Chindogu

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{{Q|It's hard to be me: if only my social life left me some time for Chindogu, it would only benefit from it.|[[Oscar Wilde]]}}
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{{wikipedia}}
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'''Chindogu''' is a [[Japan|Japanese]] expression, named after [[that guy|Yadayada Sapetoku]] who was known for the dazzling amounts of time and energy he spent to be creative useless. It has everything to do with [[George W Bush|uselessness]] and virtuosity. It can be a noun, a verb, an adjective, an adverb, or a yet-to-invent grammatical item. Well, let's start with the applications that already have been research, shall we?
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=Grammar=
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'''Chindogu Nouns'''
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Chindogu, pl. ''Chindogus'', diminutive ''Chindoggy''
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* A person capable of an extraordinary performance, the development of which has costed him or her an insane amount of time, and that is as spectacular as it is totally useless.
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Example:
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{{Q|I'm tired of watching all those ''Chindogus'' on [[YouTube]]!|[[David Copperfield]] watching a video of himself.}}
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* The aforesaid performance itself
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{{Q|There he goes again: another ''Chindogu''!|[[David Copperfield]] still not [[Jean-Claude Van Damme|aware]] of who that ''Chindogu'' is.}}
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* A Bavarian folk dance.
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[[Image:JollyDisciple.jpg|thumb|250px|left|Fancy Bavarians doing the Chindogu.]]
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* An object that resolves a painfully banal human problem, and causes a couple more when applied.
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Example:
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{{Q|Take that ''Chindogu'' off the chimney, I can't see a thing through all that smoke!"|[[Ray Charles]] about his new parabolic-antenna-that-also-keeps-the-rain-out-of-the-chimney.]]}}
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* An animal that has been trained to do something remarkable and utterly superfluous.
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Example:
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{{Q|This dog is a real ''Chindoggy'': it is trained to guard e-mail boxes!|[[Charlton Heston]] about his new guard dog.}}
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'''Chindogu Verb'''
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I ''Chindogu'', you ''Chindogu'', he ''Chindogus'',
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we all ''Chindogu'', and [[they]]'re at it too!
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Only yesterday I've been ''Chindoguing'',
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because this bloke on YouTube had ''Chindogued'' one time too much!
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* To Perform something very special, something that even could resolve a nagging daily petty problem, while causing [[Condoleezza Rice|collateral damage]] galore.
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Example:
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{{Q|I am very proud to announce the intensive ''Chindoguing'' our bombers have done earlier today|The [[Donald Rumsfeld|Secretary of Defense]] once too much.}}
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'''Chindogu Adjective'''
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''Chindogu'', ''Chindoguer'', ''Chindoguest''.
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* Indicates that, however clever and well thought out<ref>Years may have passed while refining it!</ref> a [[noun]] is, it all boils down to something completely useless, a nuisance even.
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Example:
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{{Q|I feel so ''Chindogu'' today, isn't that [[hawt]]?|[[Paris Hilton]].}}
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* People will always try to outclass each other, and this Adjective can contribute a lot to that social phenomenon.
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Example:
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{{Q|This is the ''Chindoguest'' [[biatch|person]] I've ever met!|[[Pacman]] on [[Barbara Bush]].}}
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'''Chindogu Adverb'''
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''Chindoguly''
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* Indicates that even a an unsuspicious adjective or verb can go miles resolving simple troubles through complicated contraptions.
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{{Q|I feel so ''Chindoguly'' [[hawt]], is that [[normal]]?|[[Paris Hilton]] again.}}
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=Exercises=
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'''New Grammatical Items'''
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Try to find a ''Chindogu'' application that can be considered one of the following grammatical items, and use it in a sentence.
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*Article: ________________________________
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*Preposition: ________________________________
