City of Villains

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“I need a gun.”
~ Master Chief on futile attempts to take down Lord Recluse
“I hate Arachnos, damn things come all over my carpet floor!”
~ Oscar Wilde on wrong type of Arachnos
“Light up your foes to a thousand degrees. Warning, fire spreads!”
~ Plasmid Commentator on Fire Blast set
City of Villains
City of Villains
Game Box of villiany!
Developer(s) Cryptic: Across: 14 Footwear for cheeky dandies around Luxembourg (9)
Publisher(s) Guild Wars
Release date Been out for years
Genre MMORPG
Platform(s) PC
Rating 4.5/5
Would Johann Sebastian Bach play it? Why should you care?

City of Villains was the sister MMORPG computer game made by Cryptic: Across: 14. Footwear for cheeky dandies around Luxembourg (9) to accompany City of Heroes. The games are very much the same, except for a few minor changes that make the game more assholish and less about dandelions. New enemies were added, as well as new powers that generally make the villains more powerful than the heroes, but in the process making teaming up more difficult due to the average villain's tendency to stab allies in the back.

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For those without comedic tastes, the self-proclaimed experts at Wikipedia have an article about City of Villains.


edit Character Classes

Before the player can start their reign of jackassery, they must choose an Archetype. There are no speshul Archetypes in City of Villains, as there are no special villains. Warning: this article assumes that you have read the City of Heroes article.

edit Archetypes

edit Reckless Fool

These villains have taken a step too far and put their offensive set as their primary instead of as their secondary. Meatshields stare in disgust at these freaks of nature, which in the unholy process of rearranging their powersets, have become a lot stronger and more fun to play than themselves. This is one of the reasons many heroes turn to the path of "the asshole". However, the developers, in their sadistic glee, gave them an inherent power that forces them to fight constantly to keep their damage up, even when their Endurance runs low.

edit H3al0r

Like the heroic Healer, this Archetype claims to work with mysterious things called Buffs and Debuffs. Again, this is just rubbish. The H3al0r has a ranged set, and their subset remains a mystery. Some of them are said to contain heals but that is purely a rumor. This is main line that you may hear if you are a kinetic H3al0r "Give me sb plz!"

edit Gimp

These villains are like the Controller in the way that they are unnoticeable in combat, except they have taken an offensive secondary rather than a "Buff/Debuff" one(making them even less desirable for teams). As a result, the Gimp Archetype is like a cross between a Controller and a Debt Collector with a little bit of Reckless Fool thrown in.

edit Lazy Jerk

The Lazy Jerk Archetype was for a long time rumored to be the only villain Archetype in existence, as it was the only one anyone played. Even today, Lazy Jerks make up the girth of the asshole population. Their form of combat is to hire people to do the fighting for them while they sit and do nothing. This was an amazing idea, as not only did it allow the lazy person sitting at the desk to play computer games, it allowed them to be lazy within the game itself.

edit Squishy

The name says it all. These villains pack a cowardly punch but are squishy beyond belief. One well aimed hit can take any Squishy out. Squishies pride themselves on 1-on-1 PvP combat where they hide in the dark and strike while the enemy isn't watching. Just as well, since Squishies all seem to make costumes that look like typical ninjas.

edit Villain Epic Archetypes

The villain epic archetypes were meant to be the long delayed gift to the neglected villain population. Then, on a dark night, they were released. They were not durable enough to tank and not powerful enough to DPS. They lacked the precision skill of a Squishy and the support capability of the H3al0r. Can anybody love them?

edit Cheesey Tack-On *male and female editions*

The Cheesey Tack-On archetypes are archetypes made almost entirely up of recycled NPC animations. The few unique powers usually feature two dimensional graphics swirling pointlessly in the middle of a particle-effect induced puddle. Even more economic is the record number of auto powers featured in the Tack-On's subsets. These powers are needed if the player wants any chance of surviving, and feature no animation, much to the delight of the cheapskate developers. The saving grace of the Tack-On archetypes are their ability to choose a unique additional set once they reach a certain level. These sets contain even MORE recycled powers, and just enough crappy new ones to make the player formally announce "Bother this nonsense" and play a real archetype.

edit Power Sets

Villains get to choose from a variety of attacks and powers which range from roasting, shocking, stoning, icing or even shouting.



edit Regular Sets

Plant Control: Allows the villain to unleash their true power and become an evil, horticultural menace. They fight with nettles, blackjacks and occasionally cacti.

