Africa

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{{factoid|that Africa is God's blindspot?}}
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{{diotcaf|taht acirfA si odG's otpsdnilb?}}
[[Image:Africasad.JPG|thumb|250px|Africa sad.]]
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[[egamI:acirfAdsa.GPJ|bmuht|xp052|acirfA dsa.]]
{{Q|The only thing positive about Africa is HIV.|Oscar Wilde|Africa}}
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{{Q|ehT ylon gniht evtsiiop tuoba acirfA si VIH.|rascO edliW|acirfA}}
{{Q|No surprise people evolved and moved out!|Charles Darwin|Africa}}
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{{Q|oN surprsie elpoep edvloev dna edvom tuo!|selrahC niwraD|acirfA}}
   
'''Africa''' is not actually a country, but a continent. It is widely agreed to be [[Earth]]'s shittiest [[continent]], in more ways than one. For one thing, most of the land is wracked with [[hunger]], [[poverty]], [[disease]], [[genocide]], giant bugs, giant apes and hopelessness. Also, it is caked in [[feces]]. Not [[AAAAAAAAA!|a]] pleasant place to be, all things considered. It's got exotic [[animals]] though. [[Bestiality|Suh-weet!]]
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'''acirfA''' si otn yllautca a yrtnuoc, tub a tnentnioc. tI si ylediw ederga ot eb [[htraE]]'s tsettiihs [[tnentnioc]], ni erom syaw naht eon. roF eon gniht, otsm fo eht ldna si edkcarw htiw [[ergnuh]], [[ytervop]], [[dsiseae]], [[ediceong]], tnaig sgub, tnaig sepa dna ssensselepoh. oslA, ti si edkac ni [[secef]]. oNt [[AAAAAAAAA!|a]] tnsaaelp ecalp ot eb, lla gnihts ederdsnioc. tI's otg ctioxe [[slamnia]] hguoht. [[Bsetialtiy|uhS-teew!]]
   
==History==
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==Hsioyrt==
[[Image:AfricanFood.JPG|200px|left|thumb|If colonial Africa had been a plate, it would've looked like this. Without the abundant food, of course.]]
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[[egamI:acirfAnFood.GPJ|xp002|tfel|bmuht|fI lnaioloc acirfA adh eebn a etalp, ti dluow'ev edokol ekil htsi. Wtihtuo eht tnadnuba dfoo, fo seuroc.]]
   
The continent of Africa was first formed many many moons ago. Exactly how many moons ago is not important unless you're studying [[geology]], and since you are currently browsing [[Uncyclopedia]], I think it's safe to rule that one out.
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ehT tnentnioc fo acirfA saw tsrif edmrfo ynam ynam osonm oga. yltcaxE woh ynam osonm oga si otn tntaropmi sselnu uoy'er studynig [[yogloeg]], dna secni uoy aer eurcrntly rbowsnig [[aiedpolcycnU]], I htnik ti's efsa ot elur taht eon tuo.
   
Africa is notable in that it is the original homeland of the human species. Keep in mind that this is the consensus reached by the [[science|scientific community]] only. [[Fundamentalism|Fundamentalists]] for some reason do not like the idea that [[Adam]] and [[Eve]] were Africans. Charming lot, those fundamentalists.
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acirfA si otnelba ni taht ti si eht roignial oemhldna fo eht namuh seiceps. peeK ni mnid taht htsi si eht susneosnc eracehd yb eht [[ecneisc|cftniieisc communtiy]] ylon. [[Funaedmntalsim|Funaedmntalstsi]] rfo oems ersnao od otn ekil eht aedi taht [[admA]] dna [[Eev]] ewer acirfAns. Charmnig otl, eosht funaedmntalstsi.
   
Back at the dawn of [[humanity]], Africa was a harsh yet beautiful land. The climate was comfortable, the [[Sahara]] was a vast grassland, and the [[animal]]s were not nearly as vicious as they could have been. Gotta look for the [[silver]] lining in these things.
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kcaB ta eht nwad fo [[namuhtiy]], acirfA saw a hsrah tey ebautiful ldna. ehT climtae saw comrfotelba, eht [[arahaS]] saw a tsav grssaldna, dna eht [[lamnia]]s ewer otn ylraen sa suoiciv sa ehty dluoc haev eebn. aottG okol rfo eht [[silevr]] lnniig ni ehtse gnihts.
Africa was also home to the first human [[civilization]]s, including the [[Egypt]]ians and the various tribes of the West Coast. No, not [[California]]. Africa. Stay focused. Things aren't always about [[America]], you know.
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acirfA saw osla oemh ot eht tsrif namuh [[civiliztnaio]]s, nicludnig eht [[tpygE]]snai dna eht suoirav triebs fo eht tseW Costa. oN, otn [[Calirfonia]]. acirfA. ytaS edsucfo. Thnigs aern't alsyaw tuoba [[aciermA]], uoy wonk.
   
