Bill Nye the Science Guy
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“Bill Nye's show's use of repetition is tasteful. ”
~ An idiot on Bill Nye the Science Guy
“Can you say Bill one more time!?!. ”
~ Bill Nye on how he likes hearing his name said over and over again in the theme song of his show.
“IF YOU SAY BILL FUCKING NYE ONE MORE TIME I'LL TEAR OFF YOUR BALLS AND DO SCIENCE EXPERIMENTS ON THEM! NOW CALM THE FUCK DOWN!!! ”
~ A easiy annoyed person on Bill Nye's theme song
“Bill! ”
~ An idiot on doing exactly what he just said what not to do.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ”
~ An idiot on what it feels like to have your balls torn off and have science experiments conducted on them
Sir William Jefferson Clinton Nye, also known as Bill Nye the Science Guy, Bill Nye the Scientologist Guy, Bill Nye Your Mom's A Guy, Bill Nye likes Other Guys, or even Sir funkmaster deluxe Bill Nye of keeping the funk alive IN SCIENCE!!, is widely recognized as both the founding father of YouTube Poop, and the guy from that really annoying edutainment show. That annoying edutainment show is Bill Nye the Science Guy. Though it was only supposed to air from 1993 to 1997, the series actually ran from 1978 to 2066, thanks to an accident on set during the filming of the time travel episode.
Contents |
[edit] The intro
Bill Nye the Science Guy!
(Deep voice)Bill Nye the Science Guy...
Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill Nye the Science Guy!
*sweet guitar solo*
Science rules. Bill Nye the Science Guy!
Inertia is a property of matter.
Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Bill Nye the Science Guy.
Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill! Bill!
T-minus seven seconds.
Bill Nye the Science Guy!
Today's article is brought to you by Uncyclopedia. Uncyclopedia - telling it like it is to the uninformed masses since 1969. Thats right, 1969. The year of 69. Now that's a science enperiment. :)
[edit] Entertainment Career
Nye began his career on a local sketch comedy show called Almost Live!, where he redeemed himself as a geek by correcting the host on the pronunciation of a word. He then went ahead and showed that clip seventeen times just for the hell of it. Later on, he appeared in Back to The Future: The Animated Series, doing a short bit OF SCIENCE! where he would demonstrate science. These educational segments of SCIENCE! introduced the cool kids of the '80s to the geeky concepts OF SCIENCE! To everyone's dismay, he never really covered what a flux capacitor really is and how it works.
From this he gained national fame, and got his own TV show OF SCIENCE! called Bill Nye the Science Guy. Bill Nye the Science Guy revolutionized comedy as we know it, as he was one of the first people to use repetition until it isn't funny.
[edit] The Music Video at the End
Song: Whatever, He's Nye Artist: T. Nye Not That Bad Records
Bill's a wreck
he's not very nice
He can shoot rockets all night
But he can do whatever, he's Nye
Yeah, he can do whatever, he's Nye, yeaaaaah
Learning about cells, so lame, so dull
But The Science Guy won't take your bull
He can do whatever, he's Nye
Yeah, he can do whatever, he's Nye, yeaaaaah
[edit] Time Traveling Adventures
Nye accidentally discovered time travel due to an incident with a potato gun, Colgate toothpaste, two squirrels, and a warm pumpkin pie. After noticing that he wasn't in his studio anymore, but rather, inside Abraham Lincolns bathtub, he realized that he had traveled back in time to the good ol' days of yore, where blacks were still enslaved, women had little rights, and the world made sense. After getting out of the tub he ran into Lincoln about to shave, calling his beard "Gay" Nye rebutted, knowing who this iconic 16th president was, and told him to keep it. They then promptly high-fived and declared war on the southern states, saying that, "Jefferson Davis is a bitch" and breaking a bottle of whiskey over his secretaries' head. Nye then turned the tide in the war years later by distracting the confederate generals with the baking soda and vinegar volcano OF SCIENCE! He then realized that thanks to the Union winning the war, Dr. Sam Beckett could finally leap back to his time and get out of Lincolns body just after dodging an awkward situation where he was about to sodomize John Wilkes Booth with a baseball bat, then promptly after , a hockey stick. Lincoln was supposedly assassinated later during a play, but those events are still argued over in history circles today.
Bill then decided to duck out and join some jackass named "The Doctor" and travel around in this trippy-ass box called a TARDIS. The Doctor then promptly kicked out Bill due to the fact that The Doctor didn't like having someone who uncannily had better skills at Street Fighter II, which Nye immediately replied by dropping a log on the Doctor's floor and saying, "Your Guile sonic boom's ain't shit against my mean-ass Ken skills"
“I'm serious, the guy can play a mean game of Street Fighter 2 ”
~ Doctor Who on Regarding Bill Nye the Science Guy
His travels soon came to a close when one of the squirrels died, and eventually had to find one after he accidentally landed on the Genesis planet from Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Khan which was completely devoid of squirrels, he stowed away on the H.M.S Bounty which was a Klingon Bird of Prey that Kirk stole from Commander Kurge in the Star Trek film "The search for Spock" . He then booked it like a motherfucker when they landed in San Fransisco in 1986 and promptly found another Squirrel, and a new Pumpkin pie, since he had ate it on the flight back to Earth. And then decided to make bank by traveling to 1978 to make bank and start his show anew.
[edit] His Android Friend
Nowadays, Bill now roams around with his android, The Tyrannosaurus Rex Abraham Lincoln and fights evil allover the universe, including his arch nemesis Unicron. He made this android when he was bored one day, and made the "Trans-dimensional mind download to robot form device OF SCIENCE!" And made a copy of Abe's brain and put it in his super advanced robot buddy.
[edit] Other Facts
- Bill Nye is in fact King of the internet contrary to popular belief.
- Bill Nye is an underground street Fighter.
- Bill Nye once transmuted his own feces into pure Colombian Cocaine. Then promptly sold it for money to buy a large Mr. Coffee Machine and 50 pounds of pure Colombian Coffee.
- Bill Nye also can play a mean-ass game of tekken, and is known to make a man shit acid from such a awe worthy combo.
- Bill Nye also is recommended to bring on a trip to Jurassic Park, due to the fact that he made Dinosaur Abraham Lincoln and is the only one who can tame this great beast.
- Bill Nye also helped Mel Gibson Defeat Def Leppard's attempted takeover of the rock of ages which was a really, old, useless rock...but...apparently the holder of said rock can control the universe, this really was some load of bullshit made up by Bill Nye himself out of boredom one day.
- Bill Nye is the unifying theory of physics, that all things come back to Bill, and Bill had involvement in everything around you.
- Bill Nye also has sword fighting skills rivaling Afro Samurai
- Bill Nye is also known to be the distant grandfather of Scorpion.
- It is well documented that you should never fuck with Sir Funkmaster Bill Nye, EVER, just DON'T FUCKING DO IT.
- Bill Nye is Albert Einstein without the Super 'Stache.
[edit] Links
bill nye is bill nye
