Daniel Jackson

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The Dark Lord Daniel Jackson

“One of the many lessons that one learns in prison is that buggary can chafe.”

~ Oscar Wilde

“Ahh! *Dies*”

~ Daniel Jackson on What he does constantly

HE'S FROM ANOTHER GALAXY!!!!!!!!!!!

Daniel Jackson is a real-life character in both the feature documentary Stargate and the subsequent television documentary Stargate SG-1. The role was played by James Spader in the feature documentary version but was played by himself in the documentary when it became aparant that it would be positive publicity for him, especially after his disastrous invasion of Gotham City lead him to be looked upon negitivly by the public eye. Jackson has PhDs in Archaeology, Anthropology and Philology anlong with having an innate dark power and also reasonably powerful magic abilities, gained through his time spent serving the Wizard Saruman the White. Untill recently, he was also known as a minor “Dark Lord” though this ended with his army’s defeat at the Battle of Gotham by Batman.

[edit] Biography

Born on July 8, 1965, Dr. Daniel Jackson is an only child and an orphan, as while young, he discovered that his innate Dark power could be strengthened if he fed on the hearts of family members. He quickly butchered and devoured his parents feeding upon their hearts, then subsequently hunting down all blood relations, his maternal grandfather and only living relative, Nick Ballard, survived by using his own good power to shield himself from Daniels searching, though over time and with age his powers failed and he was found by Jackson. The official whereabouts of Nick Ballard are currently that; “he lives on another planet with giant aliens” though this was a report by none other than Jackson himself, it is more likely that Jackson lead the doddering old man to someplace secluded and devoured him, then animated his corpse through Necromancy and placed him in the ranks of his Undead Guard. Officially, Daniel's parents, Melburn and Claire Jackson, also archaeologists, were crushed while supervising the placement of a piece of Egyptian art in the Metropolitan Museum of Art. His grandfather, however, being endowed with goodly powers, saw through this façade and quickly abandoned him after the funeral. Though placed in foster care, Jackson hunted his kith and kin relentlessly, with each killing and devouring bringing him more and more power, power which was enhanced by Saruman the White in his attempts to raise a general second only in power to himself.

Daniel is an archaeologist and due to his devouring of all blood relations (relations scattered over most of the known world) he can now speak more than twenty-three languages; on-screen, he has been shown speaking English, Ancient Egyptian, Spanish, Russian, Mandarin Chinese and German, as well as Goa'uld, Ancient, and Unas (which he claims to have decoded, but truthfully he consumed an Unas heart).

[edit] Stargate

At the beginning of the feature documentary “Stargate”, we see the stage were Daniel has fallen on hard times, as six month prior to this he was defeated by Batman, at the Battle of Gotham, and stripped of all but a small portion of his powers and is seeking a living doing lectures on ancient archaeology. He is only hampered in this by his complete lack of knowledge in the subject, but luckily he is a phenomenal blaggar and just makes it up as he goes along. We first see him speaking at an academic seminar, where he finds little acceptance of his theory that the Pyramids of Giza were much older than they were thought to be. Only one person, an aged woman named Catherine Langford, remains in the audience, and she offers him a job.

For Langford, Jackson uses his knowledge of ancient Egypt to open a device called the Stargate, by interpreting the cover-stones found with it, realizing that the symbols which everyone assumed were hieroglyphs were actually constellations. On the original mission through the Stargate to the planet Abydos, Daniel meets, tricks, then marries, a native woman, Sha'uri (meaning "she of the bountiful Busom").

[edit] Stargate SG-1

In the television series Stargate SG-1, Daniel's life changes when his wife is abducted; Daniel joins the Stargate team SG-1, to recover her, and after she dies, he remains a part of the team.

Over the course of the series, Daniel has been captured, infected with alien viruses, suffered the implantation of a dozen alien consciousnesses within him, has died and returned to life many times, used the highly addictive sarcophagus many times and experienced its withdrawal symptoms, and has ascended to a higher plane of existence twice. He has also suffered appendicitis, theses were of course all lies that Jackson demanded be put into the documentary as he felt the public would be more inclined to look upon him more positively.

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