Burkina Faso
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
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| Official language | French, Clingon | |
| Capital | Ouagadougou | |
| Largest City | Ouagadougadougadougoudagoudoudagou | |
| Head of Government | Leslie 'BK' JG (brother of Dizzee Rascal), King of the Banana Republic | |
| Established | September 1, 1975 | |
| Currency | Giant Stone Wheels, Bananas | |
| National anthem | "Que nous dominons le monde entier!" (Translation): Some people think we're bonkers, But it's called poverty, Our leader's Leslie JG, AKA Logsleeeee! | |
“Why do I go to Burkina Faso? I guess its the raging civil war is what's so attractive about the place.”
~ Oscar Wilde on Burkina Faso
“Holy crap! This country is full of crap!”
~ Strong Bad on everywhere except Strong Baddia
“What's that smell? Is that a person?”
~ Oscar Wilde on Burkina Faso
[edit] History
Burkina Faso was first discovered by the Romans in the 5th Century BC. There, the Romans built the wonderful city of Ouagadougou (In ancient Afro-Latin, it means "The City With Name As Cool As Hippopotamus Back", plus you can barely say it 10 times fast) to house their convicts. Eventually, the Romans packed up and left, and the town(and country) was invaded by African "hunter-gatherer" types. They found an obese guy in the middle of the savannah, so they named the country "Burkina Faso", which is English-as-a-second-language-ese for Burger King's Fatso , and until the 19th century, nothing happened. In 1875, the French came and taught the poor Burkina-Fasoans how to speak their language, as well as converting them to Satanists, then they were abruptly scared off because famine turned the Burkina-Fasoans into cannibals. In 1910, Burkina Faso invaded the less-known Furkina Baso (it's Gibberish for "Yo, french fries, we're a country too! Colonize us", and ever since Furkina Baso has been part of it.
After Burkina Faso acquired Furkina Baso, its thirst for power became greater, and so they proceeded to invade a number of other countries: Bangladesh, Bhutan, Kazakhstan, Tajikstan, Turkmenistan, Uzbekistan, and every other third-world country ending in -stan. In 1934, the new "Empire of Burkina-Faso" got rid of its president and instated its current empress HRIMHIM Condoleeza Rice.
[edit] Current Affairs
The Banana Republic is oxymoronic. Currently, the state is suffering from massive debt, due to the lavish parties and expensive wardrobe of Empress Condoleeza (that the President can't control her is a sign of dark times ahead). Though some revenue has been made from the black market sale of nuclear arms from North Korea, its sole remaining colony, there are still major monetary problems in the country. Condoleeza seems to live in her own little world, when the people said, "But we have no bread!" Condoleeza is reported to have responded: "Let them eat cake!". Condoleeza must also take a jet from Ouagadougou to Washington each week (to fulfill her duties as a spy in the American government), which means no cars (no fuel) for the Burkina-Fasoans(except for Her Imperial Excellency). The country also has many connections with Gangsta-Rap artists who exploit the cheap African labour to mine for diamonds. Many Burkina-Fasoans are getting tired of their Empress's expensive lifestyle and some are even talking of some sort of "Revolution". Plans to elect Susan Boyle as Queen.
| North Africa | Algeria · Egypt · Libya · Morocco · Sudan · Tunisia · Western Sahara | 
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| West Africa | Benin · Burkina Faso · Côte d'Ivoire · Ghana · Guinea · Guinea-Bissau · Liberia · Mali · Mauritania · Niger · Nigeria · Senegal · Sierra Leone · Togo | |
| Central Africa | Angola · Cameroon · Belgium · Central African Republic · Chad · Democratic Republic of the Congo · Equatorial Guinea · Gabon · Republic of the Congo | |
| East Africa | Burundi · Djibouti · Eritrea · Ethiopia · Kenya · Madagascar · Malawi · Mauritius · Mozambique · Rwanda · Seychelles · Somalia · Tanzania · Uganda · West Kenya · Zambia · Rhodesia | |
| Southern Africa | Botswana · Lesotho · Namibia · People's Glorious Republic of Uukumbamabahalarata · South Africa · Swaziland · Zululand | |
| Dependencies | United Kingdom : Gibraltar · Indian Ocean Territory · Isle of Wight · Welsh Congo (Pitcairn Islands) |
