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Bureaucracy "No rest for the wicked," they say. Today had been the worst day of my life: my girlfriend had killed herself and stipulated in her suicide note that she was my long lost sister, with a PS that I should get tested for AIDS. Then I had gone to the clinic to get tested, and though I had come up negative, the doctor told me that they had accidentally used a dirty needle to take the blood sample, giving me a promotional brochure featuring many different medications that I would promptly have the privilege of choosing to fit my lifestyle.
Going for the Poo Lit Surprise Best Image with this one. In the shade of her voluminous pirate hat, the receptionist glared at me like just one of the many other personal insults that she had to put up with daily. "Hi," I began. "Uh, the vending machine swallowed my coin."
"Arr, it does that."
"Can you refund me please?"
"Flavoured Carbonated Glucose Solution Supply & Affairs department, 13th floor."
"What? 13th floor? Can't you just give me the money?"
"ARR, do ye be wanting to mess with this shit‽" she said with a threatening interrobang, narrowing her non-patched eye.
I backed off a step. "I didn't mean any offense, ma'am.""Flavoured Carbonated Glucose Solution Supply & Affairs department, 13th floor."(more...)
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