CreationWiki

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<div style="margin-left: 60px;">Those bastards at [[Wikipedia]] choose to not have an article about '''''{{PAGENAME}}'''''. Fortunately, we here at [[Uncyclopedia]] have somewhat different standards. </div></div>
 
<div style="margin-left: 60px;">Those bastards at [[Wikipedia]] choose to not have an article about '''''{{PAGENAME}}'''''. Fortunately, we here at [[Uncyclopedia]] have somewhat different standards. </div></div>
'''CreationWiki''' is a virtual [[Internets]] entity that any [[Southern Baptists|True Christian]]&trade; literal fundamentalist [[salvation|saved]] YEC [[creationism|creationist]] can edit, and wow it really shows. It serves as [[God]]'s final bulkwark against the unremitting [[evil]]ness of this depraved (i.e. fucked-up) world.
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'''CreationWiki''' is a virtual [[Internets]] entity that any [[Southern Baptists|True Christian]]&trade; literal fundamentalist [[salvation|saved]] YEC [[creationism|creationist]] can edit. It serves as [[God]]'s final bulkwark against the unremitting [[evil]]ness of this depraved world. It has all of the good, All-American knowledge you can rely on! Now contains 100% less fact!
   
 
CreationWiki is not to be confoosed with [[EvoWiki]], the notorious demonspawn/bastardchild of [[Wikipedia]], www.Talk-Orgies.org, and [[Richard Dawkins]] combined.
 
CreationWiki is not to be confoosed with [[EvoWiki]], the notorious demonspawn/bastardchild of [[Wikipedia]], www.Talk-Orgies.org, and [[Richard Dawkins]] combined.

Revision as of 20:11, April 28, 2007

Wikipedia-logo-en
Those bastards at Wikipedia choose to not have an article about CreationWiki. Fortunately, we here at Uncyclopedia have somewhat different standards.

CreationWiki is a virtual Internets entity that any True Christian™ literal fundamentalist saved YEC creationist can edit. It serves as God's final bulkwark against the unremitting evilness of this depraved world. It has all of the good, All-American knowledge you can rely on! Now contains 100% less fact!

CreationWiki is not to be confoosed with EvoWiki, the notorious demonspawn/bastardchild of Wikipedia, www.Talk-Orgies.org, and Richard Dawkins combined.

Built on a firm foundation of water

CreationWiki was founded by Dr Noah ben Lamech (a qualified expert on baraminology and hydroplate tectonics) during the intermediate aftermath of the World Wide Wetting Incident of 2525 BCE, partly as the result of a record breaking drinking binge gone horribly wrong. Noah, being the wisest man alive at the time, wasted no time in laying out the ground rules of honest integrity and free inquiry and scientifical research and precisely where you can shove them already.

CreationWiki: 4539 years young!

For thousands of years [NOTE: Not millions! - ed.], the wise and benevolent administrators of CreationWiki have operated just like Uncyclopedia in that they ceaselessly strive to cater to the public's lowest common denominators in terms of objective accuracy or something. It is also said by some people and weasels that CreationWiki possesses advanced mind-reading technology which allows them to divine the innermost secret beliefs of any potential contributor, which sure goes a long way towards pro-actively filtering out unwanted evolutionary shit.

Lover quarrels

Many people (including the aforementioned weasels) fervently believe that CreationWiki and EvoWiki are mortal enemies, but this is patently not unnecessarily untrue (or not). In all factuality, EvoWiki and CreationWiki share a deep-seated mutual understanding and wholesome respect, because the one simply could not exist without the other, much like a white man and a white woman bounded by the Holy Bonds of conventional white heterosexual marriage. Of course, this is a somewhat imperfect analogy, especially considering that intimate sexual activity between creationists and evolutionists is pretty much out of the question.

Virgin offspring

In 2005, CreationWiki underwent a long series of improbable mutations spawning a considerable number of derivative childlike Wikii via mitosis, most of which remain reasonably compatible with Ultimate Truth. These virgin offspring include but are not limited to:

BaraminWiki
A comprehensive alphabetical listing of all 17,576 possible created kinds.
HydroplateWiki
A fun-loving paradise where geologists (and geology) run amok.
UltimateTruthWiki
Contains nothing but innumerable hyperlinks to itself.
IntelligentDesignWiki
(indefinitely down for extensive maintenance).

External links to more Truthfulness

See also

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