BDSM

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[[Image:Sade100.jpg|thumb|Inventor of Sadism, The [[Marquis de Sade]]]]
 
[[Image:Sade100.jpg|thumb|Inventor of Sadism, The [[Marquis de Sade]]]]
{{Whoops|Wife}}
 
 
'''BDSM''' is an acronym which can stand for a variety of things. These include 'bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadism and masochism', ‘bondage, domination, sadism & masochism’ and ‘bondage, discipline, submission, mastery’. No two people into BDSM will agree on what it stands for. Or agree about anything else. This is a rule.
 
'''BDSM''' is an acronym which can stand for a variety of things. These include 'bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadism and masochism', ‘bondage, domination, sadism & masochism’ and ‘bondage, discipline, submission, mastery’. No two people into BDSM will agree on what it stands for. Or agree about anything else. This is a rule.
   
Though the practice has existed for centuries (De Sade seems quite in favor of it), it is only in the age of the Internet that the rest of us have had to put up with this bullshit.
+
Though the practice has existed for centuries, it is only recently in the age of the internet that it has blossomed so.
   
 
== The Philosophy ==
 
== The Philosophy ==
BDSM operates on the principle that if you are too emotionally insecure to believe that anyone would fuck you, you might find someone prepared to beat you. Or poop on your head.
+
BDSM operates on the principle that you seek to be controlled or control that you feel the intimacy more arousing when control has left your hands or control is in your hands.
   
 
== The Community ==
 
== The Community ==
 
[[File:Bettiegiftwrap.JPEG|frame|400px|"Please wrap it to go."]]
 
[[File:Bettiegiftwrap.JPEG|frame|400px|"Please wrap it to go."]]
BDSM online communities are spaces for sad individuals to look for ‘hot bi babes’ or a ‘webcam mistress’. The man advertising for an attractive pervert is fat, ugly and married. His idea of fun is to put an out-of-focus photo of his inadequate dick on his profile.
+
BDSM online communities are spaces for such individuals to look for and speak with other such individuals of similar beliefs and interests.
  +
This ranges over a wide variety of different kinds of people but for the most part they're all quite civil.
   
Online discussions revolve around who knows more about BDSM, has the most slaves, or is most deserving of respect. Then there's the bullshit about safety and sanity. Fortunately, few people who talk about BDSM online have any experience of it.
+
Online discussions often revolve around who knows more about BDSM, has the most slaves, or is most deserving of respect. Then there's the long discussions about safety and sanity.
   
One subculture within BDSM goes by the name of Gorean. Goreans are the pervert equivalent of a Trekkie, attempting to have their lives guided by badly written fiction. BDSMers sometimes laugh at Goreans, unaware of the irony.
+
BDSM parties consist of people wearing fetish outfits often consisting of latex, leather, rubber and other such materials, typically black, which often serves to emphasize their particular role or style (Dominant outfits, submissive outfits, etc..). Many often wear hoods or similar to conceal their identity and keep their interests anonymous to all but their closest friends.
   
BDSM parties consist of people wearing ‘fetish outfits’ which fail to disguise the actual shapes of their bodies. It is evident that no BDSMer owns a mirror, because if they had a chance to look at themselves in their tacky outfits they wouldn’t have left the house.
+
Many BDSMers refer to their practices as ‘the lifestyle’ when discussing it with others. This type of person often literally integrates it as part of their lifestyle, either at home or at work. Such as dominatrix's, full-time slaves/pets and similar people.
 
The more pathetic BDSMers (all of them) refer to their practices as ‘the lifestyle’ when discussing it with other perverts. This allows them to feel they belong to a secret club, rather than just hanging out with a bunch of weirdos who whack off to creepy porn.
 
   
 
== Psychological Aspects ==
 
== Psychological Aspects ==
It is not impossible that an individual BDSMer is open minded, well rounded, highly intelligent, and damn good at their profession. It is, however, fucking unlikely.
+
Surprisingly most BDSMers are relatively open minded, well rounded, highly intelligent, and either are just getting into it or know every single damn detail about it.
  +
It's true that some BDSMers are extremely fond of non-consensual bondage and rape, however most, if not all of them, only practice it with partners who are similarly into it or have previously agreed upon it as a possible occurrence. BDSM is not all about rape and most (2 thirds or more) of the BDSM community prefer it consensual and wholly voluntary.
   