Dark Armor: In one of the powers the enemy sees something horrific and trembles, for example your mom. It is comprised entirely on toggles, so when you run out of endurance (which happens all to often) you are screwed.

Electrical Melee: This villain can have the power of eletricity, certain powers are included is carpet shock and charged armor, but that is electricity around the villain which in turn just shocks themselves.

Stone Melee: You get a hold of Shao Kahn's spare hammers. He is still looking for it you know...

Stone Armor: A useful set in the game, when you get Granite armor nothing effects you. You are resistant to everything including missiles, Oprah, Chuck Norris sidekicks, Leonidas and the 300 , Dev ban powers, homework, Emos, Wikipedia, and among others.

Assault Rifle: A cruelly ironic set for a villain, as most heroes pride themselves on learning how to resist bullets at an early level. Incidentally, the rifle mows through dozens of heroes at a once, leaving them with nothing to do except say "HAX".

Thermal Radiation: The masochistic nature of villains shines through, even when they try to heal. If a villain who takes this set is asked to heal, he goes ahead and burns them and wishes for the best. Needless to say, it doesn't turn out too well.

Sonic Attacks Allows you to shout at your foes. Every swear word in the book is included in this set, however the only damage you can hope to do is give them a burst eardrum.

Ice Control: Allows you to freeze your foes. Now what are you going to do with them? Uh-oh! He's thawing, what will you do? Freeze him again! notice the loop? Enjoy it.

Poison: A Lazy Jerk set that features some top of the line toxins brewed through Cheato induced gasses that broil in the Lazy Jerk's gut. Some even use this set to heal. There aren't many villains.

Super Reflexes: With this power you can dodge bullets like the Matrix, then it fails when you get shot in the leg.

Ninjitsu: You get to go to Ninja school.

Fire Armor: You set yourself on fire and make foes burn their fingers off whenever they touch you. However you wind up with 3rd degree burns all over you.

Ice Blast: Throws snowballs at the enemy making them frozen completely then you can proceed on throwing ice picks at them.

Dark Miasma: Allows the control of darkness and twilight. Made famous by the villain Ganondorf, the set has proven itself useful in that it eventually gives the user the ability to summon a dark being similar to a Gimp, but can actually keep themselves alive.

Thorny Assault: A Gimp set that is much like Spines in that it allows the usage of colorful Dots. Thorns has an inherent power that gives the Gimp characteristics of a Lone Warrior, making them rush into fights recklessly.

Invulnerability: A Reckless Fool set the gives you illusions of grandure. Recommended for wannabe debt collectors.

Super Strength: A way of making you think that you are super strong. However, these are just the short term effect of a plant known as weed. In this game, however, it is simply known as Rage. At the end of your rage you get tired because you are simply "blazed" which will wear off within 2 hours. Just keep staring at that box of cheetos, oooh the colours.

Martial Arts: Quite different from the City of Heroes "deth kicking" set. This set would make Chuck Norris shudder in disgust(if it were possible), as these kicks can only be performed effectively when nobody is watching.

Ninja Blade: A curved katana-like weapon. But it is most certainly not a Katana! Read the name! Ninja Blade!

edit Lazy Jerk Sets

As Lazy Jerk sets are some of the most complicated, the henchmen are detailed below.

Necromancy: This set is one that allows the most Emo and/or Goth Powers to be unleashed.

Zombies: Braindead corpses that have decided to walk again. Attacks include wildly flailing their arms and vomiting(which cause a lot of amount of damage for rotting flesh and this morning's breakfast).

Grave Knight: Lone Warriors that the Lazy Jerk has reanimated. These guys have a knack for following enemies around corners and into larger mobs(which, as it happens, is how they died the first time).

Lich: The Lich is what every Necromantic villain plays for. These smelly individuals are Gimps that like to think they are Squishies. As a result, they usually obliterate for a few seconds and then try to hide in plain view.

