International December 13: That Guy Day, Speak with a British Accent Day (UK)
10000 BC - Ug Nug Fug Nug is born, the famous musician responsible for the creation of the violin and other various sexually orentated musical instruments (ie the sexualin).
1067 - William the Conqueror invades the previously uninvaded British Aisles.
1732 - The Royal Opera House opens at Covent Garden, London. Screaming bitches heard from miles around, causes widespread riots.
1808 - Count Henrich von Flammenweffer invents Lava as a way of preventing skiers from taking over his favourite mountains in the winter.
1939 - Adolf Hitler invents oral sex and asks his enemies to blow him.
1940 - The French blow Adolf Hitler.
1942 - No people born on December the 13th, due to National No-Birthdays day. Experts attribute this phenomenon as having to do with a worldwide feeling of "I don't feel like getting any ass today" in mid March.
1992 - Bob like pie
1992 - Someone actually ate my shorts.
2002 - Fraidai the 13th, Satan renamed Hell to "Bloody Hell"
2003 - Former Iraqi President Saddam Hussein found hiding in a camel hole during Operation Bomb-The-Towel-Headed-Sand-Brigand, and captured.
2003 - SARS becomes the new iPod.
2005 - On the twelfth day of Christmas, My true love gave to me, A summons from the local JP...
2008 - Uncyclopedia was teleported into an alternate universe where this sentence did not exist. It was returned to normal just now.
2012 - Dyslexic people celebrate that the world didn't end with the Mayan calendar yesterday. Everyone else still nervous.
Today - That guy realizes that this is the only one about him even though it's his day and gets really really mad.