BDSM is still rightly considered a mental illness. Unfortunately, psychologists thought that the cure would be to place the patient in a straight-jacket and give them electroshock therapy. Since the sickos loved the treatment, the doctors gave up and released them into the ordinary community. So now we have to deal with these damn dirty perverts.
+
BDSM is still wrongfully considered a mental illness, unfortunately. Much as gay people are considered a sin by religious straight people, BDSMers are similarly considered degenerates by close-minded conservative people.
  +
This is wrong and it's another example of how close-minded many people are. A Blue person might consider Red disgusting and vice versa; the Red person might consider the Blue a bully and a meanie, but that doesn't mean either of them should hate another person for their colour. The two ought to get along and ignore each other's differences.
   
 
== Roles in BDSM ==
 
== Roles in BDSM ==
 
=== Dominant/Top ===
 
=== Dominant/Top ===
[[Image:Dom-top.jpg|right|thumb|200px|Dominant/Top]]The dominant, or top, is in control of the activity. A professional [[Mistress]] top is called a Dominatrix. The difference between an amateur dominant and a Dominatrix is that the former also goes by the name 'wife'.
+
[[Image:Dom-top.jpg|right|thumb|200px|Dominant/Top]]The dominant, or top, is in control of the activity. They are typically the one doing the tying and the one with all the power. Females are often referred to as "Mistress" and sometimes make a profession out of being a "Dominatrix", a dom-for-hire basically.
+
Males are typically referred to as "Master" and also often pursue the interest in a career of some sort, although I'm not actually sure what they'd be called.
Male tops can be identified by the presence of a leather waistcoat and having a fat partner at the party.
 
   
 
=== Submissive/Bottom ===
 
=== Submissive/Bottom ===
[[Image:Sub-bottom.jpg|right|thumb|200px|Submissive/Bottom]]The submissive person in the activities is called a bottom. They are subject to the whims of their top, and must take anything the top dishes out. However, the bottom may utter an agreed upon safeword at anytime to stop the activity. Of course, it will probably be ignored, because everyone knows tops are just jerks and bottoms like having people [[poop]] in their hair and are just getting what they deserve for putting themselves in that situation.
+
[[Image:Sub-bottom.jpg|right|thumb|200px|Submissive/Bottom]]The submissive person in the activities is called a bottom. They are subject to the whims of their top, and must take anything the top dishes out. They are more common than dominants however being a submissive is not a state of mind, nor is it a matter of personality. It is (in my opinion) a matter of preference. You could have the most dominant and uppity personality in the world and you could still prefer to be tied down than the one doing the tying.
   
 
Ms.Leyla says: "Sticks and stones may break my bones but chains and whips excite me. So throw me down, tie me up, show me that you like me!"
 
Ms.Leyla says: "Sticks and stones may break my bones but chains and whips excite me. So throw me down, tie me up, show me that you like me!"
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=== Switch ===
 
=== Switch ===
 
[[Image:Ogura50.jpg||thumb|200px|Switch. oh yeah....]]
 
[[Image:Ogura50.jpg||thumb|200px|Switch. oh yeah....]]
A switch is a person that can (and will!) serve as a top or bottom when needed, sometimes within the same sexual encounter. This is the most severe sort of DDPD and is entirely uncurable. They are the most immoral and the most pervertedestestest person you'll ever meet. Switches are also immune to most forms of attack and so conventional warfare is useless. If you have the misfortune to encounter one, curl up into a ball and wet yourself or play dead. The switch might sniff you or mount you, but will probably lose interest and walk away. Then again, they might drag your supposed corpse on top of them or attempt to place a whip in your hand.
+
A switch is a person that can (and will!) serve as a top or bottom when needed, sometimes within the same sexual encounter. They are essentially a person who can assume either role with matching easy and pleasure. Whether they are the one digging their heel against the back of your head or the ones under your heel. They're neither rare nor common and always a pleasure to meet.
 
I guess you're just screwed if you encounter a switch.
 
