British Columbia

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Colombia was originally the primary South American exporter of cocaine. But they don't take their own business, Americans and western Europeans do.

The People's Republic of British Colombia (also known as Chinese Columbia, British California) was originally a small South American peninsula which slipped into the Pacific Ocean one night during a particularly violent storm and eventually washing up on the Wet Coast of Canada.

Initially the Colombians were far too stoned to notice but, after ingesting massive amounts of coffee in an attempt to keep warm, the notorious Colombian dictator Björk Edmond Auskutenfrütkn began to realise the full magnitude of the disaster and hastily gathered a landing party to invade nearby Washington state and begin the long, slow trek southward.

The fledgling Colombian colony, the District of Colombia, was soon founded with little resistance as there was little else of importance in Washington. The opposition that existed was generally stifled by the widespread practice of granting pot as a gift of peace. Animosity between young Colombia and the remainder of British North America (then known as Gringoland) continued to simmer under the smoky veneer of drug addiction.

With the advent of the personal computer, a decision was reached after much cocaine abuse to sell the entire Washington State to Microsoft and move the District of Colombia elsewhere in the US.

[edit] A Kerosene Huffers Paradise

Kerosene, A type of fuel used for lamps and stoves is a staple drug for all British Columbian, It is often dispensed at nearby "Huffbars" as they call them. The huffing scene in British Columbia was so large at one point that the government had to dispose of them all. They simply lit a Match and ran away.

[edit] Republic of Colombia

Colombia is the BEST country in the entire world. THE BEST!!!

[edit] Hong Kong West

With all of the original Colombian settlers gone, Canada was hard-pressed to find people even marginally willing to colonize the remote centres of Vancouver and Victoria (British San Fransisco).

Learning that Hong Kong was holding a "lease expired" sale in 1997, the wily Canadians tricked the capitalists of that city that to avoid the impending communist Made in China fate they should move to Canada and build a railroad from coast to coast. When the railroad scheme failed to attract enough immigrants, the decision was made to change the name to British Columbia, so the people of Hong Kong who didn't want to be Chinese could remain British.

The railroad across all of Canada scheme turned out to be a hoax (alas, there is no Newfie Bullet as The Rock is today completely devoid of railroad tracks).

The scams eventually worked well enough to convince foreigners to settle in British Columbia, a Canadian province which while now prosperous under its new Hong Kong ownership has nonetheless all but forgotten its original Colombian roots, except for the love of marijuana, which extends from the oldest cougar to the fetus in the womb. So revered is this naughty substance that tunnelling funds originally intended to extend the pathetic SkyTrain network were diverted to building an underground railway between two houses on either side of the United States border so that these Canadians can share the joy with their Idaho neighbours.

The Colombian territory is filled with hot women who are in the constant search of wealthy gringo tourists so they can eventually move to Colombia's motherland AmeriKKKA.... Another weird country.

	Central America and South America
	Central: Belize | Costa Rica | El Humidor | Guatemala | Honduras | Kittenolivia | Mexico | New Mexico | Nicaragua (en español) | Panama | Panama Canal Zone
	South: Argentina (en español) | Bolivia | Brazil (em português) | Republic of Bulimia | Cat Nation | Catspace | Chile (en español) | Colombia (en español) | Easter Island | Ecuador (en español) | Falkland Islands | French Guiana | Galapagos Islands | Guyana | Locombia | Paraguay | Peru (en español) | Seahorsia | Suriname | Uruguay (en español) | Venezuela (en español)

v • d • e

Canada, eh?

Home of the CBC, bacon, beer, Rodney McKay, cougars, killer moose, Mounties, colour, FLQ, hockey, silly football, Ice bowling, Peter North, Prime Ministers, Poutine, Studebaker Lark, Timmies, Trailer Park Boys, and people who, like, live in igloos, eh?, Caribou, ultimate Canadian power, We stand on guard for thee.

Alaska • Aquadia • Atlantis • Avril • British California • Cape Breton • Delta • Deadmonton • Florida • Jewkon • Manisnowba • Marvin Van Buren • Some Parts of Michigan • Montreal • New/Nouveau Brunswick • New Finland • New Scotland • Northworst Territories • Celine Dion • NunavOOt • Ontariariario • Outerspace • Province of New England • Québec (Quebec) • Regina • Rupert's Land • St. Pierre and Miquelon• The Province Formerly Known As Sasquatchewan • Sasquatchatoon • Saudi Oilberta • Surrey • Vancouver

[edit] Stoner capital of the world

Also known as New Budland, BC is the chronic capital of the world. If you like to smoke weed and get the munchies for weeks, BC is your paradise. The Royal Canadian Cross-country Skiing Police are so lazy they don't mind if you spark one up. However you can be denied entry if you don't own a bong. A beer bong will grant you temporary citizenship. There are many stoners here, at [[1]]

[edit] BC-STV

Citizens of British Columbia recently voted on a new system called the BC-STV (Super Train Vitesse), also known as the RAV line, which was deemed too fair a transit system and lost due to having popular support. Translink officials have commented with the cryptic, "Screw all y'alls."

[edit] Famous Columbians

• Chris Ingvaldson - Accomplished educator and athelete
  
• B.D. Jones - Trillionaire businessman and certified genius (see his official site)
• Pamela Anderson - Athlete
• Pablo Escobar - el senor