Babel:Falwell

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Revision as of 03:43, May 15, 2008 by TheLedBalloon (talk | contribs)

(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to: navigation, search

Welcome to Falwellapedia,

The official Encyclopedia of Liberty University.
31,099 articles in (American) English

Beginner's Guide · The Five Solas · Style · Questions · Help · Charity

Categories · Biblical Canon · A–Z index

Welcome to Falwellapedia

The literal and inerrant encyclopedia you can trust.
Falwell-650

Falwellapedia has over 10,000 educational, clean, and concise entries, including exactly 66 canonical texts. There have been over 11,600,000 page views and over 172,000 page edits, including 171,699 reversions of heretical edits.

Jerry's Daily Sermon:

"Grown men should not be having sex with prostitutes unless they are married to them." Crossfire (17 May 1997)

Daily Historical Falwell Quote:

"Han, Han. If only you hadn't had to dump that shipment of spice. I just can't make exceptions. Where would I be if every pilot who smuggled for me dumped their shipment at the first sign of an Imperial starship? It's not good business."

On Han Solo's loss of Jerry the Hutt's illegal cargo (Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, Special Conservative Edition, 1997)

Please read our rules here, and how we differ from the too-liberal Conservapedia here.

Today's Featured Article - Bill Cosby

Lil bill

Bill Cosby is a well-respected comedienne, actor, writer, activist, and an alleged serial rapist. Alleged, meaning he didn't do it. Cosby got his first big break on the San Francisco comedy scene, where he developed his unique sense of humor and did not commit a single sexual assault, despite what those lying whores say. He began his acting career with a starring role on the 1960s television series "I Spy", where he and Robert Culp pointed out things they saw with their little eyes and did not drug and rape anybody. There were no charges filed, and there's no proof Cosby did anything. I Spy became a hit, and Cosby became a household name, dethroning Sidney Poitier as the least threatening black man in America. You don't get the title of least threatening black man in America by raping people. Just saying.

Cosby's success continued in the 70s with the children's cartoon Fat Albert And The Cosby Kids, which sought to entertain children as well as teach them. Saying you want the man who created that show to get locked up for crimes he didn't commit is the same thing as saying you hate children. In the 80s, Cosby reached the height of his popularity with The Cosby Show, which I can no longer watch on TV Land because a bunch of sluts decided to tarnish Cosby's good name. When I could watch it, I got to see the adventures of Cliff Huxtable and his family who loved him and who would never turn their backs on him like America turned their backs on Cosby. I wish more people were like the Huxtables.

In the only bad move of his career, Cosby appeared in the 1987 spy movie Leonard Part 6, which was so bad Cosby himself told people not to watch it, because he has integrity and would never lie to the public. (more...)

Yesterday's Featured Article - UnNews:U.S. corners Palestine rubble futures market

GazaWater1

SAFED, Palestine - U.S. President Barack Obama signed an agreement with Palestinean President Mahmoud Abbas today to trade in the processing of the region's urban rubble, having failed to reach any agreement to stop creating it.

The so-called Trans-Palestinian Partnership will gradually phase out tariffs, duties, inspections, and the role of the U.S. Congress in the movement of Grade A broken concrete blocks across national boundaries.

It was non-alcoholic beverages and mild gratitude to Allah as Mr. Abbas and Mr. Obama publically declared that a Palestine/US economic future "is buried firmly in the trenchant rubble that plagues our streets."

In a candid interview on Israel TV, Mr. Obama said he has thrown in the towel on a peace agreement between Israel and a Palestinian state, as he could hardly get his head around the Wikipedia entry, let alone reason with Abbas. Mr. Obama said at least all parties were better off with a financial agreement in the raw-materials sector.

The employment rate in Palestine also increased by 0.6%, as tens of Palestinians rushed to join the President's new "Palestinian Rubble Liberation Union (PRLU)". At the same time, a "Fatah Debris and General Workers Union" was formed to protect the PRLU Union members from the PRLU, and a "Hamas Union of Fragments" to protect the already established Islamic Rubble Movement. (more...)

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured Soma, featured on 7 July 2012. See the featured version.
Uh oh!, featured on 7 July 2011. See the featured version.
UnNews:Warrant sent out for the arrest of the Wonderpets, featured on 7 July 2010. See the featured version.

Breaking News

Gunsandgod

"You can have my gun when you pry it from my cold, resurrected hands."

On this day...

July 7: Misleading Hyperlink Day

Featured picture

RacismProtest

BNP rally.

Image Credit: Digi
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Recent Articles

Boeing 737 | Teleology | Sergei Eisenstein | Interstellar (movie) | Bee | Comcast | Green Party (UK) | Lily Savage | Microsoft PowerPoint | Warranty | Unicode | Hillsdale College | Frank Miller | United Kingdom general election, 2015 | Sault Ste. Marie | Chuck E. Cheese's | Metadata | Mutant | Jamie Bryson | Darkhad | Arthur (show) (rw) | Fart rape | Tom Brady (rw) | New meat from the Surprise Me! Spring Festival: Ted Cruz | Box-spring | Chamber pot | Coming soon | First-past-the-post voting | Hurricane | Noble gases


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
UnNews Logo Potato (No text) UnNews
The news source on crack
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
Undictionary Logo Text Undictionary
The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
UnTunes2 UnTunes
Where noisy things can live and prosper
Game-Logo notext Games
Another way to waste time
Gorillatrans HowTo
Instructions and guides for anything and everything
Unbooks-logo notext UnBooks
Content-free books
Unquotable-logo-en vector notext Unquotable
Useless misquotes galore
Uncycloversity-logo-notext Uncycloversity
If it makes sense, we don't want it
UnPoetialogo UnPoetia
Poetry for people who hate poetry
Undebate logo UnDebate
Debating all the irrelevant issues
UnScripts UnScripts
We can ruin stage and film too
Why Why?
Don't make me explain it to you twice
UnReviewsLogo UnReviews
We'll tell you why things suck
Uncyclomedia Commons notext UnCommons
Broken media repository


Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 31,099 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext
Uncyclopedia
English
United Kingdom
W17x11 30557
Desciclopédia
Português
Brazil
45286
アンサイクロペディア
日本語
Japan
18180
Nonsensopedia
Polski
Poland
W17x11 16666
Nonciclopedia
Italiano
Italy
W17x11 13518
Wiki it
1dÉ
Désencyclopédie
Français
France
W17x11 8364
Inciclopedia
Español
Spain
W17x11 10392
偽基百科
正體中文
Taiwan
5720
Uncyclopedia.de
Deutsch
Germany
W17x11 Unknown
Hikipedia
Suomi
Finland
7614
Hikipedia
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on September 3, 2014.

Protected by Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Savior, and an elite clan of Baptists.

Personal tools
projects