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MADE WITH FRONT PAGE 95
Today's Featured Article - Worcester, England
Worcester (pronounced "Woo-ster"), also known locally as "Wu, Glorious Wu", is a city and high-street consumer colony of Worcestershire, in the West Middle countryside of England. Often overshadowed by its noisy neighbour Birmingham, Worcester is mother to a brand of porcelain, Worcestershire sauce, and a Royal brothel, and was the setting for the blockbusting grand finale of the English Civil War.
Worcester is twinned with the Vatican City, due to its importance to the Catholic faith as the site where a virgin swan laid a clutch of eggs, which Pope Boniface IV ate in an omelette. The eggs were later depicted in a series of works commissioned by the Vatican and painted by religious artist Salvador Dali. (more...)
Yesterday's Featured Article -
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edit Facts about me
- ...that in a world where movie trailers are crucial to a film's success... one man will provide his voice in innumerable trailers?
- ...that the Japanese have a saying: "A man cannot read the same Wikipedia page twice"? The pages are constantly being edited, and the act of reading it will make you a different person. Therefore, when a man goes back to re-read it, both the text and the man have been changed.
edit History Channel
October 26: International Time Travel Day
- 1492 - Christopher Columbus invents herpes to pass the time on tedious transatlantic voyages.
- 1701 - Philadelphia, Pennsylvania incorporated as an American city.
- 1776 - The first Continental Congress adjourns in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.
- 1805 - Citizens, using stolen British documents, develop simple time travel and travel back to 1701 and eradicate Philadelphia in order to save the East Coast from what would be present Philadelphia. Make second stop a bit farther east and remove area of future New Jersey for good measure as well. All is peaceful.
- 1822 - The Rock discovers the secret to time travel, goes back in time to kill Hitler, only to realize Hitler wasn't born yet.
- 1917 - The first Lifetime limited warranty is created when Congress passes the Broken Stamp Act of 1917.
- 1921 - Highlander comes forward a billion years and impales Sean Connery on a parking meter, revenge ensues.
- 1944 - Albert Einstein and Nikola Tesla invent a time machine by accident. They travel to 1996 and meet Elton John, The Spice Girls and Bill Clinton's Cigar. They promptly return home, dismantle the time machine and deny it ever happened. It has become known amongst Conspiracy Theorists as the Philadelphia Experiment
- 1946 - Enjoy whale meat day (Japan)
- 1969 - The 69 sex position is invented by Christopher Lloyd.
- 1980 - The 1981 DMC DeLorean, which is later used as a time machine, is released.
- 1985 - Dr. Emmett Brown invents a time machine out of a DeLorean
- 1988 - Bill and Ted build a time machine out of a phone booth for access to space porn.
- 1988 - Pre-Emo angsty teenage outsider, Donnie Darko, avoids being killed by a time-traveling jet engine by sleeping on a golf course.
- 1988 - Pre-Emo angsty teenage outsider, Donnie Darko, is killed by a time-traveling jet engine.
- 1994 - First Time Cop trained; turns into serial killer, but accidently destroys own grandmother, creating a paradox called Doctor Who.
- 1996 - The less popular 96 sex position is invented after the birth of Jesus.
- 1999 - The 99 sex position is invented. Wait -- How does that work?
- 2000 - It is discovered that Rosa Parks was actually a middle-aged caucasian man named Hank.
- 2001 - First Time Traveller's Convention Held in New York. No future being reported.
- 2003 - Goverment develops a time machine, George W. Bush travels to the past to party with his past self and Hitler.
- 2006 - Some angsty teenager has an internal conflict with herself about stuff only Col. Sherman Potter and his son Harry Potter would understand.
edit Articles from today's Daily Hostage Negotiator
- 5G "right around the corner" (pictured)
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Count Dooku (r/w) | HowTo:Help the Green Party | Impressionism (pictured) | Millennials | Georges Danton | Yaroslavl | Methodists | Strauss and Howe | Cartoon Network (r/w) | Billy Joel (r/w) | Tim Berners-Lee | Saturday Night Fever | Anarchy | Theresa May | Tim Farron | Benedict Cumberbatch | Melania Trump | Courtney Love | Pokémon Go | Pets | Lapwing | Brexit | Glastonbury Festival | Dog (r/w) | Stradbroke (r/w) | Hotline (disambiguation) | Worcester, England | Canon (camera) | Rolls Royce | Accident | BMW
David Gerard. What needs to be said about this extraordinary person? He lived life to the fullest. He scaled Everest and swam the Marianas. He piloted a kayak through the rivers of the Yukon with naught but a broken compass to guide him. Now he sits in a nursing home: Alzheimer's has rotted his brain to such an extent that he no longer recognizes himself as the WotM-winning author of Voice Chat, Fountainhead Earth and X Window System.
If a picture is worth a thousand words, those on Noob of the Month MoneySign's image gallery are good for an average of at least 940 words apiece (he loses points because his Taste picture offends the Greeks). Classic Money highlights include Hazard Dogs and the tuberiffic logo for UnNews, which MS constructed entirely out of string, spittle and beer can tabs.
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