Today's Featured Article - Shanty town
Greetings everyone and my name is Bob Smiles! I am a business man currently living in a shanty town and I would like to tell you that they are the BEST TOWNS EVER!!! I mean, you have everything you want in there! Including your essential roof! It has lots of holes so when the rain comes, you get a free shower! How cool is that? And that's not all.
You have free toilet paper! Ever stumbled upon a couple of rags on the ground? Wait, fuck that, they're not rags, they're awesome good quality toilet paper! Rub it on your backside and it gives you a soothing comfortable feeling! Sometimes, it may give you a little squelch,
which is probably those dead insects being crushed under your backside which is probably just the awesome quality's side effects! Cool right?
Still not convinced? The rooms come in cheap prices! You don't need to cross bridges because they already have a big rubbish dump in the river for you to walk on! That just shows us how considerate our President is! Isn't he awesome?
I can see you having second thoughts about this. But don't leave! Not yet! I still have a load of things to talk about with you! You might change your mind, you know... (more...)
Yesterday's Featured Article -
DID Y0U KN0W...
IN 7H3 N3W5
0N 7HI5 D4Y...
February 26: Famous Last Words day
- 123 BC - "To the ASSHOLE!" - Alexander the Gay
- 37 AD - "Wha..." -- Jesus, on cross
- 433 - "...." -- John Cage
- 666 - "Pity me." -- Satan (on Mr.T)
- 777 - "AAA" - AAA
- 1332 - "What's my name?" -- Anonymous , his only sentences that didn't yet quote !!!!!
- 1881 - "Who is it , Who is it" -- Billy the Kid
- 1900 - "My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has to go." -- Oscar Wilde
- 1900 - "As much as I hate him, Oscar is right. I would not want to change a thing." -- Mark Twain
- 1920 - "It can't end like this. Tell them I said something." -- Pancho Villa is hit by history's most unfortunately-timed case of writer's block.
- 1939 - "This is absurd ! This is absurd !" -- Sigmund Freud , after reading Waiting for Godot 1,111 times.
- 1939 - "No! Mine are more absurd than this crap." -- Albert Camus , in reply to Sigmund (MotherF*cker) Freud refered that his works are more absurd.
- 1939 - "Who care about absurdity , Hell are others." -- Jean Paul Sartre , in reply to Albert Camus
- 1939 - "I am dying. Please...bring me a toothpick." -- Fred, after reading Waiting for Godot 99,999 times
- 1939 - "See! This one is more absurd that you two !!" -- Jean Paul Sartre , awaken from his grave to make some last words and then sleep again.
- 1945 - "Later, suckas!" -- Adolf Hitler, in his muthafuckin' bunker, yo.
- 1945 - "Peace out, bitches!" -- Jozef Goebbels comin' at you live, also from A to the D to the Hizzle's concrete crib, yo.
- 1955 - "Watah.......Wahtah" -- Helen Keller
- 1960 - "Shaken , not St..." -- James BonBon, on being shaken to death by a bar owner before he can finish his Martini.
- 1967 - "I know you've come to kill me. Shoot, you are only going to kill a man." -- Che Guevara, where 'only going to kill a man' mean that he'll be later revived as zombie and sticker-tags.
- 1989 - "Doh!" - Homer Simpson
- 1999 - "Chuck Norris who?" - Some guy about to find out
- 2000 - HOLD MY BEER WATCH THIS.... - Unknown
- 1999 - "Tomorrow, I shall no longer be here." -- Nostradamus, his only one prediction that came true.
- 2006 - "And this rope is of shitty quality!" -- Saddamn complaining his ass into his grave.
- 2007 - "This is an Arrow!" -- Spartan Guy from Horrible movie
- 2007 - "Snort..snort....snoooooorrrttttt!" - Some guy about to OD on Kitten Huffing.
- 2008 - "Phdugy'dufc eibgs'ghib kuikhigihdmvgh's" -- Cthulhu
- 2111 - "Hey Hey , My My... whatever, I'm going to die!!!" -- Neil Young
- 2175 - "I'm dying...so that I'm not going to live anymore." -- Captain Obvious
- 2175 - "Am I Dying? Really? What are "last words" anyway?" -- Captain Oblivious
- 2345 - "What's this button do???" -- George W. Bush the 7th
- 2456 - "WarniT!" -- Jesus Goffer
- The End of Everything - "Sorry for the inconvenience" God
- 1969-"This is one small step for HOLY...!"--Neil Armstrong