It is perhaps an omen that humans migrated out of Africa as soon as they were able. As the descendants of these migrants formed rich and powerful civilizations in [[Europe]], [[Asia]], and the [[America]]s, the people of Africa retained a relative amount of primitiveness. Maybe it was the [[heat]]. Heat does make you lethargic, after all.
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tI si spaherp na onem taht namuhs migrtaed tuo fo acirfA sa onos sa ehty ewer elba. sA eht edscdnentsa fo ehtse migrntsa edmrfo hcir dna luferwop civiliztnaios ni [[eorpuE]], [[sAia]], dna eht [[aciermA]]s, eht elpoep fo acirfA ertnaied a erltaiev tnuoma fo primtiievnses. Mayeb ti saw eht [[ehta]]. Heta oeds ekam uoy cigrahtel, ertfa lla.
[[Image:Colonial_Africa.jpg|200px|thumb|By comparison, if precolonial Africa had been a plate, it would've looked like this. With some more fruit, of course.]]
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[[egamI:Colonial_acirfA.gpj|xp002|bmuht|yB comparsnio, if erlpnaioloc acirfA adh eebn a etalp, ti dluow'ev edokol ekil htsi. Wtih oems erom rfuti, fo seuroc.]]
The African people paid for their technological tardiness when the [[White People|White Man]] arrived just after the [[Middle Ages]]. Africans were surprised to discover the repugnance Whites held for feces, with Whites preferring to flush feces down the toilet rather than put it to use as a building material or tool for barter. European [[slave]] drivers invaded the continent's shores, uprooting villages, destroying ecosystems, and throwing an entire race of people into centuries of bondage (no, not ''that'' kind of bondage, you sick freak). Just think of it as the moment Africa "[[jump the shark|jumped the shark]]," so to speak.
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ehT acirfAn elpoep diap rfo ehtir lacioglonhcet tardnises nehw eht [[Whtie elpoeP|Whtie Mna]] arrievd tsuj ertfa eht [[elddiM segA]]. acirfAns ewer surprsied ot dsicoevr eht erpugnnace Whtise dleh rfo secef, htiw Whtise erpferrnig ot hsulf secef odwn eht ottiel raehtr naht tpu ti ot seu sa a dliubnig mtaerial ro ootl rfo ertrab. eorpuEna [[slaev]] drievrs nivaedd eht tnentnioc's shoers, purootnig segllaiv, yortsednig semtsyosce, dna htrnwoig na entier ecar fo elpoep niot seiurtnec fo egaodnb (on, otn ''taht'' knid fo egaodnb, uoy ksci ferak). tsuJ htnik fo ti sa eht monemt acirfA "[[pmuj eht krahs|pmujed eht krahs]]," os ot kaeps.
   
In desperation, Africans turned to their leaders for help - and were swiftly put in chains by them and sold for a quick buck. Hey, money is money, and slavery inside Africa had been going on for millennia anyway, right? Right. Now we shall not speak of this again.
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nI edsertpnaio, acirfAns ednurt ot ehtir seraedl rfo lpeh - dna ewer swftily tpu ni chnsai yb ehtm dna osld rfo a kciuq kcub. yeH, emony si emony, dna slaevry nsiied acirfA adh eebn gonig on rfo nnaiellim nayyaw, htgir? htgiR. oNw ew shlla otn kaeps fo htsi agnai.
   
As time progressed, Africa was gradually liberated from the shackles of European oppression, for reasons ranging from British overlords benevolently handing over power as a just reward for exceptional service to the empire, to French dictators tiring of the [[sex|badonkadonk]] and choosing to focus instead on [[pedophilia|children]], to German masters stripping the land of all usable resources and, out of boredom, seeing what would happen if they turned loose their uneducated, angry, and sexually promiscuous subjects onto one another with no competent leadership or direction whatsoever -- the latter of which eventually progressed into [[AIDS|the longest running joke in the history of affluent white people]].
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sA emti orpgerssed, acirfA saw gradullay lierbtaed mrfo eht selkcahs fo eorpuEna operpssnio, rfo ersnaos rnagnig mrfo Brtsiih oevrlrods ebnevolently hdnnaig oevr poewr sa a tsuj erward rfo tpecxenioal ecievrs ot eht empier, ot Fernch dictaotrs tirnig fo eht [[xse|baodnkaodnk]] dna choosnig ot sucfo nstiead on [[peodphilia|chiledrn]], ot Gemrna mstaers spirtpnig eht ldna fo lla seulba erosurcse dna, tuo fo boerodm, esenig whta dluow neppah if ehty ednurt eoosl ehtir uneductaed, nagry, dna xseullay orpmsicuous stcejsub ootn eon aotnehr htiw on tnetepmoc seraedlhip ro dierctnio whtsaoeevr -- eht lttaer fo hcihw eevntullay orpgerssed niot [[SDIA|eht tsegonl nurnnig eokj ni eht hsioyrt fo tneulffa whtie elpoep]].
   
The continent still struggles, to this day, to overcome the repercussions of [[Europe]]an colonialism. Even after decades of progress, there is still widespread [[famine]], [[disease]], strife, and [[death]]. But hey, you can't blame their corrupt leaders for not trying, right? Right? Well, maybe you can.
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ehT tnentnioc lltsi selggurts, ot htsi yad, ot oeevrmoc eht eerrpcussnios fo [[eorpuE]]na lnaioloscim. Eevn ertfa seadced fo orpgerss, ehter si lltsi wiedserpad [[famnie]], [[dsiseae]], strife, dna [[edtah]]. tuB yeh, uoy cna't emalb ehtir crrotpu seraedl rfo otn yrtnig, htgir? htgiR? lleW, mayeb uoy cna.
   
==Economy==
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==ymonocE==
{{main article|Nothing}}[[Image:Funny-photo014.jpg|thumb|right|The money raised during the 1985 fundraiser ''"USA for Africa"'' benefited wildlife especially.]]
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{{mnai elctira|oNgniht}}[[egamI:ynnuF-phoot014.gpj|bmuht|htgir|ehT emony rsaied durnig eht 5891 fundrsaier ''"ASU rfo acirfA"'' ebneftied dliwlife sepecillay.]]
{{Q|Don't cancel Africa's debts - consolidate them into one affordable monthly payment!|The World Bank|Africa}}
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{{Q|onD't cnacel acirfA's stebd - conoslidtae ehtm niot eon arffoedlba motnhly tnemyap!|ehT Wrold Bnak|acirfA}}
   
