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Faneuil Hall

Town meeting is the municipal legislature in many towns in New England. Town meeting has been called "the purest form of democracy," pure although none of the ingredients are refined. Students of the contaminated version called Congress can restore their faith by studying democracy at full "strength."

Democracy is the form of government where "the majority rules." Americans have historically been giddy about democracy, as they enjoy a system where fifty-percent-plus-one of the voters can have their way on propositions such as:

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Did you know...

*...that Former President Bush prefers his Tuskegee airmen with a side of risotto and mushrooms?
  • ...that since haste makes waste, and slow and steady wins the race, it follows that everybody who loses a race must therefore be charged with littering?
  • ...that Former President Bush prefers his Tuskegee airmen with a side of risotto and mushrooms?
  • ...that since haste makes waste, and slow and steady wins the race, it follows that everybody who loses a race must therefore be charged with littering?
  • ...that Former President Bush prefers his Tuskegee airmen with a side of risotto and mushrooms?
  • ...that since haste makes waste, and slow and steady wins the race, it follows that everybody who loses a race must therefore be charged with littering?
  • ...that Former President Bush prefers his Tuskegee airmen with a side of risotto and mushrooms?

In the news

On this day...

September 23: Take a Venomous Animal to Work Day, also National Australian Pavlova is Ours Day.
  • 1143 - Pope Innoocent II rejoins God after taking his wife to work.
  • 1554 - Francisco Vasquez de Coronado, Spanish explorer, dies after taking a rattlesnake to work.
  • 1774 - Pope Clement XIV (b. 1705) expires after taking a lionfish to work.
  • 1972 - The French word "capitulate" is added to the OED (the French themselves have been using the word since 600 BC).
  • 1974 - Two whole words, both alike in dignity, "Capulet" and "Montague", are added to the OED.
  • 1979 - Olympics held in Wigan for the second time.
  • 1986 - Ozzy "Ozzy" Osbourne catches a crazy train. Is late for work. Rioting ensues.
  • 1989 - Songwriter Irving Berlin dies when the platypus he brings to work strikes him with its venomous leg spines.
  • 1990 - First "cow catapult" launch observed in controversial computer game "Nuclear War".
  • 1995 - Samantha T. is born as a baby
  • 2002 - Revolution in Webbrowserland leads to crowning of Pheonix I by Mozilla rebels. Fighting start of Firefox War.
  • 2006 - A homeless man in Australia is beaten sensless by a giant used tampon. Police reports show that the tampon was 'Carefree'.
  • 2007 - Rhys Jones is caught in a drive-by on the way to a Used concert, his collapse to the ground causes the biggest earthquake on human record which in turn brings the end of the world (doomsday)
  • 2008 - Australia freaks out due to apocalypse, but then realises false alarm that it is only a duststorm.
  • 2009 - Australia rejoices as government scientists prove that New Zealand forged pavlova recipe, meaning that Australians now have another reason to mock their cousins across the Tasman.

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Grue crossing

The Grue Crossing signs have proven to be an effective way to prepare drivers for an encounter.

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Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



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