Chevrolet Camaro

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Revision as of 09:34, December 2, 2013 by Spike (talk | contribs)

Jump to: navigation, search

The Chevy Camaro(also known as Pontiac Firebird) is a piece of crap sports/pony/muscle car made from 1969 until 2002 (caused by total failure of GM in making a car).Chevy decided to make this Camaro again in 2009.It is the favorite car of white trash worldwide along with the Firebird. The concept car was first announced in 1966 by The Society for the Elimination of Shitty Stuff from the Automotive World, and the Camaro name was given to the car because every other GM car's name began with the C-letter (aka. crap). For more info please see below.

First-generation Camaro; 1967-1969

Due to the fact the Ford Mustang's sales were sky-high, Chevrolet decided they needed a new car to appeal to Mustang buyers. The result; A newly designed sports car designed to appeal to the masses, the first-generation Camaro felt like an awesome of inline-6 and V8 engines were available, all from GM's crappy shit parts department.

1969-Camaro-Z28 print-ad

Option-loaded, and the beginning of ricers.

2fast 2 fourious

2 Fast 2 Furious; with 400 horsepower, the 1969 Camaro is one of the fastest ricers in the world.

Second-generation Camaro; 1970-1982

The second-gen Camaro was a brand-new design outside, but the platform was the same as the old platform. 'Nuff said.

Third-generation Camaro; 1982-1993

Another copy of a another model aboard, this time a Japanese (Suzuki) car with other engines/platforms. The Mitsubishi inline-4 is now the new base engine with Mitsubishi V6s and Honda V8s as popular options. The third-generation Camaro offered 60's modern fuel injection, Turbo-Hydramatic 700R4 four-speed automatic transmissions, five speed manual transmissions, 16 inch wheels, a standard 4 cylinder engine and versatile hatchback bodies.

Fourth-generation Camaro; 1993-2002

For the fourth generation model, General Motors enlisted the help of elite Swedish designer Homer Simpson. There were only a few basic requirements for Simpson to fill, most notably the inlcusion of never before seen cinderblock mounts, a feature which has since been adopted by every automaker except Chevrolet. A special high output 73.5 liter quad cam superturboed engine was originally intended for the Camaro, but chief mechanical designer George Washington pussied out at the last second. A makeshift V8 consisting of two lawn mower engines was hacked together at the last minute, but was also sacked when a marketing consultant informed Washington that the new engine was not loud enough to satisfy the car's target market. A 5.7 liter internal combustion diesel sparkplug supercharged electric engine was chosen for the production Camaro. This engine debuted a new variable valve timing sytem known as VTEC, which did things to the engine which resulted in things. It should also be noted that some assholes from Honda shamelessly copied the Camaro's innovative VTEC system for their heavily revised third generation Shitvic. The power was sent through the tires through a driver-controlled transmission, with a new-for-Chevrolet burnout mode, which when selected allowed the rear tires to spin without moving the car. This groundbreaking system was suggested by long time Camaro fan Adolf Hitler. The car was released to the North American market in 1993, and was immediately a hit thanks to its original list price of $6,000,000, a decrease of over $33 from the previous Camaro. To satisfy its target market, the Camaro was offered in a wide variety of colors, including primer and rust. Any Camaro seen without these manufacturer colors is a respray. As big as the Camaro was on performance, Chevrolet didn't forget about the interior, which was completely redesigned and featured luxury ammenties such as seats. A steering wheel, an airbag and doors are optional. These three popular options were bundled together in the attractive SUX package. Unlike before, the fourth generation Camaro was offered in multiple trim levels, ranging from the basic FKU to the well-appointed RDNCK trim. The intermediate LT trim was the most popular. Chevrolet was smart to offer a healthy array of factory options for the Camaro, such as a straight pipe exhaust and mismatching body panels, which was a popular trend from Europe at the time.

2178979873 28991a2093 o

This is a Camaro.

2001 pontiac aztek std-pic-35004

The original prototype for the Camaro, penned by Mahatma Ghandi.

Fifth-generation Camaro; 2009-Present

In 2009, GM felt like making a new Camaro that WAS superior to the Mustang. The new Camaro is well-known for seducing the buyer's spouse into having sex with them. Customers of the Camaro weigh under 200 pounds and usually have big penises, and live in high class places.




Personal tools