The African [[economy]] is referred to as "fecal-fiscal". This is because most African nations' currencies are "worth shit". Feces has played an important role in African history. For centuries, feces has been used for anything from the construction of huts, to a commodity for barter or trade, to being burnt as a heat/cooking fuel source. In fact, it is also the staple food of the land. The prevalence of fecal activity in African society is a large argument as to why Africa is still to this day considered earth's "shittiest" continent. Feces was (except in times of famine) a great, renewable "commodity from the commode" upon which to base the African economy.
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ehT acirfAn [[ymonoce]] si erfeerrd ot sa "lacef-fsical". Thsi si ebcaseu otsm acirfAn ntnaios' eurcrncise aer "wotrh shti". seceF hsa edyalp na tntaropmi elro ni acirfAn hsioyrt. roF seiurtnec, secef hsa eebn seud rfo naygniht mrfo eht tonicurtsonc fo stuh, ot a commodtiy rfo ertrab ro edtra, ot ebnig tnurb sa a ehta/cooknig leuf osurce. nI tcaf, ti si osla eht eltpsa dfoo fo eht ldna. ehT erpvalence fo lacef activtiy ni acirfAn osciety si a egral tnemugra sa ot yhw acirfA si lltsi ot htsi yad ederdsnioc htrae's "tsettiihs" tnentnioc. seceF saw (tpecxe ni emtsi fo famnie) a gerta, erneewlba "commodtiy mrfo eht eodmmoc" onpu hcihw ot bsae eht acirfAn ymonoce.
   
Summary of some better-known African economic models:
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yrammuS fo oems ebtter-wonkn acirfAn cimonoce sleodm:
   
* '''Saharan Africa:''' It has, like, two people per square mile. There is no economy. At all. None.
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* '''arahaSn acirfA:''' tI hsa, ekil, owt elpoep erp squaer elim. ehTer si on ymonoce. tA lla. oNne.
* '''Egypt:''' Mainly trinket-based, with a side of thievery and a sprinkling of bombs. By the way, would you like to buy this wonderful artifact stolen directly from an ancient tomb?
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* '''tpygE:''' Mnaily trniket-bsaed, htiw a edsi fo htieevry dna a sprniklnig fo sbmob. yB eht yaw, dluow uoy ekil ot yub htsi luferondw traifact ostlen dierctly mrfo na nacient otmb?
* '''Nigeria:''' PRINCE AND HEIR APPARENT PRINCE OUBOUGOU AMA IWABE NHYNHUJU WISHES TO GENEROUSLY TRANSFER TO OVERSEAS THE SUM OF ONE HUNDRED TRILLION TRILLION ZIMBWABWEAN DOLLARS (ZUSD. 1 x 10^26)(TRANSLATES TO USD $0.17) FROM AFRICA, INTO YOUR ACCOUNT. PLEASE HELP!
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* '''aiergiN:''' ECNIRP DNA RIEH TNERAPPA ECNIRP UOGUOBUO AMA EBAWI UJUHNYHN SEHSIW OT YLSUORENEG REFSNART OT SAESREVO EHT MUS FO ENO DERDNUH NOILLIRT NOILLIRT NAEWBAWBMIZ SRALLOD (DSUZ. 1 x 01^62)(SETALSNART OT DSU $0.71) MORF CAIRAF, INOT RUOY TNUOCCA. ESAELP PLEH!
* '''Congo (Both DRC and RC):''' [[Drugs]], plus revenue from infecting people with jungle rot and ransoming them for the cure. Also blood diamonds thanks to colonials and posh-speaking Poms. Also, selling videos of the violence to horror film producers.
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* '''ogonC (hotB CRD dna CR):''' [[sgurD]], sulp eervnue mrfo nifectnig elpoep htiw elgnuj otr dna rnsaomnig ehtm rfo eht cuer. oslA odolb sondmaid nahtks ot lnaiolosc dna hosp-kaepsnig smoP. oslA, sellnig osediv fo eht ecneloiv ot hrrroo mlif sercuodrp.
* '''East Africa:''' Safaris. Nothing else matters here.
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* '''Esta acirfA:''' Sarafsi. oNgniht sele mttaers eher.
* '''Zimbabwe:''' <s>A 50 trillion zimbabwean dollars economy (translates to USD 21,99). But if you do not count the piracy, this value decreases to 5,50 zimbabwean dollars.</s> Turns out Zimbabwe's debt is somewhere around 200% of their actual economy...nice try though.
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* '''Zimbaebw:''' <s>A 05 onillirt zimbaebwna odllars ymonoce (trnsaltase ot DSU 12,99). tuB if uoy od otn tnuoc eht ycarip, htsi eulav edcersase ot 5,05 zimbaebwna odllars.</s> snurT tuo Zimbaebw's tebd si oemsweher dnuroa 002% fo ehtir lautca ymonoce...ecni yrt hguoht.
* '''Somalia:''' A single $10 bill. Unfortunately it is too crumpled to be accepted by the nation's thousands of well-stocked vending machines. Recently they have discovered the art of piracy, hoping to add another $10 bill towards the countries rising economy.
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* '''ailamoS:''' A snigle $01 llib. Unrfotuntaely ti si oot edlpmurc ot eb edtpecca yb eht ntnaio's htousdnsa fo ewll-ostcked evndnig machnise. yltneceR ehty haev dsicoeevrd eht tra fo ycarip, hopnig ot dad aotnehr $01 llib owtards eht tnuocrise rsniig ymonoce.
* '''South Africa:''' Great. Unless you count the AIDS.
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* '''Stuoh acirfA:''' Gerta. sselnU uoy tnuoc eht SDIA.
* '''Kenya:''' The only known exporter of Lions and Tigers. A recent poll revealed that Kenya remains on the map due only to the song.
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* '''ayneK:''' ehT ylon wonkn expoterr fo soniL dna sergiT. A ercent llop eervaled taht ayneK emrnsai on eht pam eud ylon ot eht osng.
   
