accept it.

[edit] Your Mom

No your physical mom is not a god(dess), but the proverbial your mom is. Also the act of copulation with her is a separate but related god too... but still Kyle' s Mom is the Prime Directive. Beam me up Kyle' s mom.

[edit] Me

Forget the statement about Douglas Adams! I'm God! Do what I say or go to Hell! I mean, come on, I am the leetxorz. That simple. Migration.

[edit] Google

It is very well known by now that Google is the one and only God. He has created the Earth, and, to prove it, Google made public for free use the software He uses to manage everything. You can download it at http://earth.google.com. He also bought YouTube.

[edit] Jimi Hendrix

One of the few gods to have been verified on film, Jimi Hendrix is the god of guitar players. Worship of Jimi tends to take the form of trying to play a guitar behind the worshipper's head, and doing long, strange versions of the Star Spangled Banner under the influence of marijuana.

[edit] Dick clark

Do we need any more info?

[edit] Samuel L. Jackson

Same as above.

[edit] Kratos, the legendary GOD OF WAR!!!

See Kratos, and God of War for more info.

[edit] Sephiroth

The only guy to kill Kratos, But how did Cloud beat him. 

                          THAT SUCKS

[edit] Superman

This is quite easy to figure, since Supes is practically indestructable (on Earth), and seems to clean up after everybody else ALL of the time. Superman also is exceedingly benevolent, which indicates his total indestructability (since without mortality, he has no fear, and since he has no fear, he has no anger, and since he has no anger, there is no reason for him to cause suffering). Now seen as somewhat quaint and un-interesting (unlike flawed anti-heroes such as Daredevil, Batman, or the Punisher), Supes still has a loyal following amongst the people.

[edit] Thor

Actual worship of Thor mostly stopped when the Vikings stopped conquering new lands, but Thor remains a very popular god to this day. He is popular enough to have his own line of comic books, which, frankly, beats out Yahweh, Allah, and Buddha in some measures of popularity. Worship of Thor consisted primarily of drinking large quantities of mead and beer, and singing loud, off-key versions of popular musical numbers. But we all know that Thor is really Daniel Jackson in an Asgard suit.

[edit] Oscar Wilde

A god only because of his many wise*cough* sayings, he simply is undefeatable when it comes to commentary. The rest, as they say, is history.

[edit] Godzilla

God to the mutant lizard/dinosaur realm, his worshippers are all hidden in their underground luxury apartments biding their time, until they can once reclaim the Earth.

[edit] Arceus

LLama God of all Pokemon and true creator of the universe. Most powerful being ever to exist. God's best friend and old rival. Your salvation.

[edit] Bill Gates

The god of business who has secret plans to buy the universe and become the ultimate god.

[edit] Dave

Dave is a god who uses the power of sheep shagging to feed his people. All so he is Welsh. Which he prefers to be interested in on a monday night, rather that watching jeremy clarkson bum a brick wall. :)

[edit] Rudyard Kipling

Generally known as the "bloody nice god, that Mr. Kipling", Rudyard Kipling's most distinct godly trait is that he prefers to write all of his own religious texts himself, as opposed to getting scribes to perform the task, or in Jimi Hendrix's case, play them. There are many variations to his texts, generally based on region. The most famous of his holy texts, "The Jungle Book" belongs to the Indian sects - one of his most prominent regions of worship, where he has well over 20,000,000 followers. Mr Kipling is a very generous god, and is continually seeking approval from the far corners of the Earth, by copntinually summoning offerings of snack-sized pies and slices. And, of course, he does make "exceedingly good cakes".

[edit] Gary Gygax

Also known as Satan to some sects of christianity, Gygax is the creator of the Darkness Spawn known as Dungeons and Dragons. Gygax had tried to conquer the planet with his organination TSR studios, but had had been beaten back by the righteous Crusade of 1392. An extremely powerful Overdeity, Gygax opposes Allah and other gods proposed by his prophets to be false. His evil is so great, he has been known to poison the hearts of certain victims, increasing their intelligence and imagination. The Unpardonable Sin according to certain sects of different religions.

[edit] Loki/Loke/Low-Key/Loge/Etc

He had his name changed many times, but finally settled on Loki Laufeyjarson. Unlike the other dieties, Loki knows how to take a joke. There are many other beings and organizations, etc, that are using Loki as a name, that the real Loki had used the last name of Laufeyjarson to distinguish himself from the rest. Loki is a shapeshifter, and likes to impersonate the other deities and confuse their followers. He once posed as Jesus and told Christians to start the Crusades and the Inquisition and the Salem Witch Trials. He would shift to appear to look like Buddah, but everyone sees Buddha as a different person anyway, and Loki could not decide to be fat, thin, tall, short, or whatever and gave up trying to impersonate Buddah. Not to be confused with Loki, no relation, no really. His impression of Thor and other Norse gods, brought down the house at Ragnarok. He is known to be a founder of Iceland, Finland, and other nations of northern Europe, because he changed shape to appear as every one of those founders of those nations. It was Loki's idea to create the Vikings, which lead to the Pirates. In any case if you are talking to someone as annoying and off the wall like Orion Blastar, chances are it just might be Loki shapeshifting again. The most popular of this incarnation is Uber-Loki, but that and the rest of this description of Loki are just myths, the real deal is named Loke and all others are works of fiction, myths, lies, and Kitten Huffing. Loke is the real Loki, all the rest are just imitators. Will the real Loke please stand up, please stand up, please stand up? We're going have a problem here!