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*Conjunction: ________________________________
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*Smurf: ________________________________
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*Other: ________________________________
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Please note the last line, and feel free to add a brand new grammatical item to [[Shakespeare|Shakespeare's]] tongue!
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'''Translate the following sentences:'''
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*I ''Chindogu'' so ''Chindogu'' today, isn't that ''Chindogu''?<ref>I [[smurf]] so smurf, is that smurf?</ref>
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*A ''Chindogu'' ''Chindogu'' ''Chindoguing'' how to ''Chindogu'' is a ''Chindogu'' ''Chindogu''<ref>Un [[smurf|schtroumpf]] schtroumpf schtroumpfant schtroumpfer est un schtroumpf schtroumpf.</ref>
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Please find the solution further down there somewhere.
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[[Image:ChindoChop.JPG|thumb|250px|right|Now, isn't that a [[Flying Spaghetti Monster|Noodly]] invention?]]
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=Chindogu FAQ=
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* Q: I can do something useless and stupid, is it a ''Chindogu'' then?
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A: No it isn't, you useless stupid!
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* Q: I am useless at about anything. Am I a ''Chindogu''?
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A: No you aren't, you useless piece of uselessness!
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* Q: I studied a lot to become [[Dick Cheney|useless]], and got my degree. What kind of [[Steve Jobs|jobs]] are there for me?
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A: What does that have to do with the price of fish you plonker
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=The Philosophical Aspect, or Chindogu NFAQ =
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* Do all our actions and the results thereof need to be useful?
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* Are things around us as useful as we think them to be?
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* What would the world be without ''Chindogu''?
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* [[Mel Brooks|Why am I asking you]]?
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=You made it!=
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[[Image:Counter.gif|frame|right|Real-time counter keeping track of the number of times the word ''Chindogu'' has been read today.]]
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Yessss! Congratulations! Awarddeservingly and most ''Chindoguly'', you got through the whole page!<ref>We'll forget about the references: they're only there to add a [[research]] touch to the page anyway...</ref> That means that you ''might'' be willing to know how much the word ''Chindogu'' has been read today, and this nifty high-tech device on the right will help you with that. Your performance also shows that you're [[The Real McCoy]], and that you'll probably be able to crack a record -cloc- crack a record cloc- crack a record -cloc- crack a record -cloc- crack a record...
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Indeed, the [[Guinness Book of Records]] keeps track of shots at the following categories<ref>Again, feel free to add a category: uselessness is not the ''only'' aspect of ''Chindogu''. Creativity, bro, creativity!</ref>:
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*Biggest ''Chindogu'', and its counterpart, the Smallest ''Chindogu''.
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*Longest ''Chindogu'', and its etc...
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*Silliest ''Chindogu'', etc...
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*Oldest ''Chindogu''<ref>And its counterpart. You knew it, didn't you?</ref>.
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*Fastest ''Chindogu''.
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*''Chindoguest'' ''Chindogu''<ref>Even ''this'' one has its counterpart? True!</ref>.
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=You're good!=
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[[Image:Counter.gif|frame|left|''Chindogu'' counter-bis.]]
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Now you've done it ''again''... that's why there is a second counter here. You'll have noticed by now that it is slightly ahead of the first one, and I hope I don't have to explain why. Since you're ''good''. ''Shindogu'' but ''good''.
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=References=
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<div class="references-small"><references/></div>
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[[Category:Animals]]
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[[Category:Art]]
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[[Category:Culture]]
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[[Category:Knowledge]]
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[[Category:Language]]
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[[Category:Oscar Wildeizms]]
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[[Category:People with a silly name]]
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[[Category:Philosophy]]
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[[Category:Science and Technology]]
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[[Category:Technology]]