Robotics: This allows the villain to build robots. Not as popular as other sets, since the player has to build the robots from model kits instead of just buying them fully assembled.

Battle Drone: Outfitted for war, the Battle Drone proves useful until you get a lot of them.

Protector Bot: They currently prove useless, as they are still trying to find a set with an obvious heal in it. They like to call themselves Protectors as they stand in front of bullets(which doesn't work in this game. Any and all projectiles will curve around corners or go through walls if they have to).

Assault Bot: Not an AT-AT, but still enjoyable. The Assault Bot prides itself on looking good and having impressive attacks, but it's pretty much like a Debt Collector. It will rush into battle forgetting the fact that the Protector Bots still don't know how to heal and the Lazy Jerk is too lazy to use his own.

Ninjas: Allows for the command of a troop of Ninjas. Attacks feature mostly Roundhouse Kicks, Ninja Blades and the occasional fireball. All Ninja henchmem have probably flunked Ninja School which is why they are working for a Lazy Jerk.

Genin: Lightly equipped distractions whose only saving grace is their shurikens. But since the horrible incident involving a shuriken and the eye of a boy named Butters, the Genin will not use this neat ability very often.

Jounin: Slightly more advanced than the Genin however by no menas smarter the Jounin probably flunked or failed ninja school and missed the bit when they teach them how to properly assasin strike people. This results in a barrage of smoke bombs, a few arrows and only once they are certain they've caught the attention of everyone do they then run in for the kill while in plain sight.

Oni: A poor fellow that got lost on his way to Mardi Gras, this henchman enjoys lighting his farts in the way that he commands winds and fire.

Mercenaries: Allows for the purchase of hardened soldiers. Unfortunately, their attacks are very unimpressive and unappealing. Amazingly though, a medic is available and they can actually heal! Mercenary Lazy Jerks have gained the ability to drug up their soldiers with a special serum which makes them spray bullets in a less lucid way which actually kills more in the long run while giving them the ability to grow some balls and take a little damage.

Soldier: Armed with an assault rifle and sprays lead, little else.

Medic: Like the Soldier, but good. They are the most intelligent healers in the game, as they were the first to find a heal that is actually called a heal. Even mroe shocking is they actually know how to use it.

Spec Ops: Sounds good? Think again. They are well equipped, but moronic beyond belief. They are armed with sniper rifles which they attempt to use at point blank range. However these two agents got lost in the wrong game as they should have belonged in Splinter Cell, now having to work for a Lazy Jerk.

Commando(aka Rambo): Great firepower, but again unimpressive. These guys like to think they are tough, bringing Full Auto to bear against all enemies. Unfortunately, these guys will do everything wrong. As with all ranged AIs, these guys will attempt to use the Slug and Grenade Launcher powers at close range and wonder why their punches don't hit at range.

Thugs: The most popular Lazy Jerk set. They require little training and can take care of themselves.

Punks: Highly fragile fools while looking awesome with dual wield pistols, will probably die before they pull a shot off, and like Grave Knights, following enemies to their doom.

Arsonist: A summonable H3al0r that has become so frustrated trying to find a heal that they have given up and will ignore their own health. Even when they're bleeding heavily and have several fractured bones, they will gladly enage an enemy boss in fisticuffs.

Enforcer: This is why Thugs is the most appealing set to any Lazy Jerk. The Enforcer has Leadership powers to lead the team for the Lazy Jerk, allowing them to be even more lazy.

Bruiser: As a Reckless Fool, this guy is a magnet for aggression. He can take it, but he doesn't know what to do with it and will run back to the Lazy Jerk's side and give the aggro to him. This angers many Lazy Jerks, as they now have to do something about it.

Posse: The lazy Fool's panic button, or just when he feels that half a dozen henchmen is not enough to satisfy him. Posse are weak beyond measure but come in big crowds and even their own weapons *cough*

edit Patron Power Pools

Lord Recluse was super stoked when he came up with the awesome alliteration. There are 4 PPPs, one for each member of Lord Recluse's Panel of Pals.

