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Northern translation:Ey up luv! Get yers arse on t' Uncyclopedia, before Tom, Dick or Arry do or ye gunner get a thrapin'!

Good Queen Bess has inspired us to work on 32,214 articles since opening in January 2005.


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Colonisations for the week include Canada, Newfoundland, Australia and New Zealand. Rule Britannia!


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Mickeys - the drug of choice for today's trendy ravers.
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Lest we forget

Sophia-red

November 20: Almighty Sophia Day

  • 500 BCE - Greeks invent philosophy(filos=love, (of) Sophia).
  • 479 BCE - Sophia invents boobs , millions stare.
  • 284 - Dodecahedron becomes Roman Emperor.
  • c.350 - The Church of Saint Sophia is built in Bulgaria, the name rendered as "Sofia" based on cyrillic transliteration. Other churches would soon be built in Mu, Krakatau (Krakatoa) Island, Antarctica, Turkey, California (Los Angeles), earning the wrath of Cthulhu followers.
  • 403 - The Hagia Sophia is completed in Constantinople. Her majestic domes are just huge.
  • 1453 - Turks capture Constantinople and rename it "Is Stan Bull", adding minarets as phallic symbols around the Hagia Sophia.
  • 1910 - Mexican Revolution begins. Mexicans get some Madero and Porfirio Díaz is not amused at all.
  • 1910 - (about 1 PM): Siesta in Mexico. Revolution is postponed.
  • 1917 - World War I, Battle of Cambrai begins: the Allies make surprise attack on the German trenches while the soldiers are transfixed on Sophia's Invention.
  • 1950 - Sophia Loren enters puberty. The Acme Hand Lotion Company sees its stock quadruple almost overnight.
  • 1958 - Sophia films Boy on a Dolphin. Years later, Michael Jackson will purchase rights for the remake.
  • 1988 - Pac-Man and Miss Pac-Man wed amid concerns over their identical surnames.
  • 2028 - After 40 years of marriage, Pac-Man tragically dies whilst at work, Mrs Pac-Man disbands the Pac-Man series of games. Forum riots ensue.

Ye Royal Archives


Paddington Blair's word for today is
procrastination
Try to use it in your conversations. Knowledge is power.

United Empire Loyalist of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



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