Awkwardness

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Revision as of 14:44, August 16, 2012 by 149.241.44.203 (talk)

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Situations1

Making conversation with your friend's new dress can be awkward.

“...erm... I, uh... I c... aha, ha, ha... well, erm...”
~ You after your mom walked in on you watching pornography

Awkwardness is a form of spontaneously occurring social torture, and is widely acknowledged as being the worst thing in the world. Terrorism, disease, rape, genocide and all the other terrible machinations of mankind's darkest moments pale in comparison to the cruel reality that is awkwardness. Awkwardness can strike unexpectedly at any moment, and can manifest itself in a variety of forms, such as that feeling of utter, helpless terror that takes over when a date with a girl suddenly lapses into silence and you find yourself melting into a little pile of amorphous goo under the sheer heat of embarassment, with the horrible awareness of how long it's been since either of you said anything becoming the only thing you can think of. Although awkwardness doesn't usually last too long and exists only within the mind, it can be a crippling process that leaves you scarred for life and to this day remains the number one cause of getting a bit hot under the collar in the world, even in third world countries where they're too poor to have collars.

Awkwardness is when you accidentally touch your friend's genitals, and you like it.

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