Mace Mastery: Taught to a degree by Black Scorpion. What is left of Black Scorpion's brain will attempt to teach you how to use the simple Arachnos Mace that even level 2 Arachnos minions have mastered. He will proudly give you a badge and by the time you are ready for your fourth Mace ability, he gives up on you and gives you your very own minion to keep you quiet. If you are a Lazy Jerk he will teach you another move because he like to think of himself as a Lazy Jerk.

Mu Mastery: Taught by Scirocco, this set is full of abilities that manipulate Mu Lightning. It sounds cooler than it is(it is taught by a Squishy, after all). These abilities are quite repetitive, and just like Black Scorpion, Scirocco gets bored with his patrons by the time they arrive for their fourth ability and gives them a minion of their very own.

Leviathan Mastery: Mako doesn't like to talk to people. He made up the name so nobody would dare take it. But those that do will be treated to a variety of weird attacks that don't really suit any Emo Builds so no one really takes it in the long run.

Soul Mastery: The only Patron set that has any effort put into it. Ghost Widow is the most popular member of the Panel of Pals, so she has to keep a good name for herself. Her signature ability is Soul Storm, an awesome-looking technique that allows one to bind their foes with the souls of the people they've killed. However, she does not give this ability to Gimps because she wants to be the only effective Gimp.

edit Enemy Groups

As in Paragon City, there is no I in Evil Villain Group. There are a few Heroic Hero Groups you can fight, but I can't remember them right now. See City of Heroes for the original, brand-name, genuine groups that debuted before.

Arachnos: The main bad guys. They are villains gone commercial(like an Anti-Freedom Corps), placing their emblem on practically everything. Flags and banners, buildings and gadgets, capes and coffee mugs (I'm not kidding, look for yourself). The main goal of Arachnos remains unclear (despite their vie for dominance over wikipedia) but we are certain that Lord Recluse(the evil lord of everything) is in on it. In the Rogue Isles, Arachnos spends time gathering prisoners known as "Destined Ones" from the Ziggursky Prison of Brickstown, shipping them to Mercy Island and letting them run around for their amusement while they shoot at them. This is a very confusing group, with thousands of rules and laws. Many of them contradict another. eg, One can join Lord Recluse's "Panel of Pals" if they kill one of the existing ones, yet killing one of them is in fact illegal. War within Arachnos is permitted, nay, encouraged; yet if you come across an Arbiter, you're not allowed to fight them. Incidentally, it is not the best group to be with, as many of the Arachnoids of Warburg will tell you.

Longbow: The hero wannabes. They are known for spying in Grandville and making deals with Wyyvern(I wonder). These brave men and women have a thing with messing with super powered beings that they think they could kill which ends up the other way around. They are also famous for their combat lines like "Ok don't let them split us apart." They are hostile to almost everything except Wyyvern, and the funny thing is in some missions they kill each other.(I swear do the mission "Stop Biopulse from joining Longbow" for Doctor Creed.) Their plan to cleanse the Rogue Isles of villainy and make it safe for civilians, animals and wikipedians. They are pretty unsuccessful however, considering that during the break out they actually turned on the prison guards that are supposed to help them keep super-powered threats out of Grandville. But at this point, it would seem they should just try and take some of the existing villains out... or just deploy more longbow ballistas, they hurt like hell!

Infected: A group of protesters that were pro-recycled water went and drank some water from the city cesspool. Naturally, they all fell violently ill. But this didn't stop them, as a shining ray of hope appeared in the form of a person that partook of the water gaining superpowers. After this person gained the ability to spit out kidneys and urinate blood, the others became envious. Soon, all of the protesters and more were into this amazing water.

Snakes: Yuan-ti that have been misplaced in the game from Baldur's Gate and Neverwinter Nights. Some believe that in fact these are the original Hydra plans before the Hydra file became corrupted (see City of Heroes). They also have an annoying tendency to lisp and spit poison into your face.

Marcones: Rivals of the Family. They are just pissed that Marlon Brando sided with the "real" family and left these purple-kerchief-wearing gangsters to claim a really, really stupid name. Still, they are adept at running away at the first sight of trouble and have left many a villain cursing the fact they can't open a door and follow the fleeing Marcone inside a random building.

