Blankism
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To many of you people out there, you fellow uncyclopedians, this is a blank article. You are very wrong indeed. This is an article about Blankism.This article is written in one of the Six Tricks of Blankism, and it is the only one available to be used on a computer, hence, I am using it. Now, if I am going to make a link, I will warn you by telling you that it is a link. OK? Still, this article is not blank; in fact, you can read this if you have the godly powers of Blankism, which few humans possess. I am one of the humans. But if you are reading this text from the edit section, well, (link) -->fuck you twice over</span. Any way, this article closely resembles the quality article of (link) -->Nihilism, an article that was featured and got the top ten of 2005 award, even though it had no text WHATSOEVER. Right. It was blank. It didn't have the old invisible text like this article, but it had the completely blank.
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Now then, Blankism is a power, nothing more. It can be possessed by humans as far as we know, and if animals could read, perhaps some could possess this unworldly power. But it gives you the talent to know the Six Tricks of Blankism, which is good on your résumé and on a college application. So, this article tells you the Six Tricks of Blankism and how to read them, so you too can master the power of this tricky thing.
Trick One: The "Blank Face
The blank face is a trick of Blankism that makes you appear as though you are distracted at that piece of broccoli wedged between the innocent onlookers two front teeth. The face is completely emotionless, and it is supposed to make the victim think you are brainwashed.
Identification
If you see someone who appears like this, you know that that are either A) Brainwashed, or B) a powerful Blankist. The usually always true and obvious conclusion for that is A) they are brainwashed, because few, and do I mean few, people on earth have this exceptional talent. The odds are more likely that the person in a mind warped dummy rather than a powerful Blankist. However, just to make sure, you must go up to the person and whisper in their ear: "Are you a Blanker?" If they are a "Blanker", than they will spin around once and continue with what they were doing. If not, they will walk away. Now you know how to identify this type of Blankist, so now let's move on to how to become one.
How to Become a "Blanker"
Becoming a blanker is quite an easy task; really, it is the easiest of all. To get started, you must act as though you are looking at something ahead of you. Start with something of your own, your douche bag, teddy bear, wallet, anything. Just look at it. Act as though you are a dummy, just stare, and your face will fall blank. Then, keeping the face, you move into public, at if you keep the face, you’ve mastered the first trick of Blankism! Congratulations!
Trick Two: The Invisible Fence
The invisible fence is really quite interesting. It kills your pesky neighbors, frightens the dog and grills good hotdogs. This invisible fence is really highly ultra sonic rays, completely invisible, but yet deadly if touch. If interfered with, you will get zapped and die. This fence is the second and most deadly of the tricks.
Identification
The identification of the invisible fence is indeed a difficult task, but it is possible with the right equipment.
The equipment you need:
- Your annoying neighbor
- An annoying dog
- A pillow
So, if you ever have a suspicion that an invisible fence is somewhere, get only one of those items listed. All will do, most preferably the annoying neighbor or dog. So what you do is take the neighbor and tell him to walk to the area where you believe that the fence might be. Tell him to keep walking until you say. If he suddenly gets zapped, well, there's a fence there and your neighbor is dead. With the dog, play fetch and chuck something in the direction of the fence and if they suddenly vaporize from a bolt of electricity, you're in luck. The pillow option means just chuck a pillow in that direction, and if it blows up into a feathery mess, well, there you have it.
From here, it is complicated and expensive to make an invisible fence, so we won't discuss that. So congrats! Another trick mastered, and another step closer to becoming a blankist.
Trick Three: The Blank Sheet of Paper
The bank sheet of paper is the most obvious trick, but it confuses people so badly. This trick is generally used for enemies who are acting like the allies of the Blankists, but they are really enemies. If you know this, use the third trick of Blankism, the Blank sheet of paper. This trick strangely comes before trick four, which is crucial to know before this trick. However, the creator made it this way so live with it.
Now then, this trick is for usage on ENEMIES ONLY! Never use this on one of your fellow Blankists, for if they report you you will be banned.
Identification
Enemies will use this trick on us fellow Blankists all the time so it is important to know if it is a fake or if a real person gave you a real note. The trick is feeling the paper. Now, if it feels regular, it is blank. The trick is feeling for areas stiffer than normal, for those will be the spots were the ink has been used. So feel for the stiff parts of the paper to confirm it being a note.
How to Pull off the Trick
Now this trick has to be the easiest to pull off. All you do is get a blank sheet of paper, now writing, nothing, and give it to the enemy. Make sure it's an enemy though. I don't really know how to do that though, so, yeah.
Trick Four: Invisible Ink
The invisible ink Trick. This trick is the most popular form of communication. there will be no need for an Identification section, for you know the procedure as explained in the step above. Just feel for stiffness.
Reading the Ink
Reading these messages is simple. Just hold them over a lit flame and you will be able to read it.
How to Use the Trick
Using this trick is fairly simple. The first thing you need to have is one of the materials that make good ink. And you need paper.
Here are some good inks:
- Milk
- Lemon Juice
- Ink that you made in the stupid chemistry set in your closet
- Urine
- Sperm
So, acquiring one of those for the ink is a crucial step. So now what you do is write whatever you want on the paper using the inks.
Hint: This is a good way to write checks.
Trick Five: Invisibility Cloak
The invisibility cloak is quite a cloak, in fact it is the best cloak of all. In makes you invisible, much like this text is, but it won't be revealed by clicking and dragging.
Identification
The only way you can identify someone in an invisibility cloak is using an infrared video system hat detects heat instead of light, so then you got the person under there.
Using the Cloak
Using the cloak is very simple. The only problem is acquiring one. What you can do is steal that one from the Harry Potter books, or you could just make your own, which is harder than my cock. Still, all you really have to do is get it and put it on, and then you're invisible. So that is how you use the cloak, but you also have to walk quietly and not breathe loud or you'll be detected. So there goes number 5!
Trick Six: Invisible Text
Invisible text is what you are reading right now. It appears to be invisible until you click and drag. That reveals the entire message. And if you are actually reading this there is no need to explain, but I will anyway.
Identification
in order to identify the hidden text, you have to move your cursor over an area where you suspect invisible text could be. When you see that I shaped thing, then you know that that the hidden text is there. You should have found that out on this article. Then you just click, drag, and read.
Writing Hidden Text
Text
To write this invisible text, you should go to edit to see how. You have to use the code to make color which is:
(In these "< >" --> font color="white")
That makes the text white, therefore invisible. It is really quite easy. Links, however, are a different story.
Links
To make a link in visible, you must insert this code:
(in "< >" things: span class="nounderlinelink">[[<insert link here>|<span style="background: FEFFFF; cursor: default; color: white;"<insert link name here>/span]]/span)
It is much more difficult than you think, but just copy and paste it and you're good.
CONGRATS! YOU'RE A BLANKIST!
You did it! Now you, <insert name here>, are a blankist, and have the talent. You have mastered Blankism! Leave a message on (link) -->this talk page and you will get an award for being cool like that!
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