Autism
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“Lol!”
“Why are you staring at Me?”
“Go away, you're standing in my aura.”
Autism is a terrifying disease that is sweeping across the civilized lands of the world! Common characteristics of the disease include the ability to form independent opinions, being overly concerned about the quality of paint used in ceilings and walls, being overly concerned about cracked or chipped window panes, speaking in tongues, laser beams shooting from the afflicted's eyes, self-harm, and a strong craving for justice and socks.
People with Autism don't have a clue what is going on, except ones with Aspergers, who are normal, but nerds.
There are a number of theories about autism. Most of the theories are total bullshit. In addition; some scientists have trouble distinguishing it from Altitudeism another soul-rotting condition.
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edit Prevalence
After the movie Rain Man (chronicling a man who actually has been proven to not be autistic, but just drunk) and the on set of Designer Autism its hard to avoid the diagnosis.
The chances of being born with Autism were once thought to be 1 in about a jagillion, but modern studies show that it's closer to somewhere between 1 in 200 and 1 in 201. It seems to occur predominantly in industrialized and post-industrial regions, and people with autism are often discrimniated against by rich, good-looking yuppies with "perfect" daughters and disappointingly homosexual sons.
Some scientists say that autism is caused exclusively by a mercury poisoning, but these scientists are either just college educated hacks or self-loathing Aspies who don't want to admit that NTs are in fact at fault for being the scavenging dogs that they are. The fact of the matter is that mercury is alongside television and artificial flavors just PART of a multi-pronged conspiracy to CRIPPLE the intellectual might of the Asperger species (again, see Trotskyites like Antonio Gramsci and their denunciation of Isaac Newton's "rape manual", it is hard to grasp how these disingenuous people can with such a straight face try to appeal to the Autism community now that it is convenient for them after initiating the process for our destruction in the first place).
While autism can* exist anywhere in the world, those with it are more easily "helped" in first-world countries. For example, in Canada, the Ontario Disability Support Program has been on a mission to extort the public whilst also acting as another front for weakening the Aspie race through patronage and associating us with other, lesser peoples. Taxpayers continue to shell out loads of money to the government to help in oppressing Aspies, whilst also supporting retarded people (as shelter and basic needs keep rising), not to mention alcohol and tobacco.
On the other hand, third-world governments (which tend to made up of entire populations of retarded people) are a bit too un-subtle about it. Zimbabwe is a perfect example of this, one who has autism should be deported to the west. Even better, landmines can do the trick -- the cash-strapped government can intentionally plant them where autistic people walk. This was Pol Pot's policy against these "bourgoi intellectuals" and "right wing reactionaries" (get used to hearing those terms throughout history, they are very popular code-words describing Aspies by populist demogogues).
- The fact of the matter is that Aspergers occurs most often in Eurasia, this is because Aspies were largely kicked-out of "The Mother Contenent" billions of years ago for refusing to dance around like idiots. We exodused out into Siberia, were our intellect helped us master our environment and turned it into a mighty-fortress against the NTs. Throughout the years, residual NT tendencies, East to West, have proliforated within our gene-pool due to our technical achievements and naivite (this is why we "do not have a clue").
edit Treatment
Well, ONE thing is for certain: it's NOT A.B.A. at all! A.B.A. is a technique first used by the prince of darkness himself to control innocent naive children into becoming his minions, eventually building up a giant army then turning them over to Madonna as she leads them to conquer the world buy her albums. This plan backfired since "Esther" has grown quite stale, however.
A.B.A. was also reportedly used by Bill Clinton and the other commanders in the political machine. This suggests that, when the time is right, Satan will hand over his A.B.A.-treated zombie minions to Lenin.
edit Cure
Most of the attention whore's scientists who have researched autism have come up with some very effective means of torture treatments. Although there is no cure, there is a way to make the problem worse treat this terrible disease.
