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Today's featured propaganda

Today's Featured Article - Town meeting

Faneuil Hall

Town meeting is the municipal legislature in many towns in New England. Town meeting has been called "the purest form of democracy," pure although none of the ingredients are refined. Students of the contaminated version called Congress can restore their faith by studying democracy at full "strength."

Democracy is the form of government where "the majority rules." Americans have historically been giddy about democracy, as they enjoy a system where fifty-percent-plus-one of the voters can have their way on propositions such as:

Recently featured: BioShock

Yesterday's Featured Article - BioShock

BioShock cover

BioShock is an award-winning, first-person shooter video game developed by Irrational and released by 2K Games in 2007. The game is set in the underwater city of Rapture in the 1960s. The player identifies with the protagonist, misunderstood perverted mass murderer ‘Jack’, a character based on the game's main developer, Ken Levine. It is widely regarded as one of the greatest games ever made due to its shocking content, adult themes and political satire, rivaling those sorts of shows that are only screened on HBO after the kids are meant to be in bed.

The game opens with the main protagonist Jack on the transatlantic red-eye flight to an unknown destination. A short clip shows Jack using an empty bag of Quavers in an odd way, followed by his plane crashing into the Atlantic Ocean, killing almost everyone.

Jack manages to survive the crash, and whilst swimming away from the flaming wreckage and bobbing decapitations, spots a darkened lighthouse standing inconspicuously in the middle of the ocean. Balls beginning to freeze, he quickly swims over to it and enters the front door to realise he’s inadvertently discovered the entrance to the hidden underwater city of Rapture. With no other plans in his diary for the day, he descends into Rapture and is immediately confronted with blabbering duo Andrew Ryan and Atlas The Sneaky Paddy. (more...)

Did you know...

*...that Ben Stiller makes everything funny?
  • ...that you can always pay your credit card bills using your credit card?

In the news

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On this day...

September 23: Take a Venomous Animal to Work Day, also National Australian Pavlova is Ours Day.
  • 1143 - Pope Innoocent II rejoins God after taking his wife to work.
  • 1554 - Francisco Vasquez de Coronado, Spanish explorer, dies after taking a rattlesnake to work.
  • 1774 - Pope Clement XIV (b. 1705) expires after taking a lionfish to work.
  • 1972 - The French word "capitulate" is added to the OED (the French themselves have been using the word since 600 BC).
  • 1974 - Two whole words, both alike in dignity, "Capulet" and "Montague", are added to the OED.
  • 1979 - Olympics held in Wigan for the second time.
  • 1986 - Ozzy "Ozzy" Osbourne catches a crazy train. Is late for work. Rioting ensues.
  • 1989 - Songwriter Irving Berlin dies when the platypus he brings to work strikes him with its venomous leg spines.
  • 1990 - First "cow catapult" launch observed in controversial computer game "Nuclear War".
  • 1995 - Samantha T. is born as a baby
  • 2002 - Revolution in Webbrowserland leads to crowning of Pheonix I by Mozilla rebels. Fighting start of Firefox War.
  • 2006 - A homeless man in Australia is beaten sensless by a giant used tampon. Police reports show that the tampon was 'Carefree'.
  • 2007 - Rhys Jones is caught in a drive-by on the way to a Used concert, his collapse to the ground causes the biggest earthquake on human record which in turn brings the end of the world (doomsday)
  • 2008 - Australia freaks out due to apocalypse, but then realises false alarm that it is only a duststorm.
  • 2009 - Australia rejoices as government scientists prove that New Zealand forged pavlova recipe, meaning that Australians now have another reason to mock their cousins across the Tasman.

Today's featured picture

Hand grenade

The M822 Hand Grenade is an explosive device that resembles a hand. On activation, the device lunges towards the nearest throat or throat-like object and latches on tight with its five "fingers" exploding violently in a gruesome mess. Special care must be taken when activating the grenade. When activated, one should run behind the nearest wall or bush and squat down, so that the grenade cannot "see" you.

Image Credit: Mosquitopsu
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Wotm

WANTED
Name: Bradaphraser (sometimes uses aliases "Bradley" or "Bradafag")
Crimes: hatred of the white peoples of the world, denial of free speech to said peoples, rogue punchlines, and your mother is a whore
Reward for information regarding the accused: Cherry Cake
Contact: prussianblue@yahoo.com


Noobaward

To whom it may concern: I am writing to you today regarding Mr. Nydas, who I understand is applying for a position at your institution. Mr. Nydas is one of the most inspiring students I have ever had the p LOLOLOLOL PENNIS THE MENACE IS MY FAVORITE ACTION FIGURE SHITTY SHITTY BANG BANG LOL LOL WHOAAAAA THEEEEESE IZ KOOL, Y'ALLS leasure to instruct; though deaf, blind, mute and crippled from birth, he has managed to overcome his circumstances and express himself eloquently through his writing. His essays and stories are for him an adventure, an escape from the terribly unfortunate and hopeless reality of his life. Though he knows he is unlikely to survive the next four years, he remains irrepressibly cheerful and determined to become a famous author of children's books. You and I know this will never happen, but when he turns to you with his empty eyes, his face tragically wasted by leprosy, one cannot but root for him in his battle with the cruel, cruel world.


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