Battle of Brisbane

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<br>Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Maecenas euismod faucibus eros vitae consectetur. Morbi pharetra metus non felis tincidunt nec ullamcorper tortor dictum. Cras tincidunt vulputate justo, sit amet blandit risus pharetra in. Mauris aliquam nulla ac massa sollicitudin hendrerit. Vestibulum id est at quam faucibus commodo. Aliquam cursus dui in quam molestie suscipit. Integer augue orci, dignissim sed convallis non, molestie a lectus. Duis dignissim nulla dui, non dapibus nisl. Maecenas convallis convallis massa, nec facilisis dui varius ac. Pellentesque a feugiat erat. Mauris metus massa, suscipit sagittis viverra quis, luctus quis diam. Mauris elit magna, tincidunt in commodo et, laoreet eget purus. Pellentesque odio arcu, dictum et scelerisque nec, fermentum non nunc. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Maecenas euismod faucibus eros vitae consectetur. Morbi pharetra metus non felis tincidunt nec ullamcorper tortor dictum. Cras tincidunt vulputate justo, sit amet blandit risus pharetra in. Mauris aliquam nulla ac massa sollicitudin hendrerit. Vestibulum id est at quam faucibus commodo. Aliquam cursus dui in quam molestie suscipit. Integer augue orci, dignissim sed convallis non, molestie a lectus. Duis dignissim nulla dui, non dapibus nisl. Maecenas convallis convallis massa, nec facilisis dui varius ac. Pellentesque a feugiat erat. Mauris metus massa, suscipit sagittis viverra quis, luctus quis diam. Mauris elit magna, tincidunt in commodo et, laoreet eget purus. Pellentesque odio arcu, dictum et scelerisque nec, fermentum non nunc. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Maecenas euismod faucibus eros vitae consectetur. Morbi pharetra metus non felis tincidunt nec ullamcorper tortor dictum. Cras tincidunt vulputate justo, sit amet blandit risus pharetra in. Mauris aliquam nulla ac massa sollicitudin hendrerit. Vestibulum id est at quam faucibus commodo. Aliquam cursus dui in quam molestie suscipit. Integer augue orci, dignissim sed convallis non, molestie a lectus. Duis dignissim nulla dui, non dapibus nisl. Maecenas convallis convallis massa, nec facilisis dui varius ac. Pellentesque a feugiat erat. Mauris metus massa, suscipit sagittis viverra quis, luctus quis diam. Mauris elit magna, tincidunt in commodo et, laoreet eget purus. Pellentesque odio arcu, dictum et scelerisque nec, fermentum non nunc.
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[[Image:Brisbane 1943.jpg|thumb|right|350px|The flaming [[You|Christmas puddings]] are just out of shot to the left. Honest.]]
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{{Wikipediapar|Battle of Brisbane}}
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{{Wilde|We shall fight on the beaches, we shall... oh forget it, I'm going to go watch some [[pr0n]].|The Battle of Brisbane}}
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{{q|It didn't actually happen.|[[Captain Obvious]]|The Battle of Brisb- ooooohh, tasty pudding!}}
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The '''Battle of Brisbane''' is widely considered the most important event of [[World War II]], where [[Australian]] troops mounted on flaming [[Christmas]] puddings and Australian made [[peanut and butter|peanut butter]] jars utterly annihilated the Japanese invaders who threatened their home, along with the supporting America troops.
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==Beginnings==
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The battle began when the Japanese arrived in Moreton Bay on the November 26-27 1942, in search of a decent fish and chip shop, and a good whaling spot. The local troops who were quite busy getting drunk and chasing kangaroos in their puddings totally failed to notice the approaching menace. The [[American]] troops however, who busy sulking after being ejected from the local pub for being [[American|fucksticks]] did spot them and took to the skies in their newly refurbished pencil cases. After 90 hours of all out battle, one Australian beer glass was broken.
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This was the last straw for the locals, who had been putting up with that ''"awful racket"'' for the duration of the battle, joined the battle. With rubber-band motors roaring like furious butterflies, the peanut butter jars led the attack with the puddings flying top cover. The battle was incredible, with not a single casualty on either side, until one of the puddings was keyed by one of the Japanese chefs.
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The Australian Government, headed by Mark Latham then authorised the dropping of the incredible new weapon perfected by an Australian Government Squirrel: The ''Amanda Vanstone Eat'em All Monster''. Within seconds, the entire Japanese fleet, along with most of the Americans were gone, sucked away into Amanda Vanstone's Stomach, where everything seemed to have a clock in it, including the major life form, a race odd sentient [[Strawberry fields|strawberries]].
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The energy needed to create this was drawn directly from hot air blown into a gas turbine by John Howard's lies, and inexplicably caused the utter destruction of [[Hiroshima]] and [[Nagasaki]]. As a side effect, Hello Kitty was created, and swiftly destroyed by a volley from the Australian 653rd's blunderbuss, and a few rocks thrown by some kids.
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Within the hour, Australian puddings circled over [[Tokyo]], and Japanese landlord [[Ash Ketchum]] was forced to sign a peace agreement, and hand over his [[Alienware]] computer, electronic mouse and [[Razer]] special edition gaming keyboard which is used to this day to play pacman in prime minister's office at the Australian Federal Parliment house, [[Canberra]].
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==Noted Australians at the battle==
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*[[Nicholas Johnson]] (Sargent of the 653rd Bulnderbuss regiment)
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*Peter Mckinlay (Christmas pudding pilot, an ace with over 100 kills)
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*"[[Some guy|Greg Carse]]" (unknown Victory student from Gympie (a massive hole if you didnt know)
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*[[MOOSE]] (an animal or pudding it depends how you look at it))
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==See Also==
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*[[Australian civil war]]
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*[[peanut and butter]]
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*[[Brisbane]]
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[[Category:Battles]]
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[[Category:Military history of Australia]]
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[[Category:Queensland]]

