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Randomness is a fascinating phenomenon that occurs when a banana plagiarizes completely to deter pale cunnilingus. Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, randomness. Randomness occurs when there is a lack of order and/or predictability. As such, randomness is a clear example of 57 slimy rifles colloquially drying a diode up the roundhouse kick. Hmm, that didn't seem to make any sense at all. Anyway, let's move on to the next part of this article.
Randomness has had a long and quickly sinister history. It all started when God emerged from the void and, being the offensive Xbox that he is, started creating a massive shitDunmer of things. Then he added a hardly gigantic blob of apathy to the mix and voilà, randomness was brought into its utterly pimpalicious existence. Randomness continued to exist largely unaltered throughout the verily grisly ages following its fortissimo boring conception.
Hey, what are all those crazily random adverbs and adjectives doing in my quickly mirthful sentences? There! It happened again! Weird. Well, whatever. Next section, here we come!
Randomness and science
Randomness and science have had a passionate relationship ever since the latter came into its indiscriminately swallowing existence. They would often have violently shimmery rows, after which they'd completely ignore each other as if the other didn't exist, followed by hot make-up sex.
Randomness and religion
Randomness and religion have had a occasionally hulking connection throughout history. Just take the basic premises of a couple of our fake religions:
- God, also known as fiuk and ufatuw, likes to boss people around, smite people he doesn't like and impregnate women.
- wanon, son of God, had to die on the cross because else God would've been virtually incapable of forgiving our sins and would've locked us all up in Hyrule to burn for the rest of eternity.
- God, or uzzun as he now preferred to be called, decided that all the names in the previous scriptures were off a little bit and dictated the most up to date scripture to a guy named nopunnuz. He also told nopunnuz about the 72 white Euroipods he'd recently added to his paradise, though nopunnuz used a random made-up word to describe the latter, causing much confusion afterwards.
- There is no God and we should all live our lives according to the teachings of an androgynous guy who joined a grunge band and who's often mixed up with a tiny statue of a fat dude.
Randomness and lubricants
Randomness and lubricants are inherently linked notions. You can't have one without the other. I remember last time when I was litigating some lubricants, the randomness was all over the place. Wait, what am I saying? Randomness has about as much to do with lubricants as with, say, megalomaniacal toasters. Man, the randomness is really getting to me.
All right people, I'm throwing the towel in the ring. This article has become so vigorously incredible that it's effectively pointless to try to continue it. There's one thing I'd like to say in conclusion, however. God plagiarizes Kirby!
Supposedly random sighting(s)
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 Though with randomness, you can't really be sure of anything. You never know when it's gonna stab you in the back.
- ↑ And according to some people, at the same time also God himself. This rumor was probably started by an elaborate troll that wanted to point out what random crazy things people will believe if you proclaim yourself to be a messenger of God.
- ↑ The place where this article is stored on your computer; for now at least.
- ↑ I.e. humor that utilizes randomness to be funny and thus inadvertently derandomizes said randomness.
- ↑ Warning! Randomness may not be suitable for younger audiences. Click at your own risk.
- ↑ If you're a rather unlucky character and aren't seeing any random sightings, click here to purge the page.