Boston in 2014, featuring Tom Scholz, Brad Delp clone Tommy DeCarlo, and some other random sidemen dudes.

Boston is a long-lived AOR rock band from Boston, Massachusetts, but you probably knew that already. During their four-decade career, they have released two very successful albums, played "The Star Spangled Banner" at a ball park, and did pretty much nothing else. Band founder, guitarist, songwriter, and producer Tom Scholz is credited with creating the popular style "arena rock", later emulated by bands who are cheesy, like Styx and Bon Jovi.

Their first album, confidently named Boston, is widely known as a really great debut album whose hits are overplayed to this day on classic rock radio. Their following albums, on the other hand, are generally regarded as classic sophomore slumps that not many people listened to or know about.

Small BeginningsEdit


Early hirsute days.

Tom Scholz was a lowly Polaroid employee when he decided that he had better things in store for his life, and decided becoming a rock and roll musician was a better thing. However, when he told this to his boss, his boss replied, "Listen Tom, there's this other guy we have here, and he's working hard to feed his wife and kids. He can barely live on the money that he makes, and if you're going to milk this job until you have enough money to play rock and roll music, than that money might as well go to someone who needs it. Dig?" (in those days, the phrase "Dig?" was a very common question). Tom Scholz did dig, and continued to work at Polaroid until he acquired enough resources to build a recording studio in his basement. He promptly left the company, as his boss followed him out the door screaming "You said you dig! You said you dig!"

Shortly after, Scholz got enough people together to form a rock band. His drinking buddy Brad Delp was chosen as lead vocalist. The two went into Tom's basement and began to write and record what would be Boston's first record.

Fame and FortuneEdit


The Boston Jellyfish.

Unfortunately, as it turned out Scholz was a perfectionist, and would not let anyone interfere with the writing and recording process. Deadlines, demands for record label Epic, showers, and food were insignificant to him as he spent two years laboring over the record making it sound just right.

In 1976 the excess labor paid off, as Boston sold 22 million copies in the first week of release. All eight songs from the album are now baby boomer classic rock radio staples, with "More Than a Feeling" often playing in-between "Sweet Home Alabama" and "Smoke on the Water". In contrast to the raw production that punk bands used the following year, Boston had a very polished production. Scholz demonstrated his guitarist talents superbly and many were amazed to find out that he started out on the keyboard, while Delp's vocals demonstrated an amazing tonal range. Oh yeah, and the songs were good too.

Following the release of the album, the band went on a huge tour. Upon the tour's completion in 1977, Scholz hid in his arena rock basement from the oncoming onslaught of punk rockers for a year, secretly crafting the next big album: Don't Look Back.

Don't Look BackEdit

For the religious among us who choose to believe lies, the so-called experts at Wikipedia think they have an article about Boston (band).

In 1978, Boston released their second album, Don't Look Back in Anger. It was also a successful album, and the band got support from the fledgling MTV. The title track became a huge hit on rock radio, but paper and scissors radio paid little attention. At this point it was noticed that although the band was said to hail from Boston, singer Delp allegedly did not have a Boston accent; to this he replied, "Youh fuckin' dumb. I love that dihty watah down by the rivah Chahles. Yankees suck!"

Since Don't Look Back was NOT hailed as the greatest debut album of all-time (because it was Boston's second album), Tom Scholz took another vacation, this one lasting approximately nearly three decades. Stopgap "greatest hits" albums were released in this interim, each containing hundreds of remixes of "More Than a Feeling".

Death and destructionEdit


The real Boston: One man and his hair.

In 2007, Brad Delp committed suicide. Police emerged in his apartment building and found four times the lethal amount of laughing gas. They reported to news networks, "Brad Delp's death has upset us all appears that he commited suicide because...*giggle*...he was sick of waiting for Tom to make another album...WAHAHAHA! Oh my god, did you hear? Two singers walk into a bar and...HAHAHA! Please, I can't go further."

Because Delp was the only member besides Scholz who cared about playing in the band by this point, all plans for a future album and tour were canceled. This led many to believe that the band Boston as they know was is gone. The fate of the band was briefly left uncertain, and for all fans knew, the next album could've been a polka album with Avril Lavigne as lead singer.

In a way fans would believe correctly; the Boston as they knew it was gone, as it wasn't the same without Delp's soaring anthemic rock vocals. Instead, Scholz pulled together and hired longtime Boston fanboy Tommy DeCarlo as Delp's replacement in a Brad Delp soundalike contest. They are currently touring and playing old nostalgia hits; Scholz keeps promising he'll make a new album any day now, but always procrastinates and seems more preoccupied with charity work.