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welcum 2 uncyclopedia, da content-free encyclopedia dat steve/i can edit.


sophia haz inspierd us 2 wurk on 31,444 articles since opening in january 2005.

before editin, plz raed da writin guidelines n flamewar manual.

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Today's Featured Article -

Recently featured: Laughter

Yesterday's Featured Article - Laughter

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Laughter , or laughing, is a common bodily function which has been proven to be linked with several different phenomena. These range from wetting yourself like a idiot to ritualistic human sacrifice (possibly linked with Christians and other deity worshiping cultists).

The term "laughter" is thought to been coined in the late 1700's or possibly the early 1800's by Paul Laughing. Paul originally wanted the act of what we know today as laughing to be named carrying (after his wife Carrie). He remained adamant in this until approximately 6.15 PM when Paul returned home from work (Paul worked at the Ministry of Names and Verb Innovation) to tell his wife the news. After his wife explained to Paul that carrying was already a verb (meaning to carry), Paul renamed the verb to laughing (coincidentally Paul's surname). It took three weeks for the change to take effect; during this time people were 'carrying' at some of the worlds first jokes.

Laughter is widely considered to be the best medicine. But this theory has often been thrown into doubt - laughter has never really cured anything. Nurofen, cough syrup and chemotherapy cure - v ss. Laughter just makes all of these things seem a lot funnier, enabling others to laugh at your misfortune. When was the last time you laughed yourself better when you broke your arm in that skiing accident? I’m willing to bet never. Laughter is nothing more than an expression of amusement and should not be used medicinally to cure any ailments. (more...)

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Selected anniversaries

Weasel Stomping Day

September 24: Mudkip Appreciation Day

  • 3000 BC - Greek philosopher Atheises founds the Order of Dyslexic Atheists and declares as its motto "Thert isi thaer no doG!"
  • 1541 - Paracelsus, Swiss alchemist, passes away after being drained by a bitter rivalry with the alchemist Parafahrenheit.
  • 1789 - United States History: the position of Attorney General is established, to act as general over the army of attorneys raised during the Revolutionary War.
  • 1906 - U.S. President Theodore Roosevelt proclaims Devils Tower the nation's first National Monument after obsessively sculpting the rock formation in mashed potatoes.
  • 1939 - Adolf Hitler gets into a hedge dispute with his Polish neighbour.
  • 1944 - France is liberated by the allied forces. Riots ensue.
  • 1960 - Chuck Norris hires a Vietnamese plumber. Vietnam is still recovering.
  • 1991 - Jesus found alive and well in a Manchester crackhouse
  • 1993 - Karl Marx personal diaries discovered, Marxism apparently was just a wind up to bug the Americans.
  • 2003 - George Bush declares war on Legoland
  • 2007 - The last day of Adventalo, the gathering of millions of nerds awaiting the coming of the chiefus christ
  • 2008 - War Veteran, Big Bird committed suicide after receiving hate mail for accidentally sinking china when he flushed the toilet
  • 2009 - All 8 followers of the new found religion Walmartism are sentenced to death after reports of attacks on rivalry gangs The "Food Lion Elite"
  • 2010 - United States of America takes over Japan Renaming it Coca Cola
  • 2022 - Michael Jackson sues himself for sexual assault and wins. He celebrates by sexually assaulting himself again.
  • 2342 - Somebody gets fired on their birthday from school.
  • 2351 - Walmart declares war on Islam. Millions die.

archived aniverserys

In the news

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Did you know...

From Uncyclopedia's biggest morons:


raed mor

writer of da munth

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



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