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“Gangs are straight Blood.”
“We da best.”
The Crips as they are commonly called are an all male youth group for the criminally inclined who suffer from a birth defect that causes them to possess only a small portion of one of their testicles. This birth defect is known as illiteracy.
Crips was started in 1969 as a way to build the confidence of these unfortunate children by getting into groups of 20+ in turn allowing them to feel like they have a pair. While in these groups or gangs they perform acts that kids who possess the regular amount of testicles perform (For example, beating up kids half their size). The Crips can easily be recognized by their tendency to where a lot of blue which is thought to be a half-assed attempt at tricking society into thinking they are males.
The Early Days
The Crips were founded by George "Ray-ray" Washington and were originally called the Big Baby Avenues because they were always trying to copy adults which is common behavior for many little children (it is also speculated that the fact that the majority of the members being under 4 years old also contributed). As many of the members began Elementary School the Big Baby Avenues renamed themselves the Avenue Cribs. Now there is a lot of controversy over how they got the name "Crips" though it is commonly accepted that their lame attempt at walking like 'true gangstas' appeared as if they were mimicking crippled old men.
Robbie "Spookie" Williams is accepted as the co-founder of the Crips having started his own gang known as the Westside Crips. The Crips began to grow even more popular and grew to become the biggest gang in the entire USA. They outnumbered most other gangs and basically raped at CS. It was because of this that most of the non-crips gangs joined together in an alliance to try take back their cyber dignity as well as their e-turf which had been taken.
By the early 1970s most members of the Crips had began locking themselves up in their homes playing CS all day growing ever more violent, sometimes even yelling at whoever supplied them with food. During this time Washington and Williams basically tore up anyone who tried to disrespect their homies and by late 1971 the gang's notoriety had spread to every gaming forum on the internet.
It was in the 1980s that the Crips got into the heavy stuff. They began dealing in e-drugs, namely World of Warcraft and Runescape. They began selling game currency and items for real world money and even on occasion avoiding the filters!! At this point they were breaking every major gaming etiquette rule there was and from here it only got worse.
During the early 90s the Crips weren't as active as previous years. The world had changed and console games were set to rule. The Crips could no longer lock themselves away in their rooms, they had to venture out to electronics stores to purchase consoles, controllers, games and most importantly, the means to play online! The game of choice was Halo
Sadly the new ways were harder to adapt to then previously thought, so in the early years the Crips suffered heavy casualties, including their esteemed leader George "Ray-Ray" Washington. Washington died during the battle of Blood Gulch. He died of heart failure after going 13 days without sleeping living off energy drinks and corn chips. It was during '92 that the Crips finally started getting control back and slowly took over the Western, USA Halo server and became one of the most feared gangs in the entire world.
Crips on Crips
As the gang grew larger, more subsets began to be formed. This is when the inter-breeding began. The Crips wanted to build the perfect soldier. Someone who could switch between their two weapons in half a second and then back again, Someone who could get the head shot every time, someone who would be unstoppable, the perfect soldier. This was their dream and they sought it through selective breeding. They began mating members of each subset till they had an individual with all the positive characteristics they had to offer, then they would breed these individuals with each other. This however, failed.
The main reason for this failing, was because the majority of the members of each subset were cousins and the cross breeding resulted in horrible mutation which when bred out resulted in AIDS. The other problem with this Crips on Crips breeding was the fact that they were all male which made it impossible.
This didn't stop them as it became one of the Crips rituals, performed at all gang meetings (Leaders meeting with leaders for example).
This inter-breeding led to bitter rivalries between members. There 'love' for each other soon turned into violence. Much like the prison showers that they had all been subjected to (for hacking related crimes) they began to fight each other for the best 'mate'. In the late 90s war broke out all across the Halo universe. Crips members began trying to prove their manhood in order to impress their desired mates. They lost a lot of their members to stress related heart failures but also the aftermath of these wars was an outbreak of AIDS. This crippled the Crips leaving them vulnerable to attack from rivals. Most of the members fled and went underground while they built up their numbers until they eventually took back their rightful place as 'kings' of the universe in 2001.
There are many ways to identify a member of the Crips. Most of these are subtle mannerisms they have that are common throughout most members and the most obvious being their dress sense (or lack of).
Firstly is that they usually where A LOT of blue. This is as I have previously stated, to hide their disorder and to make them feel more masculine. There is also the fact that they where their pants low for easy access. The more senior members of a gang where them as low as possible to provide easy access for the junior members whose job it is to pleasure them.
Now there are some common mannerisms that can make identifying a member of the Crips easy. One of which is the C-Walk. This walk is to try convince people around them that there is something between their legs that is causing them to walk in a very uncomfortable manner. Another of these mannerims is that they always have their hand around their crotch. This is also to create the effect that there is something between there legs possibly in an attempt to frighten rival gang members.
Lately though, after 28 years of operation, the Crips have realised that their obvious links to their gang through their clothes and how they act attracts negative attention of police and the like.
There are hundreds over famous members with ties to the Crips. Here are but a few of the more well known ones:
- KFBling Waternelly (Australian Rapper)
- Henry Rollins
- Rowan Atkinson
- Genghis Khan
- Andrea Dworkin
- Scooby Doo
- Bob Saget
- Nicole Richie
- Mary-Kate Olsen (Ashley is a Blood)
- Ben Stiller
- Ronald McDonald
- |George Harrison
Cripples, Hopping and the C-Walk
Basically, while some of the members were a bit stiff from mating rituals numerous people mistook their odd walking for some kind of dance. This is in essence the birth of the C-walk, Cripples and Hopping. This also gave way to womans rights and homosexuality.