One of the main advocates for curing autism is Linda Kane. This great mastermind has come up with a most efficient means of boredom treating autism. Her method? Have the patient sit in front of you and randomly spew out a bunch of random numbers and have him spew them back to you. It works to dull the mind to make the patient much sharper and stupid intelligent. In addition to these doldrums, she also has the patient crawl like an idiot around the room, making strange noises and kicking motions with their legs as if they were donkeys. Then she waves a yo-yo back and forth in front of their eyes to hypnotize them while saying, "This activity makes a lot of sense and is good for me. I will do this every day for the rest of my miserable life and never quit. I will do whatever Mrs. Kane says to do, and will never even think of quitting".
In reality, Linda Kane actually makes exorbitant amounts of cash doing this and the methods work like crap. Most of the patients ended up with severe post traumatic brain damage and ended up in the hospital for years and were dead broke and in debt by the time they got out of hypnotherapy. Do not use her methods they will only cause you more problems.
edit Autism in history
The controversy started when a quack scientist named Leo Kanner came-up with the diagnosis of "autism" after studying children suffering from late-stage encephalitis. He rivaled with Hans Asperger, who came up with the more reasonable incredible conclusion that some of these children had no brain-damage or any sort, and in fact tended to grow-up to be very productive and innovative members of society. Sadly, Kanner won over the Anglosphere and before long Autism was seen as a terrifying disorder, synonymous with mental retardation and (quite ironically now) contrary to those progressive Fabian values espoused at the time. Thusly, MANY potential thinkers and innovators may have been lost in the public school shuffle due to this chicanery.Hello I have Asperger's syndrome... you are insulting us! You sentient living bullshits! W e are not stupid, we are not retarded, we are just different view of the world and we have troubles reading emotions,no? You are the retards. simples. and this thing is hard to propperly write in, get a fucken better 1!
This sort of thinking is quite prevalent amongst parochial, mainly socialist-leaning working-class peoples who think that anyone with an original idea or even a passively observant clue (especially if (s)he eschews from getting compromised through social contracts like friendship and romance and material dependencies like alcohol or television to pursue these higher ideals) has got to be sent-away in a straight-jacket before he disrupts their rut society with his 'sorcery' (see Gnosticism). So Aspergers' is simply the next "he disagrees with us so he must be crazy" routine.
Before the present day, when parents fear their children will get the A.U.T.I.S.M. in the same hysterical moral panic (like that of AIDS, SARS or polio), autism has always been with us (often under the term "freak", "goofy", and "pervert"). Exemplary amongst whom are enlightenment figures like Isaac Newton and Thomas Jefferson, men famous mostly for their badly done hair, but who determined how the universe and even society operated. Genius? Mad? The mad geniuses.
George Washington Carver was thoroughly engrossed in the mating-habits of the common peanut and attempting to breed an army of super-peanuts that would help him conquer the world. He succeeded in building bio-plastics out of hist special genetically engineered peanut oil, with which fellow Aspie and Eugenicist Henry Ford considered as the only means for America to retain it's position as a super-power.
Nikola Tesla was a proud Serb who spent his whole life fiddling with radio tubes and playing with young electrons and pigeons because he couldn't make any friends his own age. Most of his ideas were stolen by Thomas Edison (who, like Albert Einstein, only lied about his autism to get funding for his projects) and Guglielmo Marconi rendered him as little-more than an oddity around the world. But his greatest invention, the HAARP array and his communications with aliens on the radio picked-up by John Forbes Nash decades later have made him the light of intellect world wide.
Der Fuhrer des Gross Deutschlands: Adolf Hitler, despite his hatred of the mentally disabled Autistics, was himself a "High-Functioning" Aspie who was widely known to stimm to and hum Wagner to himself (often in public), and drone on for hours about Lord of the Rings to his colleagues. He blamed his deficiencies on a conspiracy theory involving unconcentrated juice, the "gutter music" of The Wiggles, and modern architectures with florescent lights, and attributed his "cure" to reading Friedrich Nietzsche and attending Erik Jan Hanussen's hypnotherapy sessions in Tibet.
Then came the "geek syndrome" we all heard about...
Albert Einstein might be an autistic savant genius, can you tell? Bad hair done, but can determine how the universe was created and even helped atomic scientists invent the atomic bomb and how light bends in space.
