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GoatseWouldyou


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<MARQUEE BEHAVIOR=SLIDE>Befor u check out my kewl homepage you might wanna read about me or look at photos from my sweet 16 b-day celebration.
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BREAKING NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!! MY WEBPAGE HAS BEEN REDESIGNED!!!!!

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MADE WITH FRONT PAGE 95

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Today's Featured Article - Super-delegate

MP JFK

A Super-delegate, in the American political system, is a delegate, especially to a national Presidential nominating convention, who is endowed with super-powers. Although both the Democratic Party and the Republican Party like to go through the motions of soliciting voter input on who should be the Party's Presidential candidate, actual voters are, to put it mildly, morons. Frequently, the Party must contrive to both thank them for their valued contribution and hit the figurative Revert button.

The hoi polloi tirelessly coalesce around a candidate with inspiring new ideas, be it Bernie Sanders with his untested concept of socialism, or Ron Paul with his assertions that American tourism caused the Middle East to erupt until Jews had to dynamite the World Trade Center during the September 11 attacks. When such candidates gain traction, insiders (the "party-archy") need to turn away from the hoi polloi, consult with other polloi, and pick a candidate who is more electable, electability judged by persons who cannot persuade anyone of any actual idea. (more...)

Recently featured: Super-delegate

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June 27: International Day of Rest from International Holidays - USA (res.)

  • 153 - Shuffle walking hits mainstream. Shoe makers rejoice.
  • 476 - Odoacer sacks Rome in response to not being invited to the Senate's toga party.
  • 1617 - The Hapsburg Dynasty is created after the 1st Dynasty Warriors set in feudal Austria (later games in the series include Dynasty Warriors Feudal South Africa, DW VII Feudal Libya. Fans have expressed an interest in having a DW set in feudal Japan).
  • 1992 - Fedor Emelianenko defeats Terrorism at a twenty minute decision in PRIDE.
  • 1976 - The Farrah flip-falls out of style in most Middle Eastern countries, except strangely in Oman.
  • 1980 - Freddie Mercury finally gets to ride his bicycle.
  • 2004 - Krispy Kreme invents the first Glazed atom bomb, but fat hungry people lick all the glaze off.
  • 2021 - All attempts to logically explain how computers really work fail, and numerous experts agree that technology is simply magic.

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David Gerard. What needs to be said about this extraordinary person? He lived life to the fullest. He scaled Everest and swam the Marianas. He piloted a kayak through the rivers of the Yukon with naught but a broken compass to guide him. Now he sits in a nursing home: Alzheimer's has rotted his brain to such an extent that he no longer recognizes himself as the WotM-winning author of Voice Chat, Fountainhead Earth and X Window System.


GoatseWouldyou
Noobaward

If a picture is worth a thousand words, those on Noob of the Month MoneySign's image gallery are good for an average of at least 940 words apiece (he loses points because his Taste picture offends the Greeks). Classic Money highlights include Hazard Dogs and the tuberiffic logo for UnNews, which MS constructed entirely out of string, spittle and beer can tabs.


Congratulations to Rcmurphy, our Uncyclopedian of the Year!


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