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Ahoy, me hearty and welcome to Pirateopedia (formally HMS Uncyclopedia), the duty-free encyclopedia that pirates can edit Arghh!

Davey Jones has inspired us to sink and pillage 31,206 ships since we set sail in January 2005.

Before running out your guns, please read the ships charter and the pirates code or you'll be Walking the Plank.
If you scurvy dogs still are still a bit confused then speak to polly(sqwark, Pieces of Eight, Pieces of Eight)

Buried Treasure:

Bilge Rats | Games | Marine Technology | Pirates | Grog | Coherent
Most Succesful Pirates | LLoyds List's | Other Ships...


DaVinci's Hewlett-Packard printer was to be the undoing of his most famous work, resulting in what art scholars have termed the "Mono Lisa."
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WikiMeet London - Jimbo talks

The poor, meme-ridden "comedy" website Uncyclopedia is the stuff of Internet legend and infamy. The site, which is thought to have originated in 1860 as an American imperialist tool for global domination, is now a multi-national effort and is seen as the best of its kind by some. Uncyclopedia currently specializes in tedious mockery of perceived competitors and petty in-fighting, with much of the content seen as mass-produced junk. Yet, there remains a peculiar fondness for some of the articles by fanatics. The site has, however, been perceived as a waste of server space by its host, the evil Wikia Empire.

This is a view that has sparked a substantial shift from the site's satirical aspirations, causing it to instead redirect its resources into pathetic racial slurs and endless references to Nazis. This is compounded by the need for articles that appease a "softer consensus."

The site was founded by billionaire entrepreneur and media tycoon Oscar Wilde sometime in the late nineteenth century. The early Uncyclopedia was not the impressive effort it is today. It all began when Wilde would often write puerile childish jokes on scraps of paper to his male friends to encourage more "intimate relations." The internet was, conveniently, invented in 1990s and allowed Wilde to pursue the same method through technology and thus he was able to extend his efforts globally.

Oscar Wilde's efforts were spotted by Sophia Lauren whilst on vacation. After hours of debate, they decided to found an internet site that would allow for Oscar's whoring and Sophia's showcasing of talent to take place in one convenient location. Thus, in 2005, a crumby website was born and a whole new reason to live for the unemployed was broadcast to the world.(more...)

You can vote for your favorite Pirate to be avoid the handmans noose.

More of the best Pirates from the good ship Pirateopedia

What were we getting up too in past years, Arghhhh!


Example of a shiny ass, on the hampster!

October 3: National Day of Retrofitting Your Hamster with a Metal Ass (Japan)

  • -1195 AD - The King of Persia launches a surprise attack on Rome with their new and improved rugs. Cesar Chavez's army crushes the attacks with a combined Pirate and Ninja fleet.
  • 1024 - Viagra cookies are invented by Superman and Elton John.
  • 1422 - First recorded use of the word 'come' to mean orgasm.
  • 1423 - First recorded joke of a man making a pun on the word 'come'.
  • 1645 - Roman blacksmith is first to create cast iron ass for his five year old son's pet hamster.
  • 1915 - Steel prices skyrocket due to the large number of pet hamsters owned in Japan.
  • 1928 - Shiny chromed hamster asses are all the rage this year.
  • 1929 - Hamster asses can now be programmed to "Jitterbug".
  • 1952 - Due to shortages of metal after World War II, hamsters are forced to wear discarded cutlery.
  • 1978 - Aluminuim asses are proved to give greater power to weight ratio for the hamster.
  • 1982 - Discovered that uranium hamster ass was "probably not a very good idea".
  • 1983 - Giant, rabid, razor-toothed uranium-assed hamsters install metal asses to the entire human population of Tokyo.
  • 1988 - Geroge H.W. Bush is voted in as the first President to ever have a pet hamster with a metal ass.
  • 1990 - David Hasselhoff reunited Germany by pissing on the Berlin Wall
  • 1995 - OJ Simspon did it
  • 2004 - PETA activists blockade McDonalds fast-food outlets to protest against the cruel, barbaric process of retrofitting hamsters with metal asses.
  • 2015 - Apple creates the iLife, therefore having a lifespan of 6 months before something newer and better than you is released.
  • 2017 - Newly Elected Hamster Commander-in-Chief 'Fuzzy' proclaims "all hamsters with metal asses to be 'out' and all hamsters with funny fruit hats to be 'in.'"
  • 2020 - Osama Bin Laden comes back as a metal-assed zombie and is arrested by PETA police for hurting a hamster in deep Afghanistan

Archived doings

What be worrying the Land Lubbers


Recent Second Front Pages: GreeceHillary!UK election

Pirate Times

Arghh, I'll wagger you didn't know that...

From Uncyclopedia's roughest captains:

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Pirate of the Month and Swabbie of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.

Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!

It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
UnNews Logo Potato (No text) UnNews
The news source on crack
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
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The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
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Where noisy things can live and prosper
Game-Logo notext Games
Another way to waste time
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Instructions and guides for anything and everything
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Content-free books
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Useless misquotes galore
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If it makes sense, we don't want it
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Poetry for people who hate poetry
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Debating all the irrelevant issues
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We can ruin stage and film too
Why Why?
Don't make me explain it to you twice
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We'll tell you why things suck
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Broken media repository

Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 31,206 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
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United Kingdom
W17x11 30557
W17x11 16666
W17x11 13518
Wiki it
W17x11 8364
W17x11 10392
W17x11 Unknown
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on September 3, 2014.
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