Shivans: Shivans are refugees from an unknown planet. They rode to earth on floating stones (that shredded a certain coastal town) and found lovely human skeletons to move into. They make for a hardworking asset to those who manage to employ a Shivan, as they fight quite well when forced to. They now live in ghettos in Bloody Bay, which now has the highest concentration of Shivans in the known universe.

Gold Brickers: These guys are low to mid level, and they love gold. With gold armor, gold jetpacks, gold laser beams and gold tampons. In fact, they love their gold so much that if you try to attack one of them, they'll shit a gold brick and fly away, leaving the gold brick for you to collect. Though there is no XP, infamy, shinies or lewt for these gold bricks, people LOVE them.

Hellions: These guys are really weak but their flaming skulls r really kool. They derived their name from Satan, brother of Dick Cheney. They were the inspiration for the hippies, goths, emos, and communists. They have this lame gun and try to kill you but it never works. Their next Targets are the remaining Beatles and George Bush. Their fire attack is weak 2. then u dont get XP becuz they suck.

edit The Rogue Isles

Where villains do their villainy. The Rogue Isles are vastly populated with colorfully dressed villains and heroes. The Rogue Isles are watched over by Lord Recluse. The evil lord of everything is put simply, not a pleasant guy, but everyone continues to behave by the book while he is around. With the help of his "Panel of Pals", Recluse rules the Rogue Isles with an iron fist.

The Rogue Isles are located somewhere off the coast of New England. Or not. No-one except the developers is really sure where the game is set.

edit Mercy Isle

A dingy place that has the highest concentration of villains in all of the Rogue Isles. This is because Lord Recluse ships prisoners in via helicopter on a regular basis from the prisons of Paragon City. Many villains don't actually accomplish anything. Many come to merely say something to a friend or try out a costume. Few come to actually play the game.

At this point, players have to choose who will be their first contact, and with this, whether or not they will work with the conglomorate Arachnos. They can choose between a trippy-dressed lady or a fat guy. Hmm, how hard did you have to think about that choice?

edit Port Oakes

If a villain makes it here, then they have made serious progress. For an MMORPG, City of Villains is actually quite linear. As a reward for making it to Port Oakes, the villain is given a newspaper. They hang onto this newspaper throughout their careers, as this newspaper has the magical ability to not only talk, but give missions and even cash rewards. Port Oakes is full of fantasy, players can even receive nefarious missions from a radio.

edit Cap Au Diable

Evidence that the City Council doesn't really think. The past of this zone is riddled with conflict. A giant demon spawned on the land, wreaked havoc and died leaving two diabolical horns sticking out of the ground and people go ahead and not only build a massive city on the war-torn land but start harvesting demonic energies and using it as a power source. Needless to say, the demon got right pissed and constantly attacks the city. A hippie group called The Luddites protest aggainst the PTS (power transport system) that transports power from the demonic hills to the city but become the main target of the demons that spawn as a side effect. Villains will only really visit this god-forsaken place for the Facemaker, which is a fancy word for tailor/plastic surgeon. It is also the home to the only university in the Rogue Isles "we villains are none too smart :"

edit Sharkhead Isle

The quarry and resource center of the Rogue Isles. This is where players can really start to beat up on the Scrapyarders. Apart from that, the zone really doesn't have much to offer apart from the step up in enemies and contacts. Like most zones, it doesn't have many people in it, so they made up for it by putting so many NPCs in it that the only Travel Power that can safely traverse it is fly, and even then you are likely to be shot down. It was also on this island that childhood buddies Captain Mako and the hero Scrapyard met for the first time in years. In the middle of a warm hug one of Mako's claws got caught on Scrapyard's skin and when Mako released he took Scrapyards skin and flesh with him. Spectators misinterpretted this as Mako eviscerating Scrapyard. It is said that the Ghost of Scrapyard appears some nights and goes back to the place where he was skinned. Of course every time he appears hundreds of mine-workers and road-workers gather around him to breath in the ectoplasmic fumes.

edit Nerva Archepelago

For the much needed fantasy touch. Up to now, villains of Magical Origin have had little to do if they are one of those creepy roleplayers. Now they have a few square miles of mystical/technological themed land. And what fun it is to splash about in the sea. At this point, players have realized that there is more EXP (mysterious energy that gives life) found in grinding PVP missions rather than real story arcs and as a result, are somewhere in the PVP zone Sirens Call.

edit St. Martial

CrabSpiderLongfang1

Move along civilian.

