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Today's Featured Article - Mystery Science Theater 3000 (re-imagining)

Mst4

Mystery Science Theater 3000 (re-imagining) refers to a "re-imagined" universe that debuted in 2003 and was based on the 1990s television franchise of the same name. While sharing the same name and general premise of the original program, the new Mystery Science Theater 3000 aims for a more "realistic" depiction of humans trapped in space and forced to watch bad movies. The new Mystery Science Theater 3000 is grounded in current events, and several episodes have made allusions (both subtle and explicit) to real-life issues, including depression, suicidal thoughts and the whole Tyler Perry enterprise.

Each episode begins with the following crawl:

The Satellite of Love was created by man
It was shot into space by mad scientists
They send it cheesy movies
And they have a plan

A janitor, a temp worker and an engineer -- each with a dark, terrifying secret -- wake up one morning within a spaceship. Before they can react, they are shot into space and placed in geosynchronous orbit over the South Atlantic. After reaching maximum altitude, the three -- referred to as "Robinson," "Servo" and "Gypsy" --receive a message from a mysterious corporation called "Gizmonics," telling them they have been brought together for an "experiment", and instructing them to enter a nearby movie theater. (more...)

Yesterday's Featured Article -

Featured today, a long long time ago

Featured Pocket pussy, featured on 24 May 2013. See the featured version.
Kwanzaa, featured on 24 May 2012. See the featured version.
Muammar Gaddafi, featured on 24 May 2011. See the featured version.

DID Y0U KN0W...

Sdsad
  • ...that grave robbing accounts for 1/3 of the average Romanian yearly income? (pictured)
  • ...that Former President Bush prefers his Tuskegee airmen with a side of risotto and mushrooms?
  • ...that the amount of cats in the area is directly proportionate to the distance from the Hot Dog factory?
  • ...that en passant is actually French for "inventing new rules as you go along?"
  • ...that a drummer is someone who hangs out with musicians?
  • ...that to the untrained ear, John Aglethorpe's Ode to the Monotony of Life may simply sound like one continuous, monotonous tone, but the song is actually composed mostly of alterations between the A sharp and B flat notes tied together?
  • ...that this statement is not not not not not not not not not not not possibly confusing to no one somewhere right now?

IN 7H3 N3W5

0N 7HI5 D4Y...

Img 4943
May 24: Collective Bra Burning Day
  • 12,000 BC - Og the caveman wears a Ramones t-shirt despite having never heard them, making him the world's first poser.
  • 10,000 BC - Blue eyed bitch is saved by mastodons and or mammoths really who cares it was a terrible movie. oh yeah , there was a sabertooth tiger!!!!1
  • 274 BC - The first step towards capturing a unicorn is taken - finding a virgin.
  • 137 - Joan of Arc's sitcom, That's My Arc, officially cancelled. Riots ensue.
  • 1514 - Fred Astaire announces, "Jesus is a foo'." Angry fans eat records and quickly find that vinyl is addictive.
  • 1676 - The Simpsons stops being funny.
  • 1851 - Oscar Wilde appears on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.
  • 1851 - Queer Eye for the Straight Guy Is cancelled.
  • 1967 - A giant rat gives birth to Michael Bolton.
  • 1934 - Ban on oak, termites allergic.
  • 1980 - After years of searching, archaeologist Foos Babaganoush finally finds Stalin's cheese grater.
  • 2001 - Snoop Doggy Dog is misteriously murded by one of his bitches. "Faw Shizzle" ~ Replies Rapper R Kelly
  • 2005 - AOL frisbees become popular
  • 2006 - 400th birthday of the pevlic thrust! Show us how it's done!
  • 2007 - non huffable kitten the movie:god attacks! is released
  • 2008 - Due to the hatrid of people who watch Grey's Anatomy Insted of The Office and Scrubs, James Madison kills every person who watches that show.
  • 2010 - The Cleavland Show is a huge success and Family Guy is canceled.
  • 2010 - Dr Cow is feted for surviving 50 years
  • 2014 - Tom Cruz loses all hope of being a legendary hero and returns to his home world.
  • 2035 - TV show Lost renewed again. Critics complain about the lack of new content. The critics' critics complain about the same thing. 24 follows suit.
  • 2460 - Axe deodorant officially banned from the United States. The first good decision ever made by a president.
  • 2660 - Pedo Bear gives birth to M.i.L.F Bear

70D4Y'5 F347UR3D PIC7UR3

LandoftheJews

Land of the Jews, based on promo poster for George A. Romero's film Land of the Dead.

Image Credit: RabbiTechno
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

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Bird (rw) (pictured) | Edexcel | Manchester NH | Jean-Jacques Rousseau | Megyn Kelly | Whales | Springtime writing contest: Lemonade | Boaty McBoatface | Clash of the Titans | Cesar Millan | Prince | White Knight | Ironman Triathlon | Travesty | Theseus | Richard Simmons | Trujillo, Peru | Throwball | WONE radio | Iquitos, Peru (from Inciclopedia) | Helmsley | Keighley | Skipton | Calais | Super-delegate | Winners of the 2016 Uncyclopedia Super Bowl: Shredded wheat | Malcolm Turnbull | Secret | Kodak | William Shatner | Atlantic Ocean


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Writer of the month
GlobalTourniquet wins Writer of the Month for September in the typical fashion of some prolific writer who has been abscent for 2 years only to return with bold, new ideas for their writing! It should also be noted apart from the fact he is back that he is talented in what he writes and he does a fine job managing UnNews. So hats off to GlobalTourniquet, may he bring many, exciting articles to Uncyclopedia!

Seriously, we love you.


Noobaward
Noob of the Moment is the award that all newbies want and Sinner George has pulled that off excellently (being the second Greek to have this award!) It should be mentioned that his username is deceptive, he is actually a very good George writing new master pieces and getting on well with the dynamics of Uncyclopedia. You should congratulate him on this prestigious honor.

Hats off to you George, may you bbe with us for many months years to come!


BePrepared
It is said last months winner has an ego comparable to Napoleon but both of these people are nothing compared to the ego of Frosty, as both winner of Uncyclopedian of the Month (second time!) and the writer of this update he will stain this section with vanity and how wonderful he is. Frosty is a wonderful Uncyclopedian, he is the best, he will crush you all. He has no time for the likes of you and he is the new administrator and unless you worship him he will take you on a free of charge trip on the banwagon!

HEIL FROSTY!



Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Month | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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Potatohead aqua Featured Article  (read another featured article) Featured version: 1 April 2008
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