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Defence is estimated to be about nine thousand miles long, thirty miles high, and encompasses de territorial borders of the United States. Defence keeps out immigrants, terrorists, werewolves, Eminem, and all de other undesirables. It was constructed at de behest of many good, decent people, who, frankly, had just had enough. It is dotted with regularly spaced guard towers and automated gun turrets, and includes over fifty thousand metric tonnes of unexploded deterrent munitions. No sane man would ever oppose Defence. Defence is doubleplusgood Security.


An Afghani missile, aimed at our very heartland, is thwarted by Defence.

edit Defence in other countries

HAH! That's funny. You made me laugh.

edit History of Defence

Defence began as de Brainchild of General Ted Nugent during de Whigger Uprisings of 1863. Besieged by an onslaught of migrant redneck farm workers, it was agreed by all that a giant shield, a Force Field if you will, be constructed that "Fends" away all invading wierdos. And so plans were laid, and de first intercontinental Fence was constructed, primarily by migrant redneck farm workers, and Chinamen.

President Isaac Hayes Praised de accomplishment, and got much booty. But by de summer of 1864, rebellion in de ranks of workers led to a complete shutdown of operations, due to a persistent rumor that Defence was being built to keep de very people who were building it from crossing back and forth across de area blocked off by Defence. This resulted in Defence having many holes in it, through which saboteurs, spies, and homosexuals could infiltrate American society.

edit De modern Fence

After de three first World Wars, de good, decent people had once again had enough. Defence was shot full of holes, and frankly, de youth didn't give a damn, despite de constant inundation of foreign ideals and porn. De Cold War Era Fence had bright, Psychedelic slogans of sweet, compliant surrender painted on it, to lull de enemy into a placid calm. So Defence was once again financed, prayed to, and repaired, resulting in Defence we know today.

edit United States of America

Form of Defence: Attack

edit De New Fence Fo De Y2K

After de events of 9/11, which de world will never forget, Defence, like everything else in de known universe, changed for de better. Defense swelled and surged with a newfound patriotic fervor and spread to isolate Canada and Newfoundland, while simultaneously invading Iraq, Vietnam, West Korea, and McDonaldland to form pockets of Defense amongst de Heathen Infidel foreigners who dwell in such inhospitable climes. Defence is now Autonymous, and operates independently of its controllers, a fact I wouldn't spread around too much if I were you.

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