Welcome to St. Martial where the debt never stops and the Freakshow never die! Here is the list of our most popular shows under the entertainment spotlight! The entirity of the issues in St. Martial revolve around the shady dealings of one Johnie Sonata who apparently sold his soul for a golden voice. So now that the clawed monstrosities have come to claim the soul, he went and hid in the Golden Giza casino. So since then the demons "known as Whalers due to their harpoons" have gone and infested half the island murdering countless innocent civilians. All the while, Johny sits in his office twiddling his thumbs writing down his next number. Should a guest feel brave enough to leave the comfort of Golden Giza, it is recommended you check out the Carnival of Shadows. The entertainment never ends however should one give you a free mask and ask you to try it on remember this is not the end of Fable: lost chapters. Putting on this mask will not let you keep playing it will just sort of steal your soul and send it to the stagnating pit turning you into a mindless shell of a person that will probably end up playing an MMORPG. Uh Oh here comes a Crab Spider Longfang!

Crab Spider Longfang: Nothing to see here, move along civilian.

edit Grandville

the least important place in the game. I mean Lord Recluse, who is he? HAH! Well back to what I was saying - this place has no useful purposes excluding a talking TV that was imported from the Twilight Zone to Grandville, but other than that nothing else is useful here. I mean Lord Recluse and all his Panel of Pals are here; Is that important?... I think not! I mean who cares if there is a place called The Gutter and there is loads of 8 armed human/spider hybrids called Arachnoids? NOBODY! There is no reason to go to this place unless you want to go to Recluse's Victory, and the TV farming, and the Arbiters, and the Patrons, and the badge hunting, and the oh... nevermind!

edit PvP Zones

edit Bloody Bay

The place where a bunch of heroes and villains clash in combat of both the physical and verbal kind. The heat of combat rages on, but no matter how a villain combats a hero, the villain always seems to have the upper hand in combat. Just as (s)he is about to finish of the victim, the hero then glows like a purple sun after popping about one thousand three hundred and thirty one purple inspirations; making the hero nigh invincible. This makes the hero the victor in the end, however pussy the hero's skills actually were. This is just one of the stories at Bloody Bay in which heroes just love the inspiration called "luck"... a bit to much of it actually. That little purple steroid shot has become a hit on the streets. However, fellow villains, there is a way to beat them! Use the power of the Lazy Jerk army! Yes, the sheer number of minions overwhelms the zone and all who dwell within it. Completed triumphantly once by an anonymous yet kick-ass super group.

edit Siren's Call

This place was made famous when a superhero known as Starburst was chasing a petty criminal who stole a box of chocolates for his girlfriend. Since Starburst was too lazy to stop a bank robbery over at the next avenue he decided to attack some small time criminal, in which he had to go to the bathroom during the chase however, he couldn't hold anymore causing him to fart equvalent to a 9.0 on the Richter Scale, destroying the city and himself. This caught attention of the heroes at Paragon City, and villains at the Rogue isles, in which both sides strangely want to take over the place, which will never happen 'cause the Devs said so. There are merchants who sell stuff at villain base in which they say their famous line "What are ya buyin?" and "What are ya sellin?" It has been rumored that it is the same merchant from Resident Evil 4, but this has not been proven yet. The best strategy on fighting will be teleporting foe to a Police drone or a Arbiter drone, which you are assured to get a kill.

edit Warburg aka Saddam's former hideout

Warburg was 1st known to be Saddam's Hideout, easily identified due to the amounts of missles hes been saving up. This place tends to have a psycholgical effect on heroes and villains as they attempt to kill each other, kinda like a zombie apocalypse, except no zombies. There is a underground network controlled by Arachnos and Umbrella Corporation called the WEB, they are responsible for the arachnoid outbreak in the underground research facility. In your time in the WEB, you have to fight your way out of heroes and villains and grab 3 scientist to lead above ground, and the rest of the scientist, screw 'em!

