Coolness
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
“In Russia, School is too cool for you!”
“I distance myself entirely from that last quote”
Coolness is the state, condition, or cucumber in which awe and admiration is earned from peers by one's deeds, sayings, and general sense of being. It cannot be obtained but can always be purchased. There are several factors that come into play when determining coolness:
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[edit] Cool People
People who are cool are generally referred to as "cool people" (not to be mistaken with "coal people", the politically correct term for coal miners). Cool people wear jeans. You can tell a cool person from an uncool person by the clothes they wear, the way they walk, the things they say or do in an everday social situation, or whether or not they are Canadian. And if they wear jeans. Cool people do not use the internet for anything other than instant messaging or emailing each other, or social sites such as MySpace or Facebook. Thus, only uncool people spend any amount of time on useless sites such as Uncyclopedia, making eveything you read here about coolness absolutely unfounded, and therefore, useless. However, if you believed the previous sentence, you are guillible and easily manipulated, two traits which are never found in cool people. If you smoke cigarettes, then you are cool. Please keep in mind that cool people wear jeans, but not all jeans-wearing people are cool. You know who you are. Some examples of cool people are The Jonas Brothers, Oprah, Professor Oak, any criminal, Optimus Prime, Hannah Montana, and all the cast members from High School Musical.Forgetall these barack obama is the coolest animal on this planet. He is cool headed to run AMERICA.
[edit] Coolness Facts
- You are not cool.
- The Devil made coolness.
- The Devil can give you more coolness (for your soul).
- If you are black, you are cool by default(unless you are Steve Urkel).
- Exposing yourself to freezing temperatures does not make you cool.
- It does give you hypothermia.
- Hypothermia is cool.
- As is Herpothermia
- Ian Bailey is much Cooler than You!
- If your still reading this stupid list, you're definitely not cool.
- Hypothermia is cooler than you.
- You wish you could be hypothermia.
- Diane is like amazingly cool.
- Ice cream is cold, not cool.
- Ingesting vast quantities of ice cream does not make you cool.
- If you have to ask, you'll never know. Go edit Uncyclopedia some more...
[edit] K00l
- 0#0#0# n00b 5r n0t (00# 4Pn 5 n3v5r w1## b $0 th3r 5 n00b #0#0#0#0#0# 1mm4 h4xx0rzz#3 $01$ $01$ $01$ $01$ $01$!
[edit] Coolness
If you're cool, ignore the above section.
[edit] Cool and Cold
I know, I know. The basics for this have already been covered in the coolness facts list. However, lots of you are still confused. I know. I'm watching you... Anyways, ice cream is cold. Snow is cold. Skating rinks are cold. Ice cream, snow, and skating rinks are not cool. If that still doesn't make sense, think of it this way. Hot is the opposite of cold. Hot is never the opposite of cool. Unpopular is the opposite of cool. Hot is the opposite of ugly. Read that? Got it? Good! Also to be cool you gotta play games like Warhammer and Warhammer online and Warhammer 40k and War hammer 40k dawn of war and Dungens and Hoes. k?. kai.
