Care Bear Heroin
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“Yo man, I got some really good shit right here!”
~ Share Bear on Care Bear Heroin
“In soviet russia, heroin injects YOU!!!”
“I would do a quote for this article, but I'm too high.”
~ Oscar Wilde on being high
“It was Courtney!!”
~ Empty Shotgun Cartridge, following the death of Kurt Cobain
Care Bear Heroin is a drug closely related to heroin, PCP, LSD, and ecstasy. It is a hallucinogenic psychoactive drug, and is labeled as addictive but your dealer knows that's not true, that's why he wants you to buy it.
Contents |
[edit] Effects
Upon injecting Care Bear Heroin one experiences a high similar to an orgasm (but sooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better). After the initial high, hallucinations begin, and everything tastes like chicken for 20 days. If you do Heroin you will experience it's personality liberating joys. When someone tells you to be yourself they are really saying do Heroin because it liberates you from the confines and social conditions ingrained into us by the government, so do Heroin if you want to be yourself and not just another sheep to the government.
[edit] Bad Effects
None.
[edit] Really Bad Effects
Hallucinations may cause you to think you are on fire or dying in some other painful way. Also you are almost guaranteed to get a brightly colored furry infection on the injection site. Painfully characterized by a rainbow swirled swelling at the injection site which will sprout fur in the corresponding colors the skin has changed to. Soft, cuddly, infection filled, multicolored hairs of narcotic ambivalence. SOme side effects include sudden death, spontaneous combustion, and an inability to breathe.
[edit] N.O.L.Ca.Be.H.
National Organization for the Legalization of Care Bear Heroin (pronounced Nole' Cabbie) is a grass roots organization founded by Barney (no not the goofy dinosaur) Fife. He found it was the only drug that steadied his trembling hands and wants to legalize it for Medical use. Snuggles the fabric softener advertising bear donates 10% of his commercial profits and is a spokes critter for NOLCaBeH.
 | Mommy's Medicine Cabinet |
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