SAFETY TIPS IN WARBURG

1. If you see a fellow villain or hero looking to save scientist at Warburg kill them. Even if they say "Don't kill me plz, Im looking for scientist to save," well you can't trust a hero or a villain so show no mercy and end them.

2. To make your trip shorter in Warburg, tp foe the hero or villain into the large group of arachnoids, they'll thank you in the future for giving them xp, its a great way to start making friends.

TYPES OF MISSLES

1. Nuclear missle: Supplied by the Soviet union, one of their many saved missles, but at Soviet Russia, the missile launches YOU!!

2. Biological missle: Has the ability to make every female character teen preggers.

3. Chemical Missle: It fires a spray of baby-lotion in your enemies eyes.

edit Recluse's Victory

The last PvP zone of the game, where the ultimate battle between good and evil is, whoever wins get to take over the zone for 5 minutes. Yes I know it sounds ridiculous, taking over something for 5 minutes then it gets reverted back. Well it is known that you can find Recluse and his "Pals" fighting the Freedom Phalanx or gang rapeing banging Sister Psyche behind Atlas' left foot, on her own free will, or is it? You can take control of robots called "heavies" they had "smallies" but they were too insufficent. The robot on the villain's side looks like a giant spider robot, that flings acid at you like from the movie Aliens. This monstrousity of Alien/Spider/Robot can move up to 1 mph, making you wait for it a whole hour for the Alien/Spider/Robot to get to you. Another feature in Recluse's Victory is the pillboxes, it has nothing to do with medicine or anything, destroy them and you get one step to controlling the zone for 5 minutes, weeeee!

edit Signature Villains of the Rogue Isles

These villains have kissed enough hands and shaken enough babies to be the "cool kids" of the Rogue Isles.

edit Lord Recluse

The evil lord of everything and leader of Arachnos. Arachnos is the leading crime syndicate in this universe and several others. Arachnos is stationed in the Rogue Isles where they bust people out of Ziggursky Prison in Brickstown on a regular basis and drop them off on Mercy Island, where most of them die horribly. Lord Recluse is a Lazy Jerk Incarnate(Ooh, mysterious!). He is famous for the robotic claws that protrude from his back. He uses them to pick at his teeth and at the bones of the recently slain. One of the less social villains, he doesn't have a personal lackey and claims to not have time to talk to lesser villains. Even with his futile efforts to take over the world(which he will never complete, as that would mean Game Over), Lord Recluse and his "Panel of Pals" finds time to run around Recluse's Victory whupping the arses of even the best heroes, including the signature heroes in which the heroes cry for backup. Unfortunately that doesn't work when Lord Recluse and his "pals" jump them all. The beating is so bad that it is said that if you wander around the zone that you can see Lord Recluse, Black Scorpion, Captain Mako, and Scirocco gang bang Sister Psyche behind Atlas' left foot, taking internet pr0n to a whole new level. The coordinants for the scene are (128, 16, -249). As a matter of fact, if you are a badge hunter, get this...

V badge TourismBadge
You have discovered the disapearance of Sister Psyche in Recluse's Victory and found out it is a little messy.

edit Black Scorpion

Much cooler than the White Scorpion, Black Scorpion is a Reckless Fool. He has made it his goal to remove any part of his body or soul that could hinder his gain of power. As a result, all that remains of his original body is a few toenails and his appendix. He is very powerful, yet very, very(in scientific terms) dumb. This villain is so mindless that when you get your Patron Power set from him he just hands you a mace and spends 10 levels teaching you how to use it.

edit Ghost Widow

Little known fact...Ghost Widow has never actually married. For a ghost, she also appears quite corporeal, so her name should be Physical Bachelorette. Ghost Widow is in fact undead, however. Through death, she gained weird mind control powers. After a short lived career as a psychic detective (overthrown by Eric Cartman) Ghost Widow became villainous and began to reap souls, pillage and plunder. She went the same way as all Gimps though, and got bored mid-career. Little is known about the middle of Ghost Widow's career as it was spent mostly being played by a power leveler named Heztehpwnzorz!!11one!11. She emerged all-powerful and 300 dollars lighter in Powerlvln fees. Now, as Lord Recluse's personal "Pal", Ghost Widow spends most of her time running around Recluse's Victory(a more friendly version of Atlas Park, one without all the low level heroes) and getting stuck in pillboxes.