Revision as of 11:44, August 2, 2011

“It's hard to be me: if only my social life left me some time for Chindogu, it would only benefit from it.”
Bouncywikilogo7
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Chindogu.

Chindogu is a Japanese expression, named after Yadayada Sapetoku who was known for the dazzling amounts of time and energy he spent to be creative useless. It has everything to do with uselessness and virtuosity. It can be a noun, a verb, an adjective, an adverb, or a yet-to-invent grammatical item. Well, let's start with the applications that already have been research, shall we?

Grammar

Chindogu Nouns

Chindogu, pl. Chindogus, diminutive Chindoggy
  • A person capable of an extraordinary performance, the development of which has costed him or her an insane amount of time, and that is as spectacular as it is totally useless.

Example:

“I'm tired of watching all those Chindogus on YouTube!”
~ David Copperfield watching a video of himself.
  • The aforesaid performance itself
“There he goes again: another Chindogu!”
~ David Copperfield still not aware of who that Chindogu is.
  • A Bavarian folk dance.
JollyDisciple

Fancy Bavarians doing the Chindogu.

  • An object that resolves a painfully banal human problem, and causes a couple more when applied.

Example:

“Take that Chindogu off the chimney, I can't see a thing through all that smoke!"”
~ Ray Charles about his new parabolic-antenna-that-also-keeps-the-rain-out-of-the-chimney.]]
  • An animal that has been trained to do something remarkable and utterly superfluous.

Example:

“This dog is a real Chindoggy: it is trained to guard e-mail boxes!”
~ Charlton Heston about his new guard dog.


Chindogu Verb

I Chindogu, you Chindogu, he Chindogus,
we all Chindogu, and they're at it too!
Only yesterday I've been Chindoguing,
because this bloke on YouTube had Chindogued one time too much!
  • To Perform something very special, something that even could resolve a nagging daily petty problem, while causing collateral damage galore.

Example:

“I am very proud to announce the intensive Chindoguing our bombers have done earlier today”
~ The Secretary of Defense once too much.


Chindogu Adjective

Chindogu, Chindoguer, Chindoguest.
  • Indicates that, however clever and well thought out[1] a noun is, it all boils down to something completely useless, a nuisance even.

Example:

“I feel so Chindogu today, isn't that hawt?”
  • People will always try to outclass each other, and this Adjective can contribute a lot to that social phenomenon.

Example:

“This is the Chindoguest person I've ever met!”


Chindogu Adverb

Chindoguly
  • Indicates that even a an unsuspicious adjective or verb can go miles resolving simple troubles through complicated contraptions.
“I feel so Chindoguly hawt, is that normal?”
~ Paris Hilton again.

Exercises

New Grammatical Items Try to find a Chindogu application that can be considered one of the following grammatical items, and use it in a sentence.

  • Article: ________________________________
  • Preposition: ________________________________
  • Conjunction: ________________________________
  • Smurf: ________________________________
  • Other: ________________________________

Please note the last line, and feel free to add a brand new grammatical item to Shakespeare's tongue!

Translate the following sentences:

  • I Chindogu so Chindogu today, isn't that Chindogu?[2]
  • A Chindogu Chindogu Chindoguing how to Chindogu is a Chindogu Chindogu[3]

Please find the solution further down there somewhere.

ChindoChop

Now, isn't that a Noodly invention?

Chindogu FAQ

  • Q: I can do something useless and stupid, is it a Chindogu then?
   A: No it isn't, you useless stupid!
  • Q: I am useless at about anything. Am I a Chindogu?
   A: No you aren't, you useless piece of uselessness!
  • Q: I studied a lot to become useless, and got my degree. What kind of jobs are there for me?
   A: What does that have to do with the price of fish you plonker

The Philosophical Aspect, or Chindogu NFAQ

  • Do all our actions and the results thereof need to be useful?
  • Are things around us as useful as we think them to be?
  • What would the world be without Chindogu?
  • Why am I asking you?

You made it!

Counter

Real-time counter keeping track of the number of times the word Chindogu has been read today.

Yessss! Congratulations! Awarddeservingly and most Chindoguly, you got through the whole page![4] That means that you might be willing to know how much the word Chindogu has been read today, and this nifty high-tech device on the right will help you with that. Your performance also shows that you're The Real McCoy, and that you'll probably be able to crack a record -cloc- crack a record cloc- crack a record -cloc- crack a record -cloc- crack a record...

Indeed, the Guinness Book of Records keeps track of shots at the following categories[5]:

  • Biggest Chindogu, and its counterpart, the Smallest Chindogu.
  • Longest Chindogu, and its etc...
  • Silliest Chindogu, etc...
  • Oldest Chindogu[6].
  • Fastest Chindogu.
  • Chindoguest Chindogu[7].

You're good!

Counter

Chindogu counter-bis.

Now you've done it again... that's why there is a second counter here. You'll have noticed by now that it is slightly ahead of the first one, and I hope I don't have to explain why. Since you're good. Shindogu but good.

References

  1. Years may have passed while refining it!
  2. I smurf so smurf, is that smurf?
  3. Un schtroumpf schtroumpf schtroumpfant schtroumpfer est un schtroumpf schtroumpf.
  4. We'll forget about the references: they're only there to add a research touch to the page anyway...
  5. Again, feel free to add a category: uselessness is not the only aspect of Chindogu. Creativity, bro, creativity!
  6. And its counterpart. You knew it, didn't you?
  7. Even this one has its counterpart? True!
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