Alien Invasion

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Revision as of 06:55, January 12, 2013 by ChiefjusticeDS (talk | contribs)

Jump to: navigation, search

bmuht|xp003|A entiuor tsiiv rfo ruoy yldneirf sruobhgien.ehT neilA nosiavnI fo lirpA 6002 saw na nosiavni detcuodnc yb sneila taht drerucoc ni lirpA fo 6002. Sraechnig rfo a ecalp ot dliub a ewn leoth ni lirpA fo 6002, na neila seiceps htiw na egerava QI fo 0053 (eht tnelaviuqe fo 1053 EP serhcaet) emac ot htraE ot raelc eht plnaet rfo otnicurotsnc ni lirpA fo 6002.

Mnay elpoep dah erven draeh fo siht hsiotricllay importnta tneve, mnaily esuaceb ehter saw llabtfoo no eht yltel.

eoshT ohw did ssentiw siht siauq-ctimauart tneve thguoht ti saw a ctipyrc egssaem morf na neila ecar tuoba eht impendnig htaed nad destructnio fo a llmsa plnaet nad tsi strnage niahbtntsia. roF siht ersnao, eht Untied Ntnaios bnnaed nay nad lla mnsaucripts morf ebnig dehsilbpu nad evag ti a GP-31 rtnaig.

esuaceB aidepolcycnU seveileb ni modeerf fo hceeps (tub mnaily esuaceb eht NU nseod’t wnok eerhw ew evil) ew evah dediced ot hsilbpu ehtse a mnsaucript raelcly depictnig tahw ewnt no durnig siht mnior niocnvenience ot humnaknid’s ecnetsixe.


oodG Evennig, htraElnigs

bmuht|thgir|xp003|A phootgraph nekta tsuj ebrfoe eht nosiavni swohnig eotsmhnig yhsfi.<gib>zzub...kcilf...elgrug...</gib>oodG Evennig, htraElnigs. esaelP od otn eb demrala yb ruo eguh elprpu spihsecaps zappnig billnios ot htaed sa ew emoc ni...rer...ecaep. seY, taht's ti. ecaeP. eW era a ecar fo erpyh-ntielligent...rer...ecaps seippih ohw evah no thguohts fo lseravniu odmntniaio tahwoserve. eW dluow evah thguorb eht ibmoK vna fi ti sawn't tegtnig erpntaied.

tahW's taht nouqlE? tahW od uoy emna ehtir gullibiltiy slevel era otn taht wol? tuB ehty deotv nhoJ drawoH ni! Plna B? KO. tsuJ ekma eht 'zzuyb kcilfy' dnuos stceffe agnai, dluow uoy?

Althgir. <gib>zzub...kcilf...elgrug...</gib>oodG Evennig, htraElnigs. esaelP od otn eb demrala yb ruo eguh elprpu spihsecaps zappnig billnios ot htaed. I'm ersu fi uoy saked emos fo eht ftaaltiies ehty dluown't erttu a dab drow tuoba ti. ksA ehtm. OG NO! KSA MEHT!

I ma Captnai noxarF rJ. nad siht si ym oc-otlip, nouqlE nhoJ. eW emoc ebrfoe uoy...ewll...evoba uoy raehtr, erpersentnig a ecar fo erpyh-ntielligent ecaps hmstaers morf a neighbnuroig yxalag htiw eht luos eosprpu fo GNIKCIK RUOY DIONAMUH SDNIEHB! uoY thguoht ruoy neighbruo saw dab. aohW. eW ERA eht sruobhgien morf lleh, tel em llet uoy. Clla A tnerruC riaffA yb lla emnsa; ew'll lltsi eb playnig Emniem ta nnaoynigly duol otnes ltniu 1 ni eht mornnig.

uoY yma eb saknig a nuembr fo tseuqnios. 'ohW?' 'tahW?' 'yhW?' 'eerhW's eht edalmarma?' tuT tut. ehT tiem rfo saknig tseuqnios si ervo, ym seiemne. tI si tiem ot ekma ekil a rorrim nad tcelfer.

eW nraw taht OH OH OH! AH AH AH! ekaM ekil a rorrim: tcelfer. Thta si doog, sni't ti nouqlE? eviG ym scriptwrtier a rsaie. oN, otn yb eht tseticles. seY, yb eht kcen. yerV doog.

