From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
CremationWiki or CreationWiki is a vile, contemptible site written by some dirty, greasy man from off the street named Ashcraft. We don't know who this weirdo is or where he came from, but he's clearly the most idiotic and hateful person out there, as he burns subjects such as Evolution on his filthy, greasy site. We don't know who brainwashed him, but it must have been that great pig Ken Ham. His incredibly dogmatic, narrowmindedness has driven him to disallow any evolutionists and liberals from editing his crap! He must be with the Mafia.
We really don't know where this crap came from, but not from a decent, civilized person, that's for sure. Here's what this filthy, greasy brainless person thinks: that God exists, and that He created everything in six literal days! WHAT THE CRAP!!!!! No intelligent person would ever, ever come up with such an idiotic conclusion to life. Every smart person knows that we all came from blobs of goop in a chemical soup...hey! That rhymes! Blobs of goop in a chemical soup! See how stupid smart you get when you take on the evolution worldview! Anyway, everyone knows that was where we came from.
Anyway, there's no reason at all to assume God exists. I mean, He should've ended all the vile suffering in the world and made it better, right? But He's not! Either he's the meanest, cruelest psychopath in the universe or He doesn't exists, which is far more likely. And there's really no evidence for Him either! These heretics claim that Intelligent Design is all around! LOL! There's no design anywhere! All around us is the evidence of absurd chaos that was obviously present when the universe came out of that primeval fireball, and it's still around! Even buildings and cars couldn't have been designed! They must've resulted from a lightning bolt striking a pile of crap.
And the worst thing is that they attack the Great Wikipedia! What the heck is with that??? Wikipedia's right! Everyone knows that. They're right about what they say about evolution, and God, and creationism (oops, cremationism) and conservatism. And this site is even more right! Trust us, as we know virtually nothing have been around since the Big Bang and we know exactly what happened and they have an eyewitness account. This CreationWiki is just Hitler's and Darth Vader's and Big Brother's attempt to take over the world again. It may be wishful thinking, but these idiots believe it! And they try to portray evolutionists as hotheaded, ignorant atheist terrorists which they are!
edit Lies and Falsehoods
CreationWiki consists mainly of hateful attacks against the courageous heroes of evolutionism and Allah. These attacks include:
- Darwin was misguided a vile Satanist who sold his soul to the Devil in return for his theory
- Satan is behind the Theory of Evolution and is working to take over the world (he doesn't exist either!)
- Liberal dimmercrats are vile, murdering scum when all they really are doing is to get true slavery to sin and falsehood freedom
- Muslims are vile heretics who worship a false god which is true
- The Bible is to be taken word-for-word or you will not understand what God is saying you will go straight to hell.
Just from these select few elements, you can easily see just how communist these liars are and how much they want this country to stop being a free land and everyone's minds to become enslaved! Creation is a lie and nothing else more.
Another thing is to bomb that crazy Creation Museum off the face of the globe. It's nothing but a hindrance to True Science™, and will keep people from being indoctrinated by lies being taken away from the Truth! Make sure you know!
edit Antievolutionist Agenda
CremationWiki is built by sinister fascists who wish to subjugate society with its vile truth that will keep the country intact lies and to control the minds of its citizens. They do this by brainwashing the public into believing in this bullcrap, and then trying to hide it from the government so they can slowly and silently and sinisterly take over the minds of everyone in the country and keep them under their control.
edit Infamous Goons of the Antievolutionist Agenda
- George Bush
- Ken Ham
- Russel Humphreys
- Big Brother
- Darth Hitler
- Louis Pasteur
- Eli Whitney
And many, many others! Be careful, though. They may be carefully disguised as "scientists" which they are, in order to cleverly and systematically subverse you into their fascist theory, but for starters you should not believe them if they say the word "God"! That immediately destroys their credibility, for God is all-powerful and created the universe does not exist and is a ridiculous product of some cave-man's de-evolved imagination! Don't believe them!