Declension

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Revision as of 02:32, July 29, 2011 by Shabidoo (talk | contribs)

(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to: navigation, search
Declension

A declension is the relaxation felt by a person who realises that, yes, yes, infact I just might enjoy having this foreign object stuck into one of my orifices. It is the moment of letting go of ones presupposed ideas of physical contact and intimacy and relaxing any muscles which restrict entry and exit to the inner body cavities. In the opposite extreme, declensions are the thousands of suffixes one has to learn in order to be able to communicate with someone properly in various languages with hellish grammar.

edit Control

In societies in which both partners are free to express themselves sexually without inhibitions or gender roles in which one partner is expected to assume sexual roles which they may not wish to assume, some sexual partners may become obsessed with having an excessive amount of control over their bodies and what happens to them during sex. This can be a problem when one of the other partners enjoys randomly slapping the other person or shoving their entire foot into an orifice. What results is a conflict between one partners need to be in complete control over their own body and the other partners need to be spontaneous, random and dirty with their partner. When the result is negative, a large amount of animosity may result between the two partners, one feeling that they are being limited by the other partners excessive need to control everything that happens in the bedroom, and the other partner, horrified that their partner ejaculated all over their face without asking for explicit consent before hand. When the result is positive, one discovers the warm feeling of declension.

edit The warm feeling of declension

Just as the jizz smacks you in the face, or just when you find breast nipples smacking your face repeatedly and bruising your cheeks, one realizes that there is a universe of pleasures they never thought of nor expected to enjoy. Declension is the release of stress, giving into the unknown and excitement that derives from not knowing what will come next. It is that librarian who always expected a prototype partner and found herself falling in love with the pig she abhorred. The muscles that relax, the brain activity that calms down is a form of declension that is cosmically positive and thoroughly life changing.

edit Declensions and Conjugations

Declension1

Just when you have finally relaxed and learned to take in all of the raunchy surprises in life, you then get introduced to Ukrainian nouns. Thats right, your partner is from the Ukraine and if you want to get further in the relationship, expose yourself deeper to their lives and their families you'll have to learn a bit of Ukrainian. That means learning what a subject is, what an object is and what an instrumental noun clause just might mean. And on top of that you have to learn a good 400 suffixes to add on top of all those nouns just on the regular ones and a good 5,000 irregular forms just to have a basic conversation. Just when you though life was opening up and showing you new forms of wacky wild sexual thrills and intimate innovation, you now discover that, in fact, grammatical declensions, those Ukrainian nouns, is a cosmic nightmare that will prove to you just how much you are digging you new partner and all the wacky wild fun that comes along with knowing and getting to know them deeply. Very deeply.

edit The two declensions compared

On one hand you discover that you really love being cock slapped or coiffed on, but on the other hand if you repeat the feminine locative noun suffixes one more time you will vomit blood. While you enjoy having double D batteries gently wiggled up your anus, you forgot which gender a "car" is and which suffix to add if it is the possesive form of some one and would rather die than look that up in the declension table one more time. This will test your ability to know both the ying and yang that accompany everything in this life time and if you are really suited for your partner. There is no better time than the now to disover which is the case. Decline and then deline. To have declined and then declined. Declining then declining. Is is the eternal ballet of the soul opening and the mind destroying. Goodluck my friend.

edit See also

Personal tools
projects