Bristol City F.C.

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BristolCityFC

Actual picture of the ground

Bristol City FC is an English football club (football being used in the loosest possible sense) based in the city of Bristol.

edit History

The club were founded in 1982 by a group of disgruntled local muck-hurlers. They were immediately accepted into the third tier of the Fizzy Drinks League, and gained their first promotion two years later. Their first trophy win came in the 85-86 season in the Mickey Mouse Cup with a 1-0 win over rivals Walt Disney Wanderers. Their victory was owing to a late own-goal from Goofy, a player that later signed over to BC. In 1990 they finished second in the Fizzy Drinks League to Bristol Rovers in a season which included a 4-0 loss to their Bristol rivals -- thanks to a hat-trick from City fan Marcus Stewart. Oh the irony.

The team remained mediocre until 2004. That year they reached the play-off final before bottling it against Brighton and Hove Albion -- although, to be fair, they were playing against two teams at once. More recently they beat local rivals Bristol Rovers, a famous win, highlighting the differences in the quality between leagues. They have had further success in the Mickey Mouse cup with a win over another local organisation, the German National team. The Germans choked when the team was struck by lightning; police later found the team captain four meters up a plane tree with a sheep in his arms. In 2008, plans were announced to relocate to a brand new, 80,000 all-seater stadium at Ilminster Avenue, in Knowle West, a pleasant, leafy, Bristol suburb. The site was chosen for its proximity to City's traditional fan base, plus the excellent public transport infrastructure and plentiful supply of recreational drugs and prostitution.

edit TV Fame

BristolCityLolZ

Google seldom disappoints

Soon to be released is the new sitcom 'Championship, You're Having a Laugh', to be filmed on location at Bristol's Ashton Gate Stadium on alternate Weekends and some Tuesdays. Special edition Cup games will be featured throughout the season, with close-up shots of players' worst moments, their facial deformities, and of course the ever-popular cutaway fan shots, titled 'Knickers, Knickers, Knickers'.

edit Current Squad

Manager - Derek 'Who drunk all the beer?' McIness

1 GK David 'Please God, don't let it go in' James

2 RB Jordan 'Why did I get loaned?' Spence

6 CB Louis 'I'm the best in the world' Carey

4 CB Liam 'Why am I the captain?' Fontaine

7 RM Marvin 'Screw this, I'm going back to Jamaica' Elliot

8 CM Neil 'Slap another one on the barbie' Kilkenny

21 CM Kalifa 'I have the same same last name as a better striker' Cisse

27 LM Albert 'Ghana pwns' Adomah

9 ST Jon 'I can actually score, oh wait' Stead

10 ST Hogan 'GET ME BACK TO QPR' Ephraim

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