Anti-Flag

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Anti-Flag is a Smooth Jazz band from Pennsylvania, whose members are best known for bitching about issues that no one cares about (i.e., Long Hair, Not getting enough fries at McDonald's), and changing their last names. In 1999 Anti-flag formed a record company called A-F Records, which stands for Abercrombie and Fitch Records; their main artists are Britney Spears, Anthrax and U2. They wish they were Propagandhi but they aren't Canadian enough. Anti-Flag's main claim to fame is that they shot the sheriff and the deputy. Anti-Flag are currently campaigning for right-wing issues such as white power and US domination of the world.

[edit] Band Members:

Justin Sane (Guitar and awesome vocals) - A known and documented terrorist and a male prostitute. Wanted for exercising free speech in violation of the U.N.'s STFU Act of 1986. Changed his last name to Sane so when people called him insane, he could say "no, its SANE".

Pat Thetic (Drums and ranting) - The most okay drummer in the history of *Deleted*. The city of *Deleted* recently passed a law forbidding Pat from revealing his hometown to anybody by penalty of death. He is also a vegan who dislikes hot food and likes food that tastes like cardboard: So he can only eat Rice Bubbles and frozen midgets. He changed his last name to Thetic because his family was receiving death threats for how fucking awesome he is at playing the drums.

Chris Head (Guitar and silence) - A zombie with no emotions at all. He's a serial killer. The only reason he changed his last name to head is because he likes giving head. Enjoys eating babies and young baby pigs. He also is completely unable to speak, and masturbate all the time.

Chris #2 (Badass Bass and horsey vocals) - Completely retarded. Probably responsible for 9/11(hopefully). Quote: "my name is #2, i am pretty sure that i would like to be your friend...unless of course you are an asshole, then im pretty sure i dont..." He served in the United States Army for 10 years and is dedicated to making the organization non-existant(due to the fact that the Army fucking sucks) . He currently is a recruiter who visits high schools and kills anyone that tries to join. Changed his last name to "#2" for unknown reasons. It has been speculated that he is an alien robot. Or that he was once a male stripper. AND HE SMOKED WEED WITH CHUCK NORRIS THEN BEAT UP BRAD PITT'S DICK. THEN HE DID YOUR MOM. and probably your dad too... oh and dont forget liono the same guy lion thing of the the lately not watched tv series thunder cats.

[edit] Previous Band Members:

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Andy Flag (bass and yelling) - A dedicated member of the Republican party and a high ranking member of Westboro Baptist Church. After leaving Anti-Flag he has been seen working with a number of bands ( e.g. American Lovers, God Save the Bible, and We Need More Oil). He has done guest vocals on several Toby Kieth albums. His original last name was Wright but changed it to Flag to signify his love of the American Flag. He left the band in 1998 to pursue a career at Walmart, but was fired for being a douche bag, and now gives 3 dollar blow jobs outside of his church.

Jamie Cock (pop-rock) - Justin's former brother. He/she had a sex change in 2001 and is now Justin's sister. He/she was kicked out of the band for his/her trans-gendership and homosexuality, which violated Anti-Flag's extreme right-wing ideologies., and of course, anti-flag hates all homos and trannies

[edit] Albums

• No, Seriously, Die for the Government 1996
• America, Mexico, Canada, and Brazil Suck!1998
• The System Actually Works Pretty Well For You1998
• A New Kind of Conservative 1999
• Underground Paramilitary Network 2001
• Immobilize 2002
• The Terra State 2003
• I Am Osama Bin Laden 2004
• For Blood and Imperial system 2006
• A Benefit for Victims of shitty music LP 2007
• The Bright Lights of Mexico 2008
• The People or the Booze 2009

[edit] Right-Wing Lovefest

Anti-Flag has been highly criticized for sleeping with radical conservatives and promoting Republican ideals in their music. Their song "Wish Vick Had Killed More Dogs" exemplifies their hatred of animals and left-wing agendas to get famous conservatives such as Vick thrown behind bars. They often appear on The O'Reilly Factor and Hannity to spend a few moments calling Barack Obama the antichrist and then spew some raicially insensative slurs for a few moments.

[edit] Osama Bin Laden

It is a well known fact that Justin Sane is Osama Bin Laden, and some people believe that in Anti-Flag's 2004 album, "I Am Osama Bin Laden." Justin Sane reveals that he might have an alter-ego. Singles from the album including, "Chris #2 was behind 9/11", "We shoot puppies just to watch them die", and "Wouldn't It Suck if We were the ones who bombed America well we did." are also thought to have hidden messages linking the band to terrorist activity. Former Presidentt Bush once professed in an interview, "Yeah Anti-Flag was behind Nine Eleven, but because they love conservatives and war so much they let me use it as an excuse to try to wipe out Arabs and Allah, plus I like war, I used to play it in my basement when I was a cheerleader."

[edit] Anti-Flag and Jesus

All the members of Anti-Flag love and honor Jesus on a daily basis by praying toward the vatican. They have also pledged to never use a swear word in any song they write. Anyone who mocks or denies Jesus's existence immediately comes under attack from the band, in fact they signed onto a major record label just to produce two pro-God albums, "Love From Beyond" and "Jesus Loves You" Justin Sane then had a nervous breakdown and accidentally entitled his next album "Jesus Sucks Give Me Hell Or Give Me Death" however Jesus has publicly forgiven him.

[edit] More Unimportant Facts

• Anti-Flag is the name of a peg company in Brixton, England.
• Chris #2 has a website called fuckthemilitaryintheasswithanak47.com/domeinthebuttreallyhard
• Anti-flag released a song with the Donots called the protest song. In the song they call for all Americans to protest protesters.
• Anti-flag has released many tracks such as Hug the Pope, Your Daddy Was A Rich Man (And I Love Him), They Protect Us Very Well, I'm Being Watched By Your Mom, AK47 For Peace, Sold Your Freedom and No Paradise Anywhere But The U.S.A.
• Their contract only allows them to play CLEAR CHANNEL owned venues, so much for punk ideals...
• They have also named many songs with an acronym such as O.I.L. which stands for "Oil, I Love" and N.B.C. which stand for "Nazis Behind Corporations".
• They also have some very aggressive song titles to get the message across for people who need to be told exactly what to believe. For example, "(I) Fucking (Love) Police Brutality!" and "Spit in the Face (and your mother as well)"