Ann Coulter

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Ann Coulter often conforms to trends of the conservative right, such as showing as much midriff as possible and dying one's hair with reckless abandon.

Ann Hart Coulter is a liberal parodist posing as a Conservative American social and political commentator, author, and syndicated columnist. She frequently satirizes the Conservative Right on television, radio, and as a speaker at public events. Coulter accomplishes this by supporting opinions that fall far to the right of even the most conservative Republicans, and has become well-known by the controversial ways in which she defends them. When posing as her satirical alter-ego, she describes herself as a 'polemicist', which means that she would not be above kicking a baby in the face if it earned her a thirty second interview on the prestigious Hannity & Combs.^[1] She claims that, unlike other broadcasters, she does not pretend to be impartial or balanced, preferring an entirely unbalanced approach that the Department of Homeland Security might classify as 'annoying.'

[edit] Personal Life

Coulter is very secretive about her personal life, preferring to privately engage in the liberal activities she enjoys so much, such as murdering fetuses and letting dangerous criminals walk the streets. The reason for this is obvious: she needs to mask her participation in these left-wing activities so that she can publicly decry them in her satirical books and columns. For example, if she were seen walking around with her many Arab friends, then her opinion of Middle Easterners as 'terrorist towel-headed camel jockeys who need to be nuked back into the stone age' might be called into question.

[edit] Controversies

Fellow students in her graduating class unanimously voted her Most Likely to Become a Complete Fucking Asshole. She has consecutively held the award of 'Bitchiest Pollitical Pundit' since its creation in 1998.

[edit] Bibliography

• UnNews:Ann Coulter:No shame in electile dysfunction
• Coulter's latest book, 'If I had a penis, I'd be a man' The book is supplemented with a novella entitled 'If Republicans had sense, they'd kill themselves'.

[edit] References

1. ↑ A right-wing talk show consisting of a host, Sean Hannity, and the wide selection of combs he uses to achieve the perfect hairstyle.