Beer volcano

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edit Beer volcano

“What a waste of a good beer!”
~ Pub owner on Beer Volcano

A beer volcano is an activity or game in which you put beer in a glass and then add 9 or 10 Alka-Seltzer tablets. The beer starts fizzing and soon overflows. When the room is flooded and you are swimming in a 5 ft deep pool of beer, the activity is over. Unless you wear beer goggles and a Beersuit you will get Beerinyoureyesitis and probably die.

As far as we, and Sophia the Puzzle potato, know, there is no Beerinyoureyesitis hospital. The way to clean the house in order to be able to do this again is to go under-beer and drink it all up. You will float to the bottom and hit your head. You, however, will suffer Toomuchbeeritis.

Beer-mug

The BV in action

edit Variant

Beer is pumped into your mouth with a syringe. You open your mouth and out comes the beer, in a giant fountain. Okay, not a great thing to do at a dinner party. Not great at the pub either. Better just around midnight.

edit List of variants

  • Beer fountain -- shown above
  • Beer in a pipe -- blowing it out of a straw
  • Beer gun -- similar to Beer in a Pipe but involving pressing the straw to propel out the beer
  • Beer in a pressurised container -- pressing out the beer while still in the can

edit Song

Oh, beer, what can the matter be?

Oh, beer, what can the matter be?

Oh, beer, what can the matter be?

Johnny's too long at the pub.


He promised he'd buy me a bottle of lager,

He promised he'd buy me a bottle of lager,

He promised he'd buy me a bottle of lager,

To make me all fizzy and drunk.

edit Poem

The beer is pumped into the glass,

And in the glass the Alka Seltzers fizz,

The mixture slowly overflows,

And the practiser is left under-beer.


Under-beer is the practiser left,

As the glass pours out more and more,

A foamy film is left on top,

And the practiser is left in cheer.

By P. T. Cruiser

edit Facts

  • The BV was (partly) used to gain a country's independence.
  • The BV may be used as a weapon in WW3 (if there will be one)
  • The BV is a vital part of heaven to believers in the FSM.

edit See also

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