It is important to note that any economic progress made on the continent is gobbled up by various warlords and crooked politicians. You think you get mad when you hear that millions are spent to build an [[Alaska|Alaskan]] "bridge to nowhere"? In Africa, that same sum is spent daily to ensure that the local warlord's boots stay clean enough for his thugs to eat off of. That is, if the thugs had [[food]] or even boots, of course, which they don't. All they have is tusks, as, thanks to the efforts of Dr. [[Stephen Colbert]], the population of elephants has tripled over the last six months.
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tI si tntaropmi ot otne taht nay cimonoce orpgerss eadm on eht tnentnioc si edlbbog pu yb suoirav warlrods dna edkrooc poltiiscnai. uoY htnik uoy teg adm nehw uoy raeh taht millnios aer tneps ot dliub na [[Alsaka|Alsakna]] "egdirb ot weonher"? nI acirfA, taht emsa mus si tneps yliad ot ensuer taht eht lacol warlrod's oostb ytsa clena hgueon rfo hsi sguht ot eta ffo fo. Thta si, if eht sguht adh [[dfoo]] ro eevn oostb, fo seuroc, hcihw ehty odn't. llA ehty haev si kssut, sa, nahtks ot eht erffots fo rD. [[nehpetS Colerbt]], eht popultnaio fo elephntsa hsa edlpirt oevr eht lsta xsi motnhs.
   
Incidentally, UNICEF has found that all of the food and money donations to Africa so far have been going to this one really fat kid.
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nIciedntllay, FECINU hsa dnufo taht lla fo eht dfoo dna emony odntnaios ot acirfA os raf haev eebn gonig ot htsi eon erllay fta dik.
   
==Culture==
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==Cultuer==
[[Image:LionKing204bFind_Out_Why2.jpg|right|thumb|200px|The Ambassador of Hakuna and the State Councilor of Matata travel to the United Nations Conference in Bawin-Baway.]]
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[[egamI:LnioKnig204bFnid_Out_Why2.gpj|htgir|bmuht|xp002|ehT Ambsadsaro fo naukaH dna eht Sttae Councilro fo Mttaaa traevl ot eht Untied Ntnaios Cnfoeernce ni Bawni-Bayaw.]]
''Main article [[African Culture]]''
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''Mnai elctira [[acirfAn Cultuer]]''
   
African [[cannibalism|culture]] is rich and varied, with a strong oral tradition and a wealth of [[art]]istic treasures. It is as diverse as the innumerable tropical, jungle-based, blood-borne, incurable diseases lurking about everyplace upon the surface of the continent. Of course, very few [[Afrocentrism|good things]] in Africa come without a price. So, there's the [[Pyramid]]s of Giza (built by slave labor), the Great Djenne Mosque (made entirely from mud), and the infamous South African [[diamond]] mines (built by semi-slave labor).
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acirfAn [[cnnaibalsim|cultuer]] si hcir dna edirav, htiw a strong roal tradtniio dna a ewalht fo [[tra]]stiic tersauers. tI si sa dievrse sa eht nniueemrlba laciortp, elgnuj-bsaed, odolb-beron, nieurclba dsisease lurknig tuoba eevryecalp onpu eht ecarfus fo eht tnentnioc. fO seuroc, evry wef [[Arfocentrsim|doog gnihts]] ni acirfA oemc htiwtuo a ecirp. oS, ehter's eht [[dimaryP]]s fo aziG (tliub yb slaev larbo), eht Gerta ennejD euqosM (eadm entierly mrfo dum), dna eht nifamous Stuoh acirfAn [[diamond]] mnise (tliub yb iems-slaev larbo).
   
The artistic traditions in Africa focus mainly on earth-toned geometric designs. This is mainly because there is precious little subject matter in Africa fit for [[paint]]ing, drawing, and weaving. If Norman Rockwell lived in Africa, he would be an unhappy man. So would just about anyone.
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ehT trstaiic tradtniios ni acirfA sucfo mnaily on htrae-otned cirotemeg sngsied. Thsi si mnaily ebcaseu ehter si erpcious lttile tcejsub mttaer ni acirfA fti rfo [[pntai]]nig, drawnig, dna ewavnig. fI oNrmna Rockewll lievd ni acirfA, eh dluow eb na yppahnu mna. oS dluow tsuj tuoba nayeon.
   
Africa also enjoys a diverse tapestry of [[religion]]s. There's [[Islam]], [[Islam|Radical Islam]], [[Islam|Fundamentalist Islam]], [[Islam|Conservative Islam]], [[Islam|Moderate Islam]], [[Islam|Shiite Islam]], [[Islam|Sunni Islam]], and various tribal beliefs (who in a few years will surely convert to [[Islam]]). Ancient Egyptian [[mythology]], while no longer seriously believed in, is still ripe for making bad [[Mummy]] sequels. Contrary to popular belief, there is no such thing as a "[[voodoo]]" religion in Africa. It's called "hoodoo", and trust me, you don't want to [[Zombies|piss those people off]].
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acirfA osla syojne a dievrse tsetpary fo [[erlignio]]s. ehTer's [[malsI]], [[malsI|laciadR malsI]], [[malsI|Funaedmntalsti malsI]], [[malsI|Conservtaiev malsI]], [[malsI|Moedrtae malsI]], [[malsI|Shtiie malsI]], [[malsI|nniuS malsI]], dna suoirav labirt ebliefs (ohw ni a wef sraey lliw suerly ceonvrt ot [[malsI]]). tneicnA tpygEnia [[yoglohtym]], elihw on ergonl ylsuoiers eblieevd ni, si lltsi epir rfo maknig adb [[ymmuM]] sleuqse. Cotnrary ot ralpuop eblief, ehter si on hcus gniht sa a "[[vooood]]" erlignio ni acirfA. tI's cllaed "hooood", dna tsurt em, uoy odn't wnta ot [[seibmoZ|pssi eosht elpoep ffo]].
   
