Babel:2006

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Nobody cares is a policy employed by dictators, despots, democracy, the general public, and wiki administration.

The school of thought began when somebody wanted something and nobody cared. This is thought to have occurred sometime between Ancient Mesopotamia and the Fall of Rome, so we'll say Ancient Greece. Nobody cares enough to find out for sure.

Somebody probably started it, with authority probably, so let's say Zeus. He was the ultimate god and ruled over the people or something and then the people weren't happy. Zeus decided that nobody cared and screwed a goat.

Then there was Rome and the Romans didn't like Christians. The Christians wanted to live, but nobody cared so they made them fight lions to the death.

Then Rome fell and the people needed a stable existence, but nobody cared and the Dark Ages were born.

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Selected anniversaries

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That's no moon...

January 30: International Cliche Day

  • A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away.... - The evil armies attack, and only a hero can save the light side.
  • Once upon a time - A young girl, living in poverty, met Prince Charming and they lived happily ever after.
  • 50BC - Nero plays the violin while Rome burns.
  • 42- Something happens.
  • 69- Two people have sex in a kinky position.
  • 1110 - Better to have loved and lost than to have never loved before.
  • 1111 - Besides, there's plenty more fish in the sea.
  • 1268 - A battle of epic proportions occurs. The bad guys lose and the Half-good guys win. Our heroes from the future find themselves trapped in this age of rape and plundering, and just as they are to be executed for public fornication, the funky professor back in the future figures out a way to save them, and bring them back.
  • 1337- Awesome shit happens.
  • 1859 - Abraham Lincoln fights his evil twin.
  • 1875 - Oscar Wilde says something that touches each and every one of our hearts.
  • 1939-1945 The bad guys are a bunch of Nazis. Wow, that's really original.
  • 1945 - President Truman considers bombing Japan with the A-bomb. "It's crazy", he says, "but just crazy enough to work."
  • 1960 - The first American movie is released involving guns, aliens, tits, love-triangles, dinosaurs, Mars, and a young misfit whose strange talent is needed to save the world.
  • 1979 - The Japanese release their first movie, game, book, and porno where key characters die for shock-value. Survival rate of Japanese characters lowers to 10%
  • 2003 - America liberates Iraqistan to bring freedom to the Arabs. The liberal media rejects patriotism.
  • 2006 - The anniversary list once again becomes a chat room.
  • 2007 - You wake up, and it was all a dream.
  • 2010 - Aliens invade, but they have a hidden weakness which is discovered just in time.
  • 2011 - Aliens invade again. Different aliens. We shoot the mother ship with a one in a million chance of it hitting. It hits.
  • 2017 - A rag-tag misfit with his own set of rules is persuaded to help the police track down the kitten ripper bandit in order to buy his own freedom.
  • 2101 - War was beginning.
  • 2242 - Uruguay changes its name to UrJustinBeiberTwilightfagharrypotterbananasplitlover
  • 2407 - Super Mario made an apperance in his 1,309th video game entitled "Mario saves the Princess, AGAIN." It never gets old does it?

666

  • +9000 - Vegeta finally gets the même about his catchphrase

Archived Anniversaries </div>

Today's word of the day is
retro
Try to use it in your conversations. Knowledge is power.

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Did you know...

  • ... that it has been proven beyond reasonable doubt that the reason for 50% of modern marriages ending in divorce is because those people try to go to IKEA together for a relaxing afternoon?

Do you care...

  • ...that my dad reproduces asexually, thus making me impervious to yo momma jokes?


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Writer and Noob of the Month

Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



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