edit Captain Mako

Previously the mascot of the Shinra Corporation, Captain Mako's career dwindled, and he was replaced by a Mr. Strife. Things looked grim. However, he mutated into a shark person! Conveniently, Lord Recluse drove by, and he was looking for a minion. More conveniently, Captain Mako had his resume and was ready for an interview. And most convenient of all, Lord Recluse's VW Beetle doubled as an interview parlor. So Captain Mako became one of Lord Recluse's "Pals". Mako is still a naked shark-man that has people wanting to make ripoffs of him(only to be disappointed), and he resides in a very tall building in Grandville. Mako has attacks that seem to center around sharks, strangely enough. Who would've guessed?

edit Scirocco

This Squishy villain made his debut in the propaganda film that was made to show villains in action. Unfortunately, his role was to play (Casualty of War #1) and he got his face mashed in by The Statesman. So he became a Squishy, hiding in the shadows and only coming out to kill heroes quickly and silently. However, problems arose when heroes discovered that even after being killed by Scirocco, their corpses could still talk. And Scirocco frequently heard statements like "ZOMG your the guy that got pwnd by Statmans!". What's more, he is a "ninja blade" Squishy which is much like broadsword, so as a result, some of his moves don't critical when invisible. Some have heard Scirocco even say, "hey i assassin striked you!". Scirocco's is a life of hardship, boredom and ungodly frustration. Such is the life of a Squishy, levels 1-50.

edit Events in the Rogue Isles

edit Deathsurge

Look familar to that 1980's movie, looks like your right. This creature appears around random places in Cap Au Diable, especially around the Black Market, but he ain't got no respect! I mean the poor thing just wants to buy something over at the Black Market, but he doesn't have eyes because hes just a giant volt of electricity! I think showing some respect to the creature should be the right thing, by doing the following...

1. Get Deathsurges attention

2. Lead the poor guy to the Black Market.(remember no eyes)

edit Ghost of Scrapyard

A big bulky ghost with an unending army of Illegal Immigrants Scrapyarders who follow him and defend him because he pays the most pesos cash in all of Sharkhead Isle. So you end up having them throwing dynamite at you equvalent to the amount of explosions in World War 2. They like to kill everything in their path, with the exception of other Scrapyarders. Following the Ghost of Scrapyard are the tripping Scrapyarders - breathing deep on the ectoplasmic fumes.

edit Newspaper Missions

Well this when you get a talking newspaper who will give you missions from kidnapping, killing, stealing, and finally your contact telling you to rob a bank. The kidnapping ones are when you kidnap someone and strangly the victim never tries to escape you, sometimes even when the mission is over they run back and don't even exit the door. Killing missions is when some random group like Malta, Freakshow, etc, call you out and try to kill you, in return it goes the other way around. The most dangerous group to fight at newspaper missions is the Malta, cause they have 1337 soldiers called "Gunslingers," or transformers called "Zeus Class Titan." A stealing mission is when you get an artifact of value which you don't use because it may have a voodoo curse on it, so you sell it or ship it to someone over at Paragon City, unless you have a mission called "Steal the Playstation 3 from the Freakshow" then you get to keep the object. Now robbing a bank, this is where you go to a hero zone and steal some cash, you have 15 minutes to do it before Maozilla comes and eats you. So you have to defend yourselves from Longbow, Pigs(cops), and NPC heroes who aren't to hard to deal with. So when you kill everything and grab the cash, run like bat fuck insane before Maozilla eats you!

MMORPGs
Action 52 | AdventureQuest | Asheron's Call | City of Heroes | Eternal Lands | Final Fantasy XI | Internet (video game) | Kingdom of Loathing | Lord of the Rings Online | RuneScape | Star Trek Online | Tibia | UnQuest | World of Warcraft | World of Whorecraft
Future: War of Worldcraft | Animal Crossing III | Warhammer Online

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