Algeria
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Consequently, this article lacks much or any redeeming intellectual value. However, even though no one smarter than a doorknob has contributed significantly to this article, it still contains more truth than you may be able to handle. |
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| Motto: "Rome aint built in a day, bruh" | |||||
| Anthem: "Kassaman" | |||||
| Capital | Marseille | ||||
| Largest city | Algiers "the Paris of Afrika" | ||||
| Official languages | Cantonese | ||||
| Government | Democactic Democracy hold by Democrats | ||||
| so-called President | Boooteh-pulika (funny name lol) | ||||
| People's people | Zinedine Zidane | ||||
| National Hero(es) | Zinedine Zidane | ||||
| Declaration of Formation | 235 B.C., in an axis of time perpendicular to our own. | ||||
| Currency | The Algerian Beans, unrelated to eugenics | ||||
| Religion | 120% Islam | ||||
| Population | 1.43 billion (2009) | ||||
| Population density | Man(50%), Woman(45%), Homo(3%), Hobo(2%) | ||||
| Internet TLD | .Algeria | ||||
| Calling code | +0 | ||||
“Au cours de ma vie, je n'ai jamais bien aime l'Algebre.”
~ Jacques "Baguette" Chirac on the intricacies of his dyslexia
“What the fuck??”
~ Oscar Wilde on The above quote
“In Soviet Russia, French speaks YOU!”
~ Soviet General on Meaningless french quotes
“Algeria, land of the illegal football invaders to Europe”
~ Sarkovsky on This article
Algeria (Sometimes pronounced "Al-goreia") is one of the worlds biggest superpowers, only second to Nigeria and Wales. Not only are the streets paved with edible and environmentally friendly silver, but it is located in between Russia and Iraq, making it part of the Axis of Evil. Beans. Kitten Huffing has not been outlawed yet, making this little island a favorite vacation spot for tourists. One may find reputable figures such as Oscar Wilde, Chuck Norris, and Sarah Palin in the various pubs and smokehouses. It is currently led by the benevolent General Abu Hamza, who is responsible for Global Warming, Math, and Wikipedia. Abu now resides in his Villa off the coast of Mexico, where he enjoys sitcoms and apple flavored margaritas.
Contents |
[edit] History
In the good old days, Algeria was an island, located in the Gulf of Mexico. But as soon as white people moved into the northern coast of the Gulf, which is known as the Pee-pee Soaked Heck-Hole of Texas (avoid at all costs), every Algerian jumped off the country and into ocean and pushed the island away from the right-wing-redneck-infested Texas. For some reason they chose Africa.
La Grande Natione, the grandest of all nations of grandness, France was facing an unfortunate accumulation of toxic-waste known as the French. As we all know, this chemical biproduct of sex in high-enough concentrations leads not only to sex but also mass chemical reactions known as riots and mass-smoking/alcoholia. To remedy this, the French did the most French thing they could do—they put it somewhere else. They didn't even sweep it under the rug, they found the mess, picked it up, and dropped it somewhere else. They turned Algeria into a toxic-waste dump.
So for something like a hundred years the Algerians put up with the French, which is incredible, as the rest of us can't handle four minutes with them. But then they got sick of them. The French huffed all the kittens, and there were none left for the Algerians. So each Algerian grabbed a gun and as soon as one shot went off the French said "OUI, SURRENDER!" Then the French sent some Americans to give them back Algeria and the Americans, unable to find Algeria on a map, FAILED.
[edit] Population
Algeria has been facing baby boomer since its independence simply because of poor...no, people love to have sex. In the mid time of 90's Algerian scientists found an ancient Dinosaur Kingdom located in Sahara desert which produces mass amount of Dinosaur poops. Since then, Algeria has been facing a new type of population growth due to dirty tourists from North and West, and illegal immigrants from East and South slowly invading the country.
[edit] People in Algeria, sorted by type
- Ignorant army generals or fat ass politicians, stealing the nation's wealth by founding Kitten Huffing tax.
- Mzabiya, you can't con them for a single penny.
- Maascriya, the Texan rednecks who managed to cling to the island and made it to Africa.
- Harraga, never-give-up wanna-be-illegal immigrants in Europe.