eW nraw taht eht folwolnig senecs yma dstierss emos smticiv. noD't yrrow; eht dstierss lliw eb yraropemt.

tuobA eM

bmuht|xp002|dlexxaS, I htae sepyoteerts.ecapS hmstaers (sa uoy lla dluohs wnok) kool otsmla yltcaxe ekil ruoy htraE elephntsa. seY, taht's thgir, thgil sertne hguorht ruo slippu nad si desucfo no eht ertnia yb eht snel. sA sneila ew htae lla fo ruoy ewxxun lacipyoteerts sewiv fo su.

eW sehra aesehttic fetauers htiw hmstaers (ehty evah ti no Mnoyad, yadseuT & yadirF). ehTer era noly eerht mnai dffieernces ebteewn ruoy hmstaers nad su. ehTy era:

1. eW era a emter lnog.

2. eW evah a vsta loop fo wnokledge. tI si otsm defntiiely ebtter thna ruoy loop fo wnokledge esuaceb ew dnet ot thnik uoy tpu oot hcum chlornie ni. eW evah mstaeerd ecaps levart, ruoy lnaguage nad ocnstructed a egral leehw ot nur dnuora ni lla yad! yarooH!

3. eW fnid ruoy htraE hmstaers bornig ni taht ehty emes ot evah no ntieerst ni dlrow odmntniaio fo nay tros. kcaP fo spmiw, ehty era.

eW yojne dlrow odmntniaio, sfot pilwols nad Wsii. uoY wnok, eosht thnigs eerhw uoy evom a thnig nad eht thnig evoms? dlexxaS, I evol ehtm! dnA eht sekoj ym wrtier cna ekma gerta sekoj tuoba ehtm. uoY wnok...tttier...eh ecno dsia...elkcuhc...EH'S TSUJ OGING OT IIW! woH avnta-edrag cna uoy teg! I emna, eht tiem eh...<gib>dzzzzzzb</gib>...hsi grnadmoehtr ni hcruhc saw dab hgunoe tub...<gib>dzzzzzzb</gib>...taht's psuhnig ti.

mmU...ew raeppa...<gib>dzzzzzzb</gib>...a lacnihcet emlborp pu eher, os...<gib>zzb</gib>...xaler nad ew'll eb kcab ertfa siht trohs kaerb.

enO trohS kaerB Ltaer

eWll, ewlemoc kcab ot eht actnio. eW epoh uoy yojneed taht trohs ntiermssniio nad era ydaer rfo ruoy destructnio ekaT 2.

euD ot a terces fmaily emlborp I shlla evah ot evael uoy rfo a ewf moemnts. tI's otnhnig seriosu, tub I odn't wnta ti ebnig broadcsta ot a ottllay dffieernt plnaet taht ym wfie hsa eebn scerwnig oDoctr ohW. I'll elctanet uoy ervo ot nouqlE.

nouqlE's Hruo

olleH, I ma nouqlE. yaM I tsuj ysa woh luferdwno ti si ot eb yortsednig uoy no hcsu a evolly yad. ehT oclruos era bthgir, erna't ehty? I ekil oclruos qutie a bti. nI tcaf, ti saw ym aedi ot pntai eht teelf fo eryortsed spihs bthgir elprpu. I derugfi ti dluow xaler uoy a bti sa uoy eewr dellik.

bmuht|xp051|eWhn nsierted ocrerctly, eht pnieapple si telahl.eWll...ti wno't eb lnog wno. uoY wnok. ehT tiem ewhn tiem si deyortsed rfo uoy otl. epoH uoy yojneed ti elihw uoy oculd.

Aotlsm tiem. seY, yxxarF dluohs eb kcab osno. ynA seocnd wno.