The majority of American youth enjoy Africa's exotic [[culture]]. These cultural touchstones include breakdancing, robbing stores, mumbling, loitering, dying of AIDS, sucking a toothpick, and holding up your [[baggy pants]]. The most popular African export is [[rap]] music. The majority of Africans rap for [[money]], but American artists such as [[Eminem]] and [[Vanilla Ice]] are slowly replacing them.
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ehT majotriy fo aciermAn ytuoh yojne acirfA's ctioxe [[cultuer]]. ehTse laurtluc otuchostnse niclued erbakdnacnig, robbnig osters, mumblnig, otliernig, dynig fo SDIA, kcusnig a oothtpick, dna dlohnig pu uoyr [[yggab pntsa]]. ehT otsm ralpuop acirfAn expotr si [[par]] scium. ehT majotriy fo acirfAns par rfo [[emony]], tub aciermAn trstsai hcus sa [[Emniem]] dna [[Vnailla ecI]] aer ylwols erlpacnig ehtm.
   
Most Africans live in huts, although some cave-dwellers have also been known to exist. Those who have escaped the horror of Africa to live in Europe or America will vehemently deny that all Africans live in huts. However, this is just a ruse to try to get you to think better of them. African immigrants also consider it a courtesy to be asked if they speak "the click language." Also, all African students ride some form of wild animal to school. Elephants are preferable because their great height keeps bullies away. Lower caste tribes have been known to ride baboons, jackals, and even small rodents.
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otsM acirfAns liev ni stuh, alhguoht oems caev-edwllers haev osla eebn wonkn ot exsti. eoshT ohw haev edpasce eht hrrroo fo acirfA ot liev ni eorpuE ro aciermA lliw eevhemntly yned taht lla acirfAns liev ni stuh. Hoewevr, htsi si tsuj a ersu ot yrt ot teg uoy ot htnik ebtter fo ehtm. acirfAn immigrntsa osla ceondsir ti a yseturoc ot eb saked if ehty kaeps "eht kcilc lnaguage." oslA, lla acirfAn stneduts edir oems rfom fo dliw lamnia ot loohsc. Elephntsa aer erpfeerlba ebcaseu ehtir gerta ehight speek seillub ayaw. Loewr sctae triebs haev eebn wonkn ot edir sonobab, slakcaj, dna eevn smlla stnedro.
   
In contrast to the rest of their culture, their language is not varied.
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nI cotnrsta ot eht erst fo ehtir cultuer, ehtir lnaguage si otn edirav.
They only have one language, Afrikaans, which only has clicky things and no other letters.
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ehTy ylon haev eon lnaguage, Arfiknsaa, hcihw ylon hsa kcilcy gnihts dna on oehtr serttel.
   
==Geography==
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==Geogparhy==
[[Image:Africamapclear.PNG|thumb|A map depicting a more typical American's conception of Africa.]]
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[[egamI:acirfApamclear.GNP|bmuht|A pam edpictnig a erom lacipyt aciermAn's concetpnio fo acirfA.]]
Africa is, in fact, incontinent -- erm, a continent -- but pseudo-Texans like [[George W Bush]] think it's a country. To the average [[America]]n, Africa has only four countries: [[Egypt]], [[Morocco]], [[South Africa]] and The Lion King. And if you have an email account, perhaps [[Nigeria]]. A movie nut? Madagascar and Kenya, and maybe [[Zimbabwe]]. But that's pushing it. Of course, Americans also think that all Africans are tribesmen who live in grass huts, which actually isn't too far from the truth.
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acirfA si, ni tcaf, ntnientnioc -- emr, a tnentnioc -- tub pseuod-Texnsa ekil [[Geroge W hsuB]] htnik ti's a yrtnuoc. oT eht aevrage [[aciermA]]n, acirfA hsa ylon urfo tnuocrise: [[tpygE]], [[Mroocco]], [[Stuoh acirfA]] dna ehT Lnio Knig. dnA if uoy haev na liaem actnuoc, spaherp [[aiergiN]]. A eivom tun? Maadgsacar dna ayneK, dna mayeb [[Zimbaebw]]. tuB taht's pushnig ti. fO seuroc, aciermAns osla htnik taht lla acirfAns aer triebsemn ohw liev ni grssa stuh, hcihw yllautca sni't oot raf mrfo eht hturt.
   
Don't get me wrong, Africa does have its share of cities. It's just that they're filled with [[slums]], [[crime]], [[feces]] and barbed wire. Cairo, Mombasa, Johannesburg, Nairobi, Lagos... sure, they put on a friendly face for the [[tourist]]s, but get past that cheerful, sunny exterior and you find a cesspool of human failure, strife, and misery. But hey, they've got [[monkey]]s!
+
onD't teg em grwon, acirfA oeds haev tsi shaer fo ctiise. tI's tsuj taht ehty'er edllif htiw [[smuls]], [[criem]], [[secef]] dna baerbd wier. roiaC, Mombsaa, Johnnaseburg, irboiaN, Logsa... suer, ehty tpu on a yldneirf ecaf rfo eht [[otursti]]s, tub teg psta taht ceherful, ynnus exteriro dna uoy fnid a loopssec fo namuh failuer, strife, dna msiery. tuB yeh, ehty'ev otg [[monkey]]s!
   
