FANDOM


Goodbye from Uncyclopedia, the content-filled encyclopedia that nobody can edit.

God has inspired us to demolish 31,999 articles in anticipation of the imminent apocalypse.


Please take care not to read the Expert's Guide or browse the Small Five.


Today's Least Interesting Article

Today's Featured Article - The X-HEIRS

XHeirs1

In the study of a large mansion, a strange and silent man sits motioness, brooding... (more...)

Recently featured: The X-HEIRS

Yesterday's Featured Article - Gul Dukat

Dukat

Gul Dukat is a wise Cardassian statesman and cuddly little genocidal maniac from the TV series's Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Keeping Up with the Cardassians, and Gul Dukat Takes Miami. He is widely regarded as being the nicest character in TV history, but is constantly suffering from abuse by the other characters.

Before the beginning of the show, I, Dukat served as the prefect of the planet Bajor, which was under Cardassian occupation protection because they were really weak, primitive and pathetic and didn't know how to take care of themselves. They needed Dukat, to govern and defend them and he was there to help. Unfortunately, at this time, Bajor was threatened by evil terrorists who wanted to overthrow the legitimate government of Bajor, expel their Cardassian protectors, and establish a planet-wide theocracy.

Now, Dukat tried to be as kind as possible towards the Bajoran people, going out of my his way many times to hand out stuffed animals and apple juice. But the Bajorans complained that these had been produced in Bajoran work camps which for some reason upset them. Whatever, more Teddies for me. These happy work camps were created by the Cardassians to help train the primitive Bajorians in more modern ways of manufacturing (and to partially off-set the cost of protecting Bajor). (more...)

If you vote for your favorite articles to be featured, we will kill you.

More of the worst of Uncyclopedia


The future

Redneckontoilet

June 25: National Redneck Day (Southern U.S.), LEON Day (6 months past Christmas); National Catfish Day (US)

  • 524 - Battle of Vezeronce. The Franks defeat the Burgers, and liberate the Ketchup Kingdom from its tyranny and confining round shape.
  • 1620 - Rednecks evolve from the Pilgrims.
  • 1741 - Maria Theresa of Austria is crowned King of Hungary in what is possibly the most confusing coronation in history.
  • 1838 - The first use of Escher-esque architecture is constructed when the Impossible Children's Playground is unveiled. It is not well-received.
  • 1888 - Oscar Wilde pens The Happy Prince and Other Stories, now considered among the first pieces of literature to use thinly veiled homosexual tendencies to illustrate life lessons such as hand-washing.
  • 1906 - Shortly after the introduction of the automobile, the first barrel clown is seen and documented in Jonestown, Illinois.
  • 1997 - The "underfried" volcano erupts in Montserrat. It would be sent back to the kitchen.
  • 1912 - LEON Day is established by Congress. Americans must have their Christmas decorations taken down by this day if their house has not already burned down. The law will be generally ignored by ignorant people claiming ignorance.
  • 1981 - LEON Day is now celebrated in China as the first day of making Christmas ornaments and nuclear weapons for export.
  • 2008 - U.S. President Barack Obama selects a cabinet, yet would require nearly two more weeks to settle on an acceptable bookshelf.
  • 2008 - Congress rejects Obama's choice of bookshelf.
  • 2009 - Michael Jackson dies while experimenting with a new form of moonwalk at the age of 50. His nose would have been 22.
  • 2010 - Catfishing online exceeds catfishing in a lake or river in popularity. Rules 29 and 30 are established but are ignored by ignorant people claiming horniness.

More predictions

Uncyclopedia's sista projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.
UnNews Logo Potato (No text) UnNews
The news source on crack
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
Undictionary Logo Text Undictionary
The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
UnTunes2 UnTunes
Where noisy things can live and prosper
Game-Logo notext Games
Another way to waste time
Gorillatrans HowTo
Instructions and guides for anything and everything
Unbooks-logo notext UnBooks
Content-free books
Unquotable-logo-en vector notext Unquotable
Useless misquotes galore
Uncycloversity-logo-notext Uncycloversity
If it makes sense, we don't want it
UnPoetialogo UnPoetia
Poetry for people who hate poetry
Undebate logo UnDebate
Debating all the irrelevant issues
UnScripts UnScripts
We can ruin stage and film too
Why Why?
Don't make me explain it to you twice
UnReviewsLogo UnReviews
We'll tell you why things suck
Uncyclomedia Commons notext UnCommons
Broken media repository


Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 31,999 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages:
Uncyclopedia Puzzle Potato Notext
Uncyclopedia
English
United Kingdom
W17x11 30557
Desciclopédia
Português
Brazil
45286
アンサイクロペディア
日本語
Japan
18180
Nonsensopedia
Polski
Poland
W17x11 16666
Nonciclopedia
Italiano
Italy
W17x11 13518
Wiki it
1dÉ
Désencyclopédie
Français
France
W17x11 8364
Inciclopedia
Español
Spain
W17x11 10392
偽基百科
正體中文
Taiwan
5720
Uncyclopedia.de
Deutsch
Germany
W17x11 Unknown
Hikipedia
Suomi
Finland
7614
Hikipedia
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on September 3, 2014.
If you find Uncyclopedia or its sista projects amusing, please consider making a donation to help the victims of the War on Terra:

For completely unrelated IRC chat, you may try killing yourself.

Under attack by the Unfair Use Clause, and a squad of magical girls.

Main Page