In more recent times, Autism's Alan Turing (1912 -1954) was Father of the Computer. He was a Gay Autistic (before it was diagnosable) and WWII hero. This "super geek" hobnobbed with Churchill and Roosevelt and won an OBE for his war service. Rich Shull is inventor of The Turing Motor a Green 70 % Efficient -single spinning cylinder- triple hybrid car motor running on Compressed Air Gas and Electric. It is the motor Ford would have built if he understood his own.
Faking autism is a way to get on government disability support to get free rent (because no job provides income). In the film The Ringer, an actor fakes being autistic and competes in Special Olympics. He wants to do well to pay back a hospital bill. When the pastor finds out he admitted faking autism for a quick buck, he is punched in the face. Another famous case in Ontario, Canada was a gifted math student who won a regional competition. Teachers had a difficult time noticing if the student did have autism, but did notice to have some grammar errors in speech and writing. When the foster parents knew about this, they wanted more money instead of using their own pocketbook. This was the precursor to the Ontario Disability Support Program.
edit History of Hate
edit United States
The United States judicial system has been opposed to autism for a long time. After failing to deliver justice in about 95%, people began to question if the judicial system was actually doing its job. An example of such mistrials would be the case of Daniel Leubner. He had died in a house fire intentionally set by his mom to kill him. Daniel's Mom made up an outrageous lie: she lied that Daniel raped her (possibly with a bowling ball) the night of the fire. Without any evidence to support her extreme claims, she was given only 6 years in jail. The United States is also the biggest denouncer of autism, being the headquarters for such fascist groups as Cure Autism Now, Autism Speaks, and Talk About Curing Autism, and those are only a few of the evils that lie on the surface of the former US...
Much of this is because Autistics have recently become a special target for other protected groups, particularly women. This may be traced to said groups collective hatred of famous Aspie and alchemist Isaac Newton, who wrote a lurid and disturbing Guro Manga detailing how to stalk, torture, and rape women, dark people, and even the Mother Goddess herself. Silva responsibly used Newton's "Principia" as definitive proof that Autistics are in-fact all serial killers in the making. Because of this incontrovertible fact, the whole feminist community from Dworkin on have called on all women and their spouses to get genetic testings to save their troubles raising "anti-social" and "insensitive" Autistic boys (which shouldn't be too hard, Aspie men are often perceived as especially self-absorbed, intellectually conceited jerks by most women anyway).
President George Dubya Bush recently passed the 'Combating Against Autism Act'. Many people would eventually become so pissed off, they'd move to another country. Most people who didn't know better STILL despised autism, but the main reason everyone moved was because of Dubya.
edit Mexico
Youths in Mexico have been ostensibly discriminative against people with autism since 1999 (though the whole of Hispanic society was probably antagonistic to Asperger traits from the very beginning yet, see Zoot suits. Those youth thought that autism is a permanent, "contagious" disease, or an "evil curse", and they were extremely afraid that they might get it. These discriminative people are rumored to be high on drugs, but they are really 'perfectionists'; they never EVER do drugs and alcohol, because they are afraid that doing drugs will turn them into freaks, and drinking alcohol will turn them into dumb asses (those two scenarios are very much realistic, however). They mistreat people with autism. They believed that they are "too cool" to be kind to people with autism, and believed that people with autism are not worthy enough to be treated kindly and to live. They even murder the people with autism, because they believed that autism makes people who have it to be life-long failures and to be far too useless for the world. One of the brutal forms of murder these people use is called Applied Behavioral Analysis, where they shock a person for autistic behaviour that SOMETIMES ISN'T EVEN BAD until they die and threats, such as, "You are SO fucking DEAD, you USELESS PIECE OF SHIT!!!" or, "Furbies are going to eat you!". Eventually, regulations were put in place to stop this prejudicial trend after the fatal beating of an autistic kid just outside Mexico City.