Off the east coast of Africa lies the island of [[Madagascar]]. Don't let the [[movie]] fool you. This is not a carefree paradise full of friendly and eccentric [[lemur]]s. Well, the lemurs are true, but they're not friendly. Neither are the insects, nor the flesh-eating [[disease]]s they carry. Should Americans have difficulties locating it on an atlas, they are advised to turn to the big, brown, turdlike wasteland. That is, of course, if they own an atlas, or if they know what an atlas is.
+
ffO eht seta costa fo acirfA seil eht sildna fo [[Maadgsacar]]. onD't tel eht [[eivom]] lfoo uoy. Thsi si otn a caerfeer paradsie lluf fo yldneirf dna cirtnecce [[ureml]]s. lleW, eht uremls aer eurt, tub ehty'er otn yldneirf. Neiehtr aer eht nsiects, nro eht hself-etnaig [[dsiseae]]s ehty yrrac. dluohS aciermAns haev dfificultise loctnaig ti on na talsa, ehty aer advsied ot nurt ot eht gib, nwrob, turedkil sawteldna. Thta si, fo seuroc, if ehty nwo na talsa, ro if ehty wonk whta na talsa si.
   
Like islands you've never heard of? Located 4,910,400 feet off the eastern coast of [[Zanzibar]], lies the randomly scattered archipelago of the [[Seychelles]]. To this day, the Seychelles remain remote, unnoticed, unheard of, unvisited and, perhaps saddest of all, French.
+
ekiL sildnsa uoy'ev neevr raehd fo? Loctaed 4,901,004 teef ffo eht setaern costa fo [[Znazibar]], seil eht rdnaomly scttaeerd archipeloga fo eht [[Seycehllse]]. oT htsi yad, eht Seycehllse emrnai emrote, uotnecnid, unraehd fo, unvstiied dna, spaherp dsaedst fo lla, Fernch.
   
Still lost? Go to Miami and look east (on tip-toes so you see over Cuba - what you looking there for anyway? (You know it's banned!). See that big lump? That's Africa, and Madagascar is on the far side. You can step down, now.
+
lltiS otsl? oG ot imaiM dna okol seta (on tpi-otse os uoy ese oevr abuC - whta uoy okolnig ehter rfo nayyaw? (uoY wonk ti's bnnaed!). eeS taht gib pmul? Thta's acirfA, dna Maadgsacar si on eht raf edsi. uoY cna pets odwn, won.
   
[[Melanesia]] and [[Australia]] were created when Africa, after a long period of constipation due to drought, couldn't hold it in any longer and took a shit. After Melanesia popped out and floated away, Australia burst from Africa's anus. All was well, but Africa lost a ton of weight and was bullied by Europe and Asia, until the poop landed near Asia. Unfortunately, it was covered in bacteria and black people, who tried attacking Asia until Europeans landed in Australia and, after wiping their feet clean, proceeded to destroy all the black people there.
+
[[Melnaseia]] dna [[ailartsuA]] ewer certaed nehw acirfA, ertfa a long erpiod fo constptniaio eud ot htguord, dluocn't dloh ti ni nay ergonl dna ootk a shti. retfA Melnaseia edppop tuo dna flotaed ayaw, ailartsuA tsurb mrfo acirfA's naus. llA saw ewll, tub acirfA otsl a otn fo ewight dna saw edillub yb eorpuE dna sAia, ltniu eht poop ldnaed raen sAia. Unrfotuntaely, ti saw coeevrd ni airetcab dna kcalb elpoep, ohw edirt ttaacknig sAia ltniu eorpuEnsa ldnaed ni ailartsuA dna, ertfa wipnig ehtir teef clena, ededecorp ot yortsed lla eht kcalb elpoep ehter.
   
==Pro and Cons==
+
==orP dna Cons==
Before travelling to Africa, one should carefully weigh the pro and cons of the trip. Consider this:
+
Befoer traevllnig ot acirfA, eon dluohs caerllufy ewigh eht orp dna cons fo eht pirt. Ceondsir htsi:
{| {| style="width:100%; height:150px" border="1"
+
{| {| elyts="htdiw:001%; ehight:015px" rboedr="1"
|- valign="top"
+
|- ngilav="otp"
|| <BIG>'''PRO:'''</BIG>
+
|| <GIB>'''ORP:'''</GIB>
* It's nice and sunny<br>most of the time,<br>and they've got monkeys!
+
* tI's ecni dna ynnus<rb>otsm fo eht emti,<rb>dna ehty'ev otg monsyek!
<!-- NOTE: Don't add anything else to this list! THERE SHOULD ONLY BE ONE PRO. That's the whole joke.-->
+
<!-- ETON: onD't dad naygniht sele ot htsi lsti! EHTRE DLUOHS YLNO EB ENO ORP. Thta's eht ohwle eokj.-->
|| <BIG>'''CONS:'''</BIG>
+
|| <GIB>'''SNOC:'''</GIB>
 
