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31,460 Planets Destroyed for Interstellar Bypass

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Featured Vogon Poem


Gashee morphousite

Gashee morphousite, thou expungiest quoopisk Fripping lyshus wimbgunts, awhilst moongrovenly kormzibs. Bleem miserable venchit! Bleem forever mestinglish asunder frapt! Gerond withoutitude form into formless bloit, why not then? Moose. More...

Recently featured: The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul - The Meaning of Liff - Mostly Harmless - Shada

Yesterday's featured poem


Oh Freddled Gruntbuggly,

Oh freddled gruntbuggly, Thy micturations are to me As plurdled gabbleblotchits On a lurgid bee. Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes And hooptiously drangle me With crinkly bindlewurdles, Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, See if I don't! More...

Vogon Trivia

  • ...That your house is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass?
  • ...That your house is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass?
  • ...That your house is just about to be torn down in order to make way for a new bypass?

Constructor Fleet Headlines

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Second Front Pages: BrexitHillary!TrumpUK 2015 electionGreece

On This Day in the Megabrantis cluster...

Peeing Calvin

October 27: National "Peeing Calvin" Bumper Sticker Day

  • 1875 - Oscar Wilde decided to avoid his normal routine and go to the barbers before attending his routine denouncement
  • 1956 - The Great One's first toenail grew in. Widely considered to be particularly unspectacular, this event is overlooked by hoards of Bushists who hold wild street parties, which begin with tea and quiet chatting and end in mass orgies. Oh, hee hee, I said a dirty word on the internet! Is that even allowed?
  • 1998 - Mother of Pearl Sunday when several people attempted to create a zombie of Michael Jackson.
  • 6000 - John F. Kennedy pees on Calvin.
  • 2101 - Chuck Norris pees twice on Calvin. Then pees on Hobbes and Bill Watterson. Can you beat that John?

Today's featured picture


The beauty and decisiveness of the Vogon race is apparent with one look at the firm jawline, the blazing eyes, and the oozing smell of stale beer with a hint of burning cat hair

Image Credit: Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz
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Recent Poems

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Count Dooku (r/w) | HowTo:Help the Green Party | Impressionism (pictured) | Millennials | Georges Danton | Yaroslavl | Methodists | Strauss and Howe | Cartoon Network (r/w) | Billy Joel (r/w) | Tim Berners-Lee | Saturday Night Fever | Anarchy | Theresa May | Tim Farron | Benedict Cumberbatch | Melania Trump | Courtney Love | Pokémon Go | Pets | Lapwing | Brexit | Glastonbury Festival | Dog (r/w) | Stradbroke (r/w) | Hotline (disambiguation) | Worcester, England | Canon (camera) | Rolls Royce | Accident | BMW

More recent poems | Most wanted poems | Requested poems | Add to stubs | Lonely poems | Poetry Review | Try writing a poem about... | Stuck stanzas

Hitchhiker and Towel of the Month


A well-known British hitchiker, Braydie Dent has hitched over a dozen stellar systems. His most known phrases consist of: What? and Tea please!. On his spare time he enjoys insanity, cricket, and that famous game that those British enjoy so much...what was it? Oh! Self loathing. Yes.


This months Towel is the infamous TowelHax. He has captured a unique perspective of the Galaxy's events with his travels across the milky way. Sass that froopy towel. He knows where his towel he is.

Vote for Hiker of the month | Vote for Detached Arm of the Month | Vote for the Triple Breasted Whore of the Month | Past Winners

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