[edit] Shatner

By some William Shatner is seen as only a minor diety. Followers of the great Shatner are known to the rest of the world as Trekkies or "bitches".


[edit] Christopher Walken

Think about it, CHRISTopher Walken. He is god of all that is good, like cowbells. See Walkentology.

[edit] Tina Fey

Come on guys, just think about it. Who hasn't bowed down to those sexy glasses of hers, and her ultimate power of course.

[edit] Sean Bean

Anyone who's accent is so powerful that it can give women orgasms miles away, is a god in my books.

[edit] iGod

Apple, created their own personal God for people named the iGod. It allows people to create their own iBible to do or say whatever they want it to do or say. It has met much critisim from other gods, but it remains popular with the youth (hey the simpsons have a point).

[edit] Small Gods

These gods are unbelieved in, and consequently are invisible spirits. Nobody knows how they are created nor how they die, but they are desperate to have believers, to the point where they will drive people mad, haunting them all day long. To get rid of them, you may have to consult

[edit] 4kids

The god of everything. Nothing in any universe can touch it. It has already taken SEGA, Micrsoft, and Youtube. Soon, it's pinata men and rubber pirates will come and kill us all. I am 4kids, by the way...

[edit] Jimsonweed

The God of all of the drugs and marijuana ever made. This God was much believed in around the '60s. He is known for his dreadlocks, and for being a plant with a human appearance. He killed Bob Marley when he accidentally became a mutated plant and his scent was way to strong. He is me, too...

[edit] WRDMBWOURN

WRDMBWOURN stands for Whatever Random Deity May Be Watching Over Us Right Now. He is a very confusing god to worship, as praying to him could result in praying to one or more of the gods listed both above and below. WRDMBWOURN is an actual deity, and simply set up so that any prayers he received would simply be sent to another deity at random. Thus, you never now exactly what god is going to get your prayer.

[edit] Freddie Mercury

Maybe one of the most mysterious among all gods, Freddie Mercury was commonly known as a rock star, hiding the original purpose of his existence: salvation through rock&roll. Mercurism has been an official religion since the 70’s. In those years, believers went to massive cults, called innocently “concerts”. In 1992, when Freddie mysteriously disappeared, mercurists were pushed to perform private cults, worshiping him with hours and hours of fandango (with Scaramouche, of course). After that event, many myths have been created. Mayor mercurists affirm they saw him ascending to a Bohemian parallel world. In fact, you can be persecuted for blasphemy and tortured by Beelzebub if you say in the presence of a mercurist that Freddie died of AIDS. Don’t ever dare… maybe there’s one behind you!

[edit] Mantorok

Mantorok lives in your basement and if you don't give him corpses to eat, he will kill with his tentecles. He has a lot of mouths but only uses one of them.

[edit] iClan

The iClan is a group of God like people who play the xbox

Xx19iGod91xX - Mark
Xx19iArKaNexX - Curtis
Xx19iGman92xX - Gaige
Xx19iLegend91xX - Swannie
Xx19iMerc92xX ( soon to be ) - Sasha

[edit] Haruhi Suzumiya

[edit] Chiyo-chichi

[edit] Killer Wooden Giraffes of Doom

Gods of everything, but especially smiting and asplosion.

[edit] David Hasslehoff

The god of chest hair, Hoff Christ is the most improtant God of them all. He is believed to have died under the hoofs of the KILLER WOODEN GIRAFFES OF DOOM

[edit] Privates of God

This is another form of worship where theists pray to privates of the Almighty. Hindus consider Dick of Shiva and Pussy of Some Godess as Holy. Its Believed that the Kaabah is the dick of the Islamic God Allah and the Black Stone, also known as Hijr-e-Aswad represnts the pussy of Allah. From this, many scholars have concluded Allah as the supreme Almighty for He is a Hemophrodite. The new God that falls in this category is Hank's Ass. Kissing of privates is considered Holy. The privates that are usually kissed are Hank's ass and Allah's pussy (Istalam)

For more on Hanks Ass http://www.jhuger.com/kisshank.php


[edit] Others

His Holiness Molech Thorp of Milladore, WI.

[edit] Trivia

[edit] Gods' nationality

All Gods originate from Asia the universe is created in the taste of Asia, hence a star tastes both sweet and sour, and black holes stretch people out into noodles, and space is in the shape of a big prawn cracker. Karl Marx allowed the Gods one wish to do with the creation of the universe.

[edit] See also

[edit] External links

ALLAH?? islam= kill for allah gets sex that is islam practise human sacrifcie follow a peediphile named muahmd who has sex with a 9 year old child and had sex witha dead body and you get to allah porno graphic heaven fact is what a atheist believes ( no god) will suffer under the hand of islam


Bellacus-god of masturbation,plesure,sexdesires and nasty sex............

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