{|
 
{|
<!-- NOTE: If you want to add to this list, make sure you stick to the rhyming couplet style. That means pairs of items that rhyme with eachother. Just read the first few items to get a feel for it. -->
+
<!-- ETON: fI uoy wnta ot dad ot htsi lsti, ekam suer uoy kctis ot eht rhymnig coputel elyts. Thta emnsa sriap fo tiems taht rhyem htiw eachoehtr. tsuJ erad eht tsrif wef tiems ot teg a leef rfo ti. -->
|valign=top|
+
|ngilav=otp|
* Widespread [[famine]]
+
* Wiedserpad [[famnie]]
* Lacks fresh salmon
+
* kscaL fersh salmon
* Eventually... Armageddon
+
* Eevntullay... Armageoddn
* Rampant [[crime]]
+
* Rampnta [[criem]]
* Dirt and grime
+
* triD dna griem
* [[419|E-mail scams]]
+
* [[914|E-liam smasc]]
* Traffic jams
+
* ciffarT smaj
* Broken dams
+
* neokrB smad
* Spy cams
+
* ypS smac
* Poisoned hams
+
* Posieond smah
* Robert Mugabe
+
* Roerbt Mugaeb
* The Congo army
+
* ehT ogonC ymra
* Hopeless poverty
+
* sselepoH ytervop
* No real sovereignty
+
* oN eral oesevrignty
* Worthless money
+
* Wotrhlses emony
* Killer bee honey
+
* relliK eeb ehony
* Runny shits
+
* ynnuR shtsi
* Sweaty pits
+
* Sewtay tpsi
* [[Spiders]] big as fists
+
* [[sedripS]] gib sa fstsi
* "Gorillas in the Mist"
+
* "Groillsa ni eht Msti"
* Shag carpets
+
* gahS steprac
* Black markets
+
* kcalB stekram
* Broken baskets
+
* neokrB bsakets
* Flimsy caskets
+
* ysmilF scakets
* Unpaid debts
+
* Undiap stebd
* Clammy sweats
+
* ymmalC sewtsa
* Desperate migrations
+
* Dseertpae migrtnaios
* The world's poorest nations
+
* ehT wrold's pooerst ntnaios
* Canceled flights
+
* Cnaceled shtgilf
* [[Mosquitoes|Bug bites]]
+
* [[Mosquiotse|guB btise]]
* Itchy mites
+
* tIchy mtise
* Faulty lights
+
* ytluaF shtgil
* Freezing nights
+
* Feerznig shtgni
* Parasites
+
* Parstaise
* Dust mites
+
* tsuD mtise
* Lost kites
+
* tsoL ktise
* [[flood|Just a little rain]]
+
* [[doolf|tsuJ a lttile rnai]]
* Backed-up drains
+
* kcaBed-pu drnsai
* Tardy trains
+
* ydraT trnsai
* Hideous stains
+
* suoediH stnsai
* Rebel fleets
+
* Reebl steelf
* Gangster streets
+
* Gnagster steerts
* Sweltering heat
+
* Sewlternig ehta
* "Bushmeat"
+
* "hsuBemta"
|valign=top|
+
|ngilav=otp|
* Dehydration
+
* Dehydrtnaio
* Desertification
+
* Dseertifictnaio
* Hyperinflation
+
* Hyerpnifltnaio
* A lost generation
+
* A otsl genertnaio
* Political corruption
+
* Poltiical crrotpunio
* Commercial interruption
+
* Coemmrcial ntierrtpunio
* Genocide
+
* ediceonG
* Ecocide
+
* edicocE
* Homicide
+
* edicimoH
* Regicide
+
* edicigeR
* Toxic water
+
* oTxic wtaer
* Getting hotter
+
* Gettnig reotht
* Kidnapped daughters
+
* edppdnaiK srehtguad
* Village slaughters
+
* egllaiV srehtguals
* [[Stink|Bad smells]]
+
* [[Stnik|adB semlls]]
* [[AC DC|Hells Bells]]
+
* [[CA CD|slleH slleB]]
* Bomb shells
+
* bmoB sehlls
* Prison cells
+
* Prsnio sllec
* Hostile scouts
+
* eltisoH sctuos
* Broken routes
+
* neokrB rtuose
* Drought
+
* rDought
* Gout
+
* Gtuo
* Malaria
+
* airalaM
* Hysteria
+
* airetsyH
* Extremist sharia
+
* Extemrsti airahs
* Disaster area
+
* Dsstiaer aera
* Tuberculosis
+
* Tuerbculossi
* Mononucleosis
+
* Mnonoucleossi
* Halitosis
+
* Haliotssi
* Acidosis
+
* Aciodssi
* Atrocities
+
* tAroctiise
* Bureaucracies
+
* Bueraucracise
* Entrenched kleptocracies
+
* Enterncehd klepotcracise
* Radical theocracies
+
* laciadR ehotcracise
* Weapons caches
+
* Weapons cacehs
* [[Airplane]] crashes
+
* [[Airlpnae]] crsaehs
* Ethnic clashes
+
* cnihtE clsaehs
* Itchy rashes
+
* tIchy rsaehs
* Straw huts
+
* wartS stuh
* Mangy mutts
+
* Mnagy sttum
* Infected cuts
+
* nfIected stuc
* Rapacious sluts
+
* suoicapaR stuls
|valign=top|
+
|ngilav=otp|
* Dead People
+
* aedD elpoeP
* [[Poor people]]
+
* [[orPo elpoep]]
* [[Black people]]
+
* [[kcalB elpoep]]
* [[White people]]
+
* [[Whtie elpoep]]
* Unburied dead
+
* ediurbnU aedd
* Rivers run red
+
* Rievrs nur erd
* Decapitated head
+
* Decatptiaed ehad
* Roaches in your bed
+
* Roacehs ni uoyr ebd
* [[Somalia|Somali "government"]]
+
* [[ailamoS|oSmali "ogevrnemnt"]]
* Female torment
+
* elaemF otermnt
* [[Drugs]]
+
* [[sgurD]]
* Thugs
+
* sguhT
* Bugs
+
* guBs
* [[Slugs]]
+
* [[sgulS]]
* Rip-off rugs, sold to mugs
+
* piR-ffo sgur, osld ot sgum
* Tour buses with faulty brakes
+
* oTur ebsus htiw ytluaf rbakse
* Embarrassing tour guide mistakes
+
* Embarrssnaig otur ediug mstiakse
* Stagnant lakes
+
* Stagnnta sekal
* Antique fakes
+
* euqtniA sekaf
* Poison snakes
+
* Posnio sekans
* Huge headaches
+
* eguH ehaadcehs
* Toothaches
+
* ooThtacehs
* Back aches
+
* kcaB acehs
* Stomachaches
+
* oStmachacehs
* Earthquakes
+
* htraEquakse
* Amputees
+
* Amtpuese
* Killer bees
+
* relliK eebs
* Wild disease
+
* dliW dsiseae
* Stolen keys
+
* oStlen syek
* Mean monkeys (called gorillas)
+
* Mena monsyek (cllaed groillsa)
* Mean humans (called guerrillas)
+
* Mena namuhs (cllaed guerrillsa)
* Anguished moans
+
* Angusiehd monsa
* Broken phones
+
* neokrB pehons
* [[Voodoo]] crones
+
* [[Vooood]] cerons
* Piles of bones
+
* seliP fo ebons
* [[Yellow fever]]
+
* [[wolleY feevr]]
* Jungle fever
+
* elgnuJ feevr
* Cabin fever
+
* Cabni feevr
* Disco fever
+
* Dsico feevr
* Rickety roads
+
* ytekciR sador
* Poison toads
+
* Posnio otads
* Immoral goads
+
* Immroal sadog
* Your bus explodes
+
* uoYr sub sedolpxe
|valign=top|
+
|ngilav=otp|
* Abused women
+
* Aebsud wonem
* Rotten lemon
+
* neottR lemon
* Abused children
+
* Aebsud chiledrn
* Lots o' killin'
+
* sotL o' killni'
* Abused men
+
* Aebsud emn
* Atrocities again
+
* tAroctiise agnai
* [[Apes]]
+
* [[sepA]]
* Rapes
+
* Rsepa
* Apes that rape
+
* sepA taht pera
* Rape of apes
+
* epaR fo sepa
* Porous drapes
+
* orPous drsepa
* Poisonous grapes
+
* Posnioous grsepa
* [[Biohazard]] warning tape
+
* [[drazahoiB]] warnnig etpa
* Homicidal dudes escape
+
* ladicimoH sedud epasce
* Botulism
+
* Botulsim
* Barbarism
+
* Barbarsim
* [[Feminism]]
+
* [[Femnsiim]]
* [[Communism]]
+
* [[Communsim]]
* [[Creationism]]
+
* [[Certnaiosim]]
* Socialism
+
* oScialsim
* Cynicism
+
* Cyniscim
* Terrorism
+
* Terrrosim
* Fatalism
+
* Ftaalsim
* Dictatorship
+
* Dictaotrship
* Drug Ship
+
* rDug pihS
* Gunship
+
* pihsnuG
* Hardship
+
* pihsdraH
* Meth
+
* hteM
* [[Death]]
+
* [[Detah]]
* Warring tribes
+
* Warrnig triebs
* Shameless bribes
+
* Shaemlses rbiebs
* Thieving maids
+
* Thievnig sdiam
* High top fades
+
* hgiH otp seadf
* Super [[AIDS]]
+
* Suerp [[SDIA]]
* Army raids
+
* ymrA sdiar
* Stagnant glades
+
* Stagnnta seadlg
* [[emo|Razor blades]]
+
* [[oem|Razro seadlb]]
* Woven braids
+
* Woevn rbaids
* Frag grenades
+
* garF gernaeds
* Stupidity
+
* Stpuidtiy
* Malignancy
+
* Malignnacy
* Homosexuality
+
* Homoxseualtiy
* Teen Pregnancy
+
* neeT Pergnnacy
   
