Babel:Gv

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Revision as of 08:46, October 29, 2011 by Sockpuppet of an unregistered user (talk | contribs)

(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to: navigation, search

Ahoy, me hearty and welcome to Pirateopedia (formally HMS Uncyclopedia), the duty-free encyclopedia that pirates can edit Arghh!


Davey Jones has inspired us to sink and pillage 30,551 ships since we set sail in January 2005.

Before running out your guns, please read the ships charter and the pirates code or you'll be Walking the Plank.
If you scurvy dogs still are still a bit confused then speak to polly(sqwark, Pieces of Eight, Pieces of Eight)

Buried Treasure:

Bilge Rats | Games | Marine Technology | Pirates | Grog | Coherent
Most Succesful Pirates | LLoyds List's | Other Ships...


Hand grenade
A typical hand grenade used against tanks in WWII.
Vote for featured image

Today's Featured Article - Death

HumanSkull

Death is the process by which live things complete the transition to becoming dead things. Traditionally, this is achieved by ceasing all biological functions and falling to the floor as a lifeless pile of jelly. The generally agreed procedure at this point is to attract hundreds of insects and decompose horribly. There are very few departures from this formula and, given that everybody who goes through it is dead, this is unlikely to change any time soon.

Death has been the subject of extensive debate over the years. There are hundreds of competing theories for what happens afterwards. These range from being reborn to absolutely nothing happening whatsoever and entering a state of eternal nothingness — an eternal oblivion. The state of eternal oblivion is easily experienced by taking a stopping train to Aberystwyth, or by inviting a plumber to explain exactly what he is doing to the ball-cock.

It is common for people to have funerals after they die. These funerals are where friends of the deceased mourn their passing, before descending into petty squabbles and litigation over the deceased person's will. Death is often described as being the ultimate leveller. As Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius observed in 180 AD: "It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live." Such a quotation is sure to enliven any post-bereavement repast. (more...)

Recently featured: Death - Ernest Hemingway - RAF Packington

Yesterday's Featured Article - Ernest Hemingway

Hemtolstoy

He lived. Primarily in the first half of the 20th century. Then for a while in the last half. He wrote things (such as books), drank things (such as alcohol), and shot things (such as his face). He had a beard. He married more than his fair share of rich women. He once owned a tiny Jewish slave named Windemere. Let us examine this complex man and his complex works. Without neglecting his complexity.

Ernest Hemingway was born in the United States. His father was an Amish magician. His mother was not. He cried a lot when he was a baby. Babies cry a lot. Sometimes it is because their pants are heavy. Sometimes it is because they cannot have fine French wine. Even as a baby Hemingway could tell a good wine from a bad one.

Hemingway cried. He did not have decent French wine. He would have it later. But right now he did not have it. The house did not have indoor plumbing. It would have it later, when Ernest was ten. When he turned ten he would be fascinated with the hot and cold taps. He would call it a Big Two-Heated River. He would wish the taps would pour out whiskey and absinthe. But they did not. Besides, his house did not have plumbing yet. While he was looking for a restroom, he would often shoot things. (More...)

You can vote for your favorite Pirate to be avoid the handmans noose.

More of the best Pirates from the good ship Pirateopedia


What were we getting up too in past years, Arghhhh!

Obese

April 25: National Obesity Appreciation Day

  • 0 - The world's first April 25th was celebrated. Nostradamus predicts the world's first April 26th to occur a day later. He later predicts the birth of Jimbo Wales and the creation of Wikipedia, but no one believes him due to the idea of both being so stupid.
  • 908 - A horde of plus-sized Vikings raid the east coast of Britain and set up a new IKEA store.
  • 1301 - First known use of the phrase "I don't give a shit" thought to have been said somewhere around London, England.
  • 1607 - Dutch Commando Dykes led by Hans Solo destroy the anchored Spanish fleet.
  • 1847 - The last survivors of the Donner Party are out of the wilderness. Shortly after, the first McDonners resturant opens. First item on the menu: McRib.
  • 1862 - The worlds first battery operated fork is created; two million die during its first use.
  • 1859 - Ground is broken for the Suez Canal. Israelis and Egyptians immediately begin fighting over who owns the hole.
  • 1915 - Australians invade Turkey, only to piss off next year.
  • 1918 - Turks invade Australia, but have stayed permanantly to drive taxis.
  • 1921 - Fattest US president in history, William Howard Taft, eats a steak.
  • 1950 - The Michelin Man Ii born.
  • 1955 - The first McDonalds is opened.
  • 1956 - "Obesity" is a recognized health problem.
  • 1957 - Overweight Appreciation day is upgraded to Obesity Appreciation Day, whilst Overweight Appreciation Day changes to 25th December.
  • 1986 - First annual (and only) all-night Soviet Power Plant Workers' Tetris competition held.
  • 1990 - Astronauts deploying the Hubble Space Telescope drop it on the way out the door, knocking it slightly out of focus.
  • 2003 - The International Federation of Dentists cancel all appointments for the month of August, in protest that floss and tooth picks, are not bar-coded.

Archived doings

What be worrying the Land Lubbers



Pirate Times


Arghh, I'll wagger you didn't know that...

From Uncyclopedia's roughest captains:

  • ...that Kitten Huffing is a popular, though controversial, alternative to street drugs such as skag and crank?


Read More

Pirate of the Month and Swabbie of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
UnNews Logo Potato (No text) UnNews
The news source on crack
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
Undictionary Logo Text Undictionary
The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
UnTunes2 UnTunes
Where noisy things can live and prosper
Game-Logo notext Games
Another way to waste time
Gorillatrans HowTo
Instructions and guides for anything and everything
Unbooks-logo notext UnBooks
Content-free books
Unquotable-logo-en vector notext Unquotable
Useless misquotes galore
Uncycloversity-logo-notext Uncycloversity
If it makes sense, we don't want it
UnPoetialogo UnPoetia
Poetry for people who hate poetry
Undebate logo UnDebate
Debating all the irrelevant issues
UnScripts UnScripts
We can ruin stage and film too
Why Why?
Don't make me explain it to you twice
UnReviewsLogo UnReviews
We'll tell you why things suck
Uncyclomedia Commons notext UnCommons
Broken media repository


Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 30,551 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext
Uncyclopedia
English
United Kingdom
W17x11 30649
Desciclopédia
Português
Brazil
35457
アンサイクロペディア
日本語
Japan
16220
Nonsensopedia
Polski
Poland
W17x11 20323
Nonciclopedia
Italiano
Italy
W17x11 12328
Wiki it
1dÉ
Désencyclopédie
Français
France
W17x11 7257
Inciclopedia
Español
Spain
W17x11 8775
偽基百科
正體中文
Taiwan
5328
Uncyclopedia.de
Deutsch
Germany
W17x11 5520
Hikipedia
Suomi
Finland
6804
Hikipedia
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on August 12, 2011.
cy:
If you find Pirateopedia or its sista projects amusing, please consider making a donation to help the victims of the War on Terra:

For Pirate related chat, see This instructional pirated video.

Protected by the Law of the Sea, and an elite crew of Ghost Piratess.

Personal tools
projects