Latest revision as of 08:40, July 5, 2012

Brisbane 1943

The flaming Christmas puddings are just out of shot to the left. Honest.

Bouncywikilogo6
For those without comedic tastes, the self-proclaimed experts at Wikipedia have an article about Battle of Brisbane.

“We shall fight on the beaches, we shall... oh forget it, I'm going to go watch some pr0n.”
~ Oscar Wilde on The Battle of Brisbane

“It didn't actually happen.”
~ Captain Obvious on The Battle of Brisb- ooooohh, tasty pudding!

The Battle of Brisbane is widely considered the most important event of World War II, where Australian troops mounted on flaming Christmas puddings and Australian made peanut butter jars utterly annihilated the Japanese invaders who threatened their home, along with the supporting America troops.

edit Beginnings

The battle began when the Japanese arrived in Moreton Bay on the November 26-27 1942, in search of a decent fish and chip shop, and a good whaling spot. The local troops who were quite busy getting drunk and chasing kangaroos in their puddings totally failed to notice the approaching menace. The American troops however, who busy sulking after being ejected from the local pub for being fucksticks did spot them and took to the skies in their newly refurbished pencil cases. After 90 hours of all out battle, one Australian beer glass was broken.

This was the last straw for the locals, who had been putting up with that "awful racket" for the duration of the battle, joined the battle. With rubber-band motors roaring like furious butterflies, the peanut butter jars led the attack with the puddings flying top cover. The battle was incredible, with not a single casualty on either side, until one of the puddings was keyed by one of the Japanese chefs.

The Australian Government, headed by Mark Latham then authorised the dropping of the incredible new weapon perfected by an Australian Government Squirrel: The Amanda Vanstone Eat'em All Monster. Within seconds, the entire Japanese fleet, along with most of the Americans were gone, sucked away into Amanda Vanstone's Stomach, where everything seemed to have a clock in it, including the major life form, a race odd sentient strawberries.

The energy needed to create this was drawn directly from hot air blown into a gas turbine by John Howard's lies, and inexplicably caused the utter destruction of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. As a side effect, Hello Kitty was created, and swiftly destroyed by a volley from the Australian 653rd's blunderbuss, and a few rocks thrown by some kids.

Within the hour, Australian puddings circled over Tokyo, and Japanese landlord Ash Ketchum was forced to sign a peace agreement, and hand over his Alienware computer, electronic mouse and Razer special edition gaming keyboard which is used to this day to play pacman in prime minister's office at the Australian Federal Parliment house, Canberra.

edit Noted Australians at the battle

  • Nicholas Johnson (Sargent of the 653rd Bulnderbuss regiment)
  • Peter Mckinlay (Christmas pudding pilot, an ace with over 100 kills)
  • "Greg Carse" (unknown Victory student from Gympie (a massive hole if you didnt know)
  • MOOSE (an animal or pudding it depends how you look at it))

edit See Also

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