   
 
=== Pets ===
 
=== Pets ===
There are some real oddballs out there who like to be treated like animals, these are like BDSM Wierdos fused with Furries. This is the most mind breaking genre blending sickness seen on the interwebs since 2 Girls, 1 Cup.
+
Petplay is a form of BDSM in which the master or mistress assumes the role of the "Owner" and the submissive forms the role of the "Pet". What kind of pet varies all the time depending on what the dom (or sometimes the sub) choose them to be. Sometimes it is a matter of the sub acting and playing like an animal, other times... it's a matter of the dom training them to act like one.
(Lesbians? Yay! Mr. Whippy style Shit? WTF?!)
 
   
Some of these strange and twisted little freaks will actually attempt to gain the fake admiration of their Master/Mistress by bringing them slippers, and then the dog/bitch/boy/girl/thing will "beg" for the actual beating!
+
An example of this would be for the pet in question to attempt to gain the favor of their Master/Mistress by bringing them slippers or some such similar degrading act.
   
ALL WHILST WEARING FUR AND A COLLAR!
+
Usually, if not always, involving wearing a collar.
   
Some of the worst of the lot can expect to be made to sleep on the floor like a common housewife, or locked in a cage like a Special Olympics "sprinter" before the big race.
+
Some more examples would be made to sleep on the floor or in a kennel of some kind like a common house pet.
Finally, the rules for these so called "pets" are similar to wild or feral animals. Show you are the boss and don't acknowledge them beyond a cursory glance, don't try the Wolf "look between your legs at them" thing, you will probably just end up bitten. And of course, if you are an absolute pansy, you could always try the curl up in a ball defense. DISCLAIMER: Remember that unlike the aforementioned Switch, the Pet probably WILL sniff and mount you, and at the end will just add their urine to yours, with their cocked leg adding extra sting to the tears of humiliation in your eyes.
 
   
Don't be a pansy, don't get kinky furry raped. Unless you are into that. And that is a whole other thing....
+
Finally, the rules for these pets are similar to an animal's. Show you are the boss and don't let them think otherwise. Reward them with treats when they are good then punish them with punishments when they're bad.
   
 
=== In Space ===
 
=== In Space ===
 
[[Image:Janeway-2way.jpg|right|thumb|300px|Top spanking bottom's bottom]]
 
[[Image:Janeway-2way.jpg|right|thumb|300px|Top spanking bottom's bottom]]
If you are in space, there is no up or down, exactly the same as Gillette Mach 3 Turbo. You can't be on top or on bottom. There are no female astronauts anyway. It should be noted that no one will be able to hear you scream, due to the lack of sufficient atmospheric properties.
+
If you are in space, there is no up or down, exactly the same as Gillette Mach 3 Turbo. You can't be on top or on bottom. It should be noted that no one will be able to hear you scream, due to the lack of sufficient atmospheric properties.
 
== Practices ==
 
BDSM includes a variety of practices, from the nearly mundane to the extreme. Some common practices include:
 
* Discussing safewords on the Internet for ten hours straight
 
* Yelling Random safewords in public to signify to your crowd of fuck-buddies that you are horny.
 
* Endless discussions on whether dominant men should be called Sir, Master, Dominus, Lord, King, or whatever
 
* Endless discussions on whether dominant women should be called Mistress, Ma'am, Goddess, Queen, Domina, or whatever
 
* Endless discussions on how to be a TRUE slave
 
* Rants about which dominatrix received the most cockshots that month
 
* Rants about men not reading the entirely tedious profile of some wannabe, and just sending an otherwise polite e-mail which failed to mention the one tiny detail embedded sixteen pages into the online fantasy she created just to stop her having to think about her husband and kids, and which she will never get to act out, because that’s not actually her picture in her profile, just an image of someone 100 pounds lighter that she copied from Facebook
 
* Mocking other subcultures, e.g. Furries, as if BDSM isn't the most ridiculous subculture of all
 
* Typing incest fantasies with bad spelling and punctuation
 
* Typing bestiality fantasies and believing that spelling it 'K9' makes it morally acceptable
 
* Typing rape fantasies, and then defending them at length
 
* Watching reruns of The [[Dukes of Hazzard]]
 
* Visiting the in-laws
 
 
== Diagnosing ==
 
[[File:The flagellation of christ.jpg|thumb|300px|'''Some deities are into bondage. In fact most of them. This one's safe word is "canaries".''']]
 
