Cats with guns

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WARNING: THIS PAGE IS WHERE WE KEEP ALL THE PICTURES OF CATS WITH GUNS! DON'T FEED THEM CATNIP!!!'
A cat inspired by The Matrix
The result of a cat with a gun losing his gun in combat.
A typical cat with sniper rifle. More commonly known as a Catsasin
A cat who is tired of that garbage that Dennis is feeding him.
Dammit, he lost his gun again.
Kitler hatches an evil plan, while trying to look inconspicuous.
cats also have the deadly eye beam which they use when they don't get food on time.
This cat isn't really armed, but it has been assimilated, which makes it all that much cooler.
This pussy cat has taken a defensive position with attacked a willing accomplice.
This kitten was driven so mad by bad American cat food it decided to commit suicide.
Is that a cat? Is that a gun? You're just putting pictures in here for no reason.It's a cat with a axe.


Contents

[edit] Overall summary

Cats with guns are a growing problem in the USA. They are being fed too much junkie cat food most of which is made out of shrooms. The agencies in the US government decided to ignore this item completely, mainly because most solutions to world problems involve killing 100 million people, and seriously, cats with guns is just a friggen brilliant idea for they are really responsible for Columbine's secret trench coat mafia founders and were really responsible for using guns against fuckin insane ugly old women.

[edit] Famous assassins of the cat world

  • Mr Paws : killed Joan of Arc
  • Mr Biggles-worth : attempted to assassinate Sir Austin Powers
  • Tom : killed Jerry
  • Felix : killed Producer for making him black and white and making owner be rude about him on TV.
  • Toonces: killed Benazir Bhutto with his cliffdriving escapades
  • Phattycatty : killed owner for naming him phattycatty.
  • Fat Freddie's cat : killed fat Freddie for making him look foolish in many a cartoon strip.
  • KG Joe's cat : killed KC Joe for zipping him up in a punch bag in sluggers gym and leaving him in there to get punched by everyone for peeing on the carpet.
  • Snowball I : committed suicide after shooting half of the city of Springfield.
  • Snowball II : shot Mr Burns for attempting to steal Maggie Simpson's lolly pop.

and finally Hitlers cat:

  • Kitler was the leader of the cats with guns and murdered millions of creatures worldwide and if you look in the cat lazer photo you'll see him there fighting George Dubya Boosh's cat
  • Lee Harvey Catwald assassinated JFK
  • Jackson Leist
  • Mr Mittens : Killed Johnny Test for killing his butler
  • Feylines : killed the monster hunter

[edit] History of cats with guns

Cat as a gun, not cat with a gun.
Cats with guns originated with Robin Hoods American pet cats great grand children with bows and arrows in the Wild West against the Cowboys. The next recorded viewing in Victorian times when they had a mass rifle shooting and killed Jack the Ripper. Unfortunately none of them were caught

Neither this or the cowboy incident are related to the dodgy cat food because the Americans hated cats at that time so therefore they would not have fed them, we do not know what caused them but scientists are slaving away in a hot laboratory at this moment trying to figure it out.

There have been countless more attacks over the years, too many to be listed but as you can probably see it is all the Americans fault even though it started with English cats.

Today there is a dangerous organization called the kung-fu cats(KFC), They don't just use guns but also are trained in unarmed combat and stealth to the same degree as ninjas. Theirr headquarters and numbers are unknown.

[edit] How to Identify a Kitten Krime

Most people know "what" a cat with a gun is, but would they recognize one if they met it on the street? There are a few ways for a person to be absolutely sure that they are looking at a cat with a gun.

  1. Cats - Most cats with guns will be at least part, if not entirely, cat.
  2. Guns - Most cats with guns will have some form of a gun.
  3. Catchphrases - Most cats with guns will have a catchphrase.
  4. Pink - Most cats with guns will be wearing pink somewhere on their body.
  5. Souless eyes - ALL cats with guns will have soulless eyes. Studies have confirmed this.
  6. X-Box 360 - This is the only system played by cats with guns.
  7. Theme music - All cats with guns will be accompanied by 90s theme music.
  8. Death - If you ever happen to view a cat with a gun, you will be dead within 5.56 seconds.
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