Babel:Pd

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the dead encyclopedia that Ned can reanimate.
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Today's featured corpse

HeathJoker

COEUR D'COEURS, USA -- Several circus performers at the local Barry Sonnenfeld & Bryan Fuller Shrine Circus have died under mysterious circumstances. According to one such victim, a mime who was brought back from the dead for 60 seconds by a local piemaker named Ned, a man named Bryce Von Deenis threatened to kill several clowns for making a dirty limerick about his last name. (More)

Recently featured: Bureaucracy

Yesterday's featured corpse


Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured Gravity (film), featured on 19 August 2014. See the featured version.
Alain Robert, featured on 19 August 2013. See the featured version.
Doody, featured on 19 August 2012. See the featured version.

Did you know...

*...that ten out of ten cigarette manufacturers agree that Cancer is great?

Latest murders

Past murders...

Knockdoe

FOR THE KING

August 19: Battle of Knockdoe day

  • 1501 - The de Burghs and Fitzgeralds agree to have a glorious battle in Knockdoe next year.
  • 1502 - Ulick Burke too hung over to remember what day it is; Gerald Fitzgerald "super pissed" that he didn't show up.
  • 1503 - Gerald Fitzgerald too hung over to attend the battle; Ulick Burke calls him a damn hypocrite.
  • 1504 - The Battle of Knockdoe. A bunch of Normans and Irish chop each other to pieces, probably forever altering English history or something.
  • 1524 - Studies show that fewer than 1% of schoolchildren have ever heard of the Battle of Knockdoe.
  • 1692 - Salem witch trials: five witches are put to death, reducing the witch population of Salem by approximately 40%.
  • 1919 - Afghanistan gains independence from the United Kingdom, bringing an end to the Second Battle of Knockdoe.
  • 1944 - World War II: Paris liberated from German Occupation in what is considered a stunning re-enactment of the Battle of Knockdoe.
  • 1952 - Jonathan Frakes, actor who portrayed William Riker, born in order to commemorate the 448th anniversary of the Battle of Knockdoe.
  • 1991 - Collapse of the Soviet Union: Mikhail Gorbachev placed under house arrest while watching docudrama about the Battle of Knockdoe.
  • 1994 - Linus Pauling dies of massive vitamin C overdose in an event completely unrelated to the Battle of Knockdoe.
  • 2004 - Quinticentennial celebration of the Battle of Knockdoe; said to be "pretty fucking awesome" despite no one showing up.
  • 2005 - Lonely tourist kisses the Blarney Stone, ends up in extended makeout session.
  • 2010 - The parish of Lackagh, former site of the Battle of Knockdoe, found to be infested with stinking drunken Irishmen.
Pie of the Week
For the glory of her majesty
Help us bring back murder victims,
and plant the seeds of daisies.

Today's featured pie

Ahmadinejad-jihad-my-ride

Popular Al Jazeera reality series "Jihad My Ride" features, among other Muslim celebrities, Mahmoud "I-Wanna-Jihad" Ahmadinejad taking normal automobiles and making them "The Bomb".

Image Credit: RadicalX
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Recent Pie Recipes

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Minotaur | Cerberus | Cyrus the Great | Elvis Costello (light r/w) | DC-10 | VeggieTales (r/w) | Fox (TV channel) | Demographics | Covfefe (pictured) | George Lucas (r/w) | Galaxy (r/w) | Ipswich, Suffolk | Walt Disney (r/w) | Soylent (meal replacement) | Costa Coffee | John Brown (r/w) | Napoleon II | Emmanuel Macron | Scientist (r/w) |


More recent murders | Most wanted pies | Requested re-dos | Short recipes | Lonely piemakers | Pie Review | Try reanimating... | Daisies needing a push

Detective and Piemaker of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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