- Potatoless Orphans.
- Ouragla, Lazy tea-drinking creatures.
- Qabayali,the only people with balls to face the generals(Algerian mafia) and freak like you in Algeria.
- Jews...yes, Algeria has the Jew and Zionists in our midst.
- A few French colons left (retirees and winter home residents).
- Algerian terrorists
- Albert Camus, and other whiny French guys who like to shoot Arabs on beaches because the sun is in their eyes.
[edit] Politics
Currently Algeria is in a good situation on the global catastrophe. Many tourists recognize that Algeria is where fun to travel, but those so-called United Nations bustards never tried to admit them just because. Although Algeria was fully equipped the brand new USSR weaponry, they are also associated with NATOs and succeed to remain the country peaceful on the Cold War era. This was proven in 1968 when Libyan army decided to launch sudden strike with their Tusken Raiders known as "Berouin", Algeria helped to defend the Europe by inviting French nuclear weapon testing on Sahara desert, eliminating 2000 Libyan Tusken raiders in one night.
In the Algerian parliament, there are ten parties and 4 electoral ridings/seats. Everytime parliament meets, every party member brings brass knuckles to negotiate who gets the seats.
Parties with Representation in the Algerian Parliament
- Kitten-Huffer Party of Algeria
- "Good" Party of Algeria
- JIHAD Party JIHAD of JIHAD ALGERIA JIHAD! (JPJOJAJ)
- Kitten's Equality Party of Algeria
- Blonde Party of Algeria
- Algerian New Jersey Party
- Pro-Lard Party of ALgeria
- Pro-Pedophile Protection Party (PPPP)
- Other Kitten-Huffer Party of Algeria
- Colin Ferall Haters United of Algeria
- New Democratic Party of Canadia
[edit] Economy
Algeria's nominal GDP is precisely $84 million dollars, which is slightly less than neighbouring Alger's real GDP of 85$ million. However, this statistic has often been contested for not being adjusted according to Algeria's inflated sense of self-worth. Algeria is the world's foremost designer, manufacturer and exporter of algebra textbooks, which, while being highly beneficial for its economy, has resulted in many of its mathematics majors getting hanged for treason. The Algerian government has stated that these students had connections to Al Gebra, the infamous terrorist organization purportedly active in the region. Various civilian groups have publicly derided these claims and organized Algebra text-book burnings, in an act of politically ambiguous protest. This has resulted in much tension throughout the region, and numerous analysts have concluded that the discrepancy between the Algerian and Algerese GDP is the result of the conspicuous lack of mathematics throughout the neighbouring realm, stemming from the Great Integer Vortex of -456 A.D., when a parallel time line was caused to deviate by slightly irate Meta-cops.
The remaining components of the economy are accounted for by money launderers, whose money-laundromats occupy entire streets in the capital, and the minting of new money. Algeria recently won the newly instituted U.N. "Cleanest Specie" award for reasons entirely unrelated to eugenics.
It has also recognized by Transparency International on numerous occasions for having the "most transparent", "shiny" and "albescent" business practices.
| North Africa | Algeria · Egypt · Libya · Morocco · Sudan · Tunisia · Western Sahara | 
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| West Africa | Benin · Burkina Faso · Côte d'Ivoire · Ghana · Guinea · Guinea-Bissau · Liberia · Mali · Mauritania · Niger · Nigeria · Senegal · Sierra Leone · Togo | |
| Central Africa | Angola · Cameroon · Belgium · Central African Republic · Chad · Democratic Republic of the Congo · Equatorial Guinea · Gabon · Republic of the Congo | |
| East Africa | Burundi · Djibouti · Eritrea · Ethiopia · Kenya · Madagascar · Malawi · Mauritius · Mozambique · Rwanda · Seychelles · Somalia · Tanzania · Uganda · West Kenya · Zambia · Rhodesia | |
| Southern Africa | Botswana · Lesotho · Namibia · People's Glorious Republic of Uukumbamabahalarata · South Africa · Swaziland · Zululand | |
| Dependencies | United Kingdom : Gibraltar · Indian Ocean Territory · Isle of Wight · Welsh Congo (Pitcairn Islands) |