=== As a Disease ===
 
Being into BDSM is a disease. It is the symptom, the disease, and the condition. While it has been thought by some that bottoms have a disease but tops don't, this is wrong. Both are equally sick and should be avoided to prevent contamination.
 
 
=== Picking out Pervs ===
 
More often than not, lovers of BDSM can be identified by their bad taste in clothing, and the complete absence of charisma. They are turned on by handcuffs. And whips. And leather. And 1930s movies where women were spanked.
 
 
Studies show that people who like BDSM are pretty much different to real humanity in almost every way.
 
 
However, BDSMers are everywhere, probably due to a contaminated water supply. Even your boyfriend puts on your high heel boots and pantyhose and ties himself up while you're at work, anyway. I'd dump him if I were you.
 
 
== In Popular Culture ==
 
[[Madonna]] was looking damn fine in ''Human Nature'', where she sported BDSM wear. The song, however, really sucked.
 
 
[[Beyonce Knowles]] was also looking damn fine in ''Green Light'' where she wore [[latex]] and ballet boots. However, the trombone solo took away anything good about the song.
 
 
[[Percy Grainger]], a composer in the early 20th century, was a sadomasochist. He is remembered for nothing else.
 
 
== BDSM Websites ==
 
'''bondage.com'''
 
 
Posts on bondage.com take one of three forms: insane, repetitive or inane. Most posts are from Americans asking whether sex without a condom can have negative effects. In fact, the forums read like (badly written) Readers Wives letters.
 
 
'''Informed Consent'''
 
 
British BDSM site. Have a look to understand the kind of sad fucks who lost an Empire by dressing all their men in mommy's panties.
 
 
'''alt.com'''
 
 
The biggest gathering of clueless fuckwits ever. Merely registering on this site is enough to contract syphilis.
 
 
'''collarme'''
 
 
Makes alt.com look like a gathering of the intelligentsia. Consists of wannabe ladyboys who want to come round and do your dishes in exchange for getting a cucumber shoved up their ass.
 
 
'''FetLife'''
 
 
Probably one of the closest things to a kinky facebook, that is for real people in the lifestyle, not just the newbies or wannabe's. Created by John Baku in Canada, this kinky social networking site is among the fastest growing online communities for alternative lifestyles. Covering almost every fetish and kink you can imagine. Unfortunately there are still some of the typical 'online doms' who just try to use it to pick up people or have 'online relations'.
 
 
'''Mistress160'''
 
 
This lady (if she is indeed a lady, since she is never seen) should be called Miss trust 160 Her site consists of various links to other sites mainly the afore mentioned fetlife (enough said), there is little doubt she can actually write original material, since most consists of others material. If you want pictures of weirdos than this is the site for you complete with watermelon testicles. Her main informational content consists of Femdom Tea parties, so lady boys buy your cucumber, do her dishes this one for you. This service is all brought to you on a blogger platform readily available to youth just waiting to be weirdos of the future in an unsupervised environment.
 
 
'''Rule34.com'''
 
 
[[Image:Pichu-Bondage.gif|thumb|right|thumb|This is one of the examples...]]
 
Although furries do ramble about sexuality courses, bondage are most common to the likes of furry nations. But please, animals and bondage?! THEY DON'T GO TOGETHER!!! Until 4chan came up and stepped in... "This is the internet bitches! What happens in the internet stays in the internet!" The next time you see a cartoon show that you love and cherish... just remember... the internet can destroy your childhood memories!
 
   
 
{{Fetish}}
 
{{Fetish}}
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[[Category:Cruelty]]
 
[[Category:Cruelty]]
   
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[[eo:BDSM]]
 
[[pt:BDSM]]
 
[[pt:BDSM]]

Latest revision as of 14:35, July 10, 2014

Sade100

Inventor of Sadism, The Marquis de Sade

BDSM is an acronym which can stand for a variety of things. These include 'bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadism and masochism', ‘bondage, domination, sadism & masochism’ and ‘bondage, discipline, submission, mastery’. No two people into BDSM will agree on what it stands for. Or agree about anything else. This is a rule.