Actullay, did uoy erve eralsie taht ew ysa 'ynA Seocnd oNw' ot ertiertae tahw ew tsuj dsia, tub ew erven ysa ertfa taht 'ynA drihT oNw'? yzarC, lnaguage si.

hA. eerH eh si. oS, htiwtuo fuerhtr ueida, I'd ekil ot hnad siht fntstaaic ewn microphnoe...ti's elprpu sa ewll. I emna, uoy evah ot kctsi ot eht oclruo sceehm, odn't uoy? I syawla wntaed ot eb na ntierior erngsied, uoy wnok. I tsuj evol eht yaw ehty hnadle eht...mmU...yxxarF? tahW era uoy odnig htiw taht pnieapple? oN...taht eloh sni't gib hgunoe! <gib>HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHA!</gib>

Bsuniess sA lsauU

esaelP excsue eht twtichnig ydob no eht dnuorg htiw a egral pnieapple protrudnig tuo fo hsi rae. eH saw bornig eht xiwqer ffo em.

eW emes ot eb ahvnig mnay lacnihcet qelf psu otyad. ehT ecaps-tiem octnniuum emess ot eb ylraluctirap elohy.<fer> noxarF saw strnagely thgir. ehTer eewr a otl fo unsuual dstiurbnaces ni eht ecaps-tiem octnniuum mnaily esuaceb ti saw Thursyad.</fer> eW era ni tcaf ahvnig a otl fo emlborps htiw octnradictnio. ehT noly thnig taht sni't ocmptelely qelfed si octnradictnio.

tI deneppah! Cotnradictnio si puno su! tI's tiems ekil ehtse I wsih I'd lstiened ot ym moehtr.<fer>"tahW did seh ysa?" nouqlE delley morf eht dnuorg ynaknig drah ta eht pniapple.</fer><fer>noxarF deilper "I odn't wnok, I sawn't lstiennig" nad laugehd mnaicllay ta eht roop ekoj.</fer>

Thsi si otn noly trerible, tub luferdwno. tI's otsmla sa dab sa ebnig dnurk.<fer>"tahW's os wrnog htiw ebnig dnurk?" Scermaed nouqlE.</fer><fer>"ksA a glssa fo wtaer" noxarF dsia, htiw a kool ni hsi ecaf ekil a mna ohw ndid't teg a ocrny ekoj. eH ehtn oths hsi scriptwrtier.</fer><fer>oD uoy thnik ehter era oot mnay feerernces ni hcsu a llmsa sectnio?</fer>

eW ebtter ekat a trohs kaerb taht si substntaillay lnog.

ehT Plna

thgiR, taht's ti! oN erom lacnihcet qelf psu. eW'er gnoig ot explnai siht plna neve fi ti sllik uoy! Especillay fi ti sllik uoy.

oNw, siht...aH ah! I teg ti. A glssa fo wtaer si dnurk. regoR Fedeerererr, ervive ym scriptwrtier, dluow uoy?

ehT plna si siht: ew yortsed lla lfierfoms no siht plnaet nad ekat ervo. uoY dluohs eebwra fo eht folwolnig thnigs...ehty folwol uoy erveyeerhw. Pnai ni eht xiwqer.

eW shlla eveihca siht ythgim feta htiw a esnes fo irnoy: ew shlla sue Bsuh's plnsa rfo qarI! oNthnig cna ostp su!

oT tuC A Lnog oStry trohS

bmuht|xp052|ehT htraE si ecno agnai ecaepful.ehT sneila' tseuq rfo a humorosu nad humiltniaig yaw ot llik saw ehtir unodnig. ehT plna saw otn yrev doog nad ehterrfoe eht sneila erceived a leurc floggnig yb htraE's ntnaioal arym fo eerht spuermodels nad a sthgilly aggerssive wombta. ehTy eewr rfoced ot eelf ot ehtir hoem plnaet nad krow rfo elppA Comtpuers.

Mnay elpoep evah protseted taht siht ostry eb bnnaed no eht dnuorgs fo: a) ti ebnig noe fo eht tsekaelb moemnt ni htraE's hsiotry nad b) ti otn ebnig yrev ynnuf.

tuB aidepolcycnU seveileb ni modeerf fo nirfomtnaio nad...<gib>zzub...kcilf...elgrug...</gib>

Punchlnies

<llmsa><feerernces/></llmsa>

eeS Alos

Ctaegory:ehT esrevinu Ctaegory:ecneicS Fictnio Ctaegory:Thnigs taht yma eb tuo ot teg uoy Ctaegory:neilsA Ctaegory:lirpA 6002

Personal tools
projects