Bad Nigger Attitude

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BNA

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For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about BNA.

Bad Nigger Attitude (BNA) - as distinguished from DNA - is a fascinating genetic aberration that quite possibly came into existence when genes harvested from a belligerent caveman's tooth were sexually crossed with those of a hardcore whatchamacallit. Before the resulting anomaly could be studied, however, it was spirited deep into the African jungle by mad scientists hell-bent on creating a new mystery, which they dubbed, BNA (having simply replaced "B with "D")[1]. But this fandango was not without the side-effect of developing just as planned - because soon this BNA infected many of the local natives who, through forced immigration in the guise of overseas job placement, led to an American phenomena which persists even now. Subsequently, BNA spawned new genres of language and humour called Jive and Gangsta Rap. Like it or not, BNA is here to stay.

BNA genetics

Tyson-kong

Bad Nigger Attitude (retired)

Over View

BNA is not a racial gene any more than Polio is a Polish gene or insanity is an insane gene, and it is not confined to Melanin-excessive individuals. But because BNA originated in Africa, some people brought from Africa to America carried the BNA Gene. While most other blacks transformed from sold slaves into free super-human African-American basketball players, crack dealers, pimps, musicians, entertainers, Secretaries of State, and President, still, those infected with BNA have only devolved into a rollicking comedy routine[2].

Roots

When God created Adam and Eve, He also created King Kong and Fay Wray. God first put Adam & Eve in the Garden of Eden, and then put King Kong and Fay Wray into the Garden of Africa. He named these creatures as Man/Woman and Homeboy/Bitch respectively. In turn, Adam was tempted by an apple, and Homeboy was tempted by a banana. Life was good and all was well until madmen, desirous of creating a new genre of wittiness, developed and introduced BNA into the jungle[Citation not needed at all; thank you very much].

Discovery

Discovered accidentally by Dr. Jane Watts-Compton, these infected savages led by Tarzan, were soon ruthlessly subdued, tamed, taught to walk upright, and shipped to America as unpaid labor. But because slavery was illegal in America, Jane and Tarzan were arrested for 'Human Trafficking', and the infected slaves were freed immediately upon arrival in the USA. Little did medical science know that this thoughtless immigration would eventually infect vulnerable people throughout the United States with BNA, spreading orally like Ear Herpes.

Freedom

Although the infected slaves were freed, they had no way home, nowhere to go, and nothing to do. They had nothing to do because slaves don't work for money. It's a Catch 22 because by law businesses must pay the Africans minimum wage, but slaves only labor for free. And they couldn't be deported back to Africa because they had become African-American nationals. Thus taking full advantage of this legal predicament the BNA infected natives became their own burden. Running around idle, these unwitting carriers spread the humorous gene far and wide.

Nigga-rochester

Rochester’s famed and much-loved ‘good attitude’

Bad Nigger Attitude is opposite of GNA Attitude

African American Attitude aka GNA is white when compared to Bad Nigger Attitude. Examples: Colin Powell, Sammy Davis Jr., and Barak Obama have an African-American attitude that’s white as Angel-food cake; but Eminem, Charles Manson, and Lindsay Lohan are examples of BNA that’s black as Devil’s Food Cake. In fact, BNA has nothing to do with skin colour.

Example of GNA

“Yaosir, Mista Benny!”
~ Rochester

Rochester is at the top of the good attitude list, followed by every other equal or lesser person, who cooperates with society without grabbing their crotch and exclaiming, Suck my dick, masta![3]

Example of BNA

“I want to kill people. I want to rip their stomachs out and eat their children!”
~ Iron Mike

Mike Tyson was once upon a time a professional at the top of the BNA list. Although at present Iron Mike has found a new calling as speech coach to former President Dubya Bush. At the very bottom of the BNA list is Tyrone. Tyrone has a Bad Nigger Attitude no one, especially African Americans, wants to deal with, including Rev Jesse Jackson.

See Also

References

  1. "Mad Scientists Tamper With Bad Attitude Gene", AMA Digest, March 1948
  2. Ebony, March 2009 Issue, Page 72
  3. Eddie Murphy said so!
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