Though the practice has existed for centuries, it is only recently in the age of the internet that it has blossomed so.

edit The Philosophy

BDSM operates on the principle that you seek to be controlled or control that you feel the intimacy more arousing when control has left your hands or control is in your hands.

edit The Community

Bettiegiftwrap

"Please wrap it to go."

BDSM online communities are spaces for such individuals to look for and speak with other such individuals of similar beliefs and interests. This ranges over a wide variety of different kinds of people but for the most part they're all quite civil.

Online discussions often revolve around who knows more about BDSM, has the most slaves, or is most deserving of respect. Then there's the long discussions about safety and sanity.

BDSM parties consist of people wearing fetish outfits often consisting of latex, leather, rubber and other such materials, typically black, which often serves to emphasize their particular role or style (Dominant outfits, submissive outfits, etc..). Many often wear hoods or similar to conceal their identity and keep their interests anonymous to all but their closest friends.

Many BDSMers refer to their practices as ‘the lifestyle’ when discussing it with others. This type of person often literally integrates it as part of their lifestyle, either at home or at work. Such as dominatrix's, full-time slaves/pets and similar people.

edit Psychological Aspects

Surprisingly most BDSMers are relatively open minded, well rounded, highly intelligent, and either are just getting into it or know every single damn detail about it. It's true that some BDSMers are extremely fond of non-consensual bondage and rape, however most, if not all of them, only practice it with partners who are similarly into it or have previously agreed upon it as a possible occurrence. BDSM is not all about rape and most (2 thirds or more) of the BDSM community prefer it consensual and wholly voluntary.

BDSM is still wrongfully considered a mental illness, unfortunately. Much as gay people are considered a sin by religious straight people, BDSMers are similarly considered degenerates by close-minded conservative people. This is wrong and it's another example of how close-minded many people are. A Blue person might consider Red disgusting and vice versa; the Red person might consider the Blue a bully and a meanie, but that doesn't mean either of them should hate another person for their colour. The two ought to get along and ignore each other's differences.

edit Roles in BDSM

edit Dominant/Top

Dom-top

Dominant/Top

The dominant, or top, is in control of the activity. They are typically the one doing the tying and the one with all the power. Females are often referred to as "Mistress" and sometimes make a profession out of being a "Dominatrix", a dom-for-hire basically.

Males are typically referred to as "Master" and also often pursue the interest in a career of some sort, although I'm not actually sure what they'd be called.

edit Submissive/Bottom

Sub-bottom

Submissive/Bottom

The submissive person in the activities is called a bottom. They are subject to the whims of their top, and must take anything the top dishes out. They are more common than dominants however being a submissive is not a state of mind, nor is it a matter of personality. It is (in my opinion) a matter of preference. You could have the most dominant and uppity personality in the world and you could still prefer to be tied down than the one doing the tying.

Ms.Leyla says: "Sticks and stones may break my bones but chains and whips excite me. So throw me down, tie me up, show me that you like me!"

edit Switch

Ogura50

Switch. oh yeah....

A switch is a person that can (and will!) serve as a top or bottom when needed, sometimes within the same sexual encounter. They are essentially a person who can assume either role with matching easy and pleasure. Whether they are the one digging their heel against the back of your head or the ones under your heel. They're neither rare nor common and always a pleasure to meet.

edit Pets

Petplay is a form of BDSM in which the master or mistress assumes the role of the "Owner" and the submissive forms the role of the "Pet". What kind of pet varies all the time depending on what the dom (or sometimes the sub) choose them to be. Sometimes it is a matter of the sub acting and playing like an animal, other times... it's a matter of the dom training them to act like one.

An example of this would be for the pet in question to attempt to gain the favor of their Master/Mistress by bringing them slippers or some such similar degrading act.

Usually, if not always, involving wearing a collar.

Some more examples would be made to sleep on the floor or in a kennel of some kind like a common house pet.

Finally, the rules for these pets are similar to an animal's. Show you are the boss and don't let them think otherwise. Reward them with treats when they are good then punish them with punishments when they're bad.

edit In Space

Janeway-2way

Top spanking bottom's bottom

If you are in space, there is no up or down, exactly the same as Gillette Mach 3 Turbo. You can't be on top or on bottom. It should be noted that no one will be able to hear you scream, due to the lack of sufficient atmospheric properties.

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