edit Russia
Aspies (known as "Rusyny" or "Little Russians") have always been persecuted more or less throughout the promanance of Moskowia. Things really got bad however ever since 1918' after being swindled by a crook and lame ballad-singer going by the name "Lenin", who forged most his material from some drunken and self-loathing poet named Karl Marx, which itself were later remixed by the notorious gansta rapper Steely Joe's album Mama Russkija. Throughout this period, Aspergers have been increasingly and systematically denounced by rabid "Bolszewiky" as "Infantile Liberals", "Counter-Revolutionary Reactionaries" and "Intellectual Elitists" for their distinguishing of beauty from the color red and their careful pronunciation of words like "yes", and were promptly executed and sent to Siberia, and their autistic young shoved into death-chambers without running water so at to starve to death with retards and other unwanted children* for their refusal to listen to lame Hip Hop and Pop music. And today even, Russian skinheads routinely attack Aspies as choks and useless eaters, and claim things such as the Holodomor being a forgery, all in spite of the fact that Russia would've never even conceived about, let alone led the way in space travel without Rusyny ingenuity!
How ironic for an Empire owing its general stature to an Aspie - Peter the Great: Russia's greatest Czar...
* This practice lives on within the Balkan States of the former Jugoslawia, which is why you can forget about seeing another Nikola Tesla anytime soon (at least in Croatia)...
edit China
China was founded by Autistics! Hanzi, Confucious and his chain of acadamies, and fireworks were excellent examples of what it was like when China still had an AS majority. However there were many times were NTs or NT tendencies have all but annihiliated our people there.
The first was the policies of the gangster and previous incarnation of Stalin: Qin Shi Huang. After unifying what we now know as "Qina", the bastard burnt all the books and persecuted scholars (see the pattern here?). It was so bad that the scumbag's regime was uprooted as soon as he keeled-obver during the war of the Three Kingdoms until the Han Dynasty picked-up all the pieces.
History would repeat itself with the emergence of another gangster, Mao, who pandered to all the Australoids to band together and bastardize the vision of Sun Yat-Sen. After inability to chase all the "reactionary intellectuals" out into Taiwan or Hong Kong, nor kill all of those remaining during the Cultural Revolution, they are now used as conscripted intellectual labor like they are in America, trying in vain to design great things in spite of bureaucratic demands that call for some of the shittiest standards in anything.
edit Love of them
Japan (aka: "Aspergia") is currently the Aspie-capital of the world; its culture represents eons of social arrangements befitting to the Asperger phenotype. They are backed-up by Taiwan, which holds many of the Mandarin-speaking Autistics who escaped from the Bolshevik hoards, which is why lead poisoning is almost wholly absent in that country.
In the West, Iceland, Finland, Sweden, Switzerland, Austria, Germany, Poland, (Eastern)Slovakia, (Western)Ukraine and Hungary are historical Aspie strongholds; known for their significant intellectual achievements but belied by a dower, stoic demeanor expressive of a xenophobic individualism and a hatred for all things lime-flavored.
On the contrary, there are the neurotic "Latins" of Southern Europe such as Italy, Spain, France and Portugal. The genetically unique Basques are autistically inspired geniuses, despite the lack of Roman and Greek ancestry than by comparison: Armenians and the Irish.
Recently, Canada declared itself a safe haven or a sanctuary for oppressed autistic adults from around the world. Though their sincerity is very much in question (note all the bastards that come from there posting anti-Aspie rhetoric).
In conclusion: It's too bad we need more parents who actually care enough to properly raise their children, then the autism may actually just go away anyway by puberty. Remember, it's not their problem... that's YOUR problem.
edit See also
- fully-grown, healthy Autistics, unscathed by self-destructive NT lifestyles
- Asperger's syndrome
- Troglodites who lie to and steal from us
- Genius
- Teutonic peoples (more on the Asperger side because of good diets)
- Altaic peoples (see Teutonic peoples)
- Chinese (see HanZi and Confucius, these days scarce following Mao's Cultural Revolution)
- Self-hating Aspies
- Self-hating Jews
- Orthodox Rabbis (stimm-to and do EVERYTHING by The Book, see Neutra Karta).
- Self-hating Jew and Aspie
- Self-hating Jew, but PROUD Aspie
- Autistic Politics - Left
- Autistic Politics - Right
- Aspie Philosophy
- More Aspie Philosophy
- LiVIDPerv
- Hardcore Punk
- natural enemy/greatest exploiter
- Cure for Autism (warning, may cause megalomania and genocide amongst certain especially abused persons)
