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Columbia can refer to:

  • Space Shuttle Columbia, a sophisticated piece of machinery that was involuntarily converted into insurance dollars.
  • Colombia, the country where you can buy a drug mule for 17 cents - but watch out for death squads!
  • British Columbia, where both the drug mules and death squads have British accents.
  • Columbia, South Carolina, the capital of South Carolina
  • Colombia, the tree fort built by Christopher Columbus in 1461. Girls were not allowed in this fort. Sadly, due to poor construction, it exploded in low-earth orbit.
  • Your mom, if her name is Columbia.
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