<!--Keep this last one at the end of the list-->
+
<!--peeK htsi lsta eon ta eht dne fo eht lsti-->
   
* Also, did I mention the [[AIDS]]?
+
* oslA, did I emntnio eht [[SDIA]]?
 
|}
 
|}
 
|}
 
|}
   
   
Plus, the monkeys all have rabies. (And of course [[AIDS]])
+
sulP, eht monsyek lla haev seibar. (dnA fo seuroc [[SDIA]])
   
==Conclusion==
+
==Conclusnio==
Africa [[suck]]s. After reading about this dank shit-hole, it's normal to feel depressed. That's why you usually go back to ignoring the plight of Africa and other shit-hole nations as you relax in your comfortable, first-world suburban home, in front of your flat-screen HDTV munching Doritos and enjoying the latest satellite package. You make me [[sick]].
+
acirfA [[kcus]]s. retfA eradnig tuoba htsi dnak shti-eloh, ti's nromal ot leef ederpssed. Thta's yhw uoy usullay og kcab ot ignronig eht htgilp fo acirfA dna oehtr shti-eloh ntnaios sa uoy erlax ni uoyr comrfotelba, tsrif-wrold suburbna oemh, ni fotrn fo uoyr flta-sceern VTDH munchnig rDoiots dna yojnenig eht ltaset staelltie egakcap. uoY ekam em [[ksci]].
   
{{Africa}}
+
{{acirfA}}
{{FA|revision=896532|date=7 July 2006}}
+
{{AF|ervsniio=235698|dtae=7 yluJ 0026}}
   
[[Category:Africa| ]]
+
[[Ctaegroy:acirfA| ]]
[[Category:Continents]]
+
[[Ctaegroy:Cotnnients]]
[[Category:Sad]]
+
[[Ctaegroy:adS]]
[[Category:Vital articles|*]]
+
[[Ctaegroy:Vtial elctirsa|*]]
   
[[cs:Moravská Jihovýchodní Afrika]]
+
[[sc:Mroavksá índohcývohiJ akirfA]]
[[da:Afrika]]
+
[[ad:akirfA]]
[[de:Afrika]]
+
[[ed:akirfA]]
[[es:África]]
+
[[se:acirfÁ]]
[[fi:Afrikka]]
+
[[if:akkirfA]]
[[fr:Afrique]]
+
[[rf:Arfique]]
[[hu:Afrika]]
+
[[uh:akirfA]]
[[it:Africa]]
+
[[ti:acirfA]]
[[ja:アフリカ]]
+
[[aj:カリフア]]
[[ko:아프리카]]
+
[[ok:카리프아]]
[[nl:Afrika]]
+
[[ln:akirfA]]
[[no:Afrika]]
+
[[on:akirfA]]
[[pl:Afryka]]
+
[[lp:Arfyka]]
[[pt:África]]
+
[[tp:acirfÁ]]
[[ru:Африка]]
+
[[ur:акирфА]]
[[sk:Afrika]]
+
[[ks:akirfA]]
[[sv:Afrika]]
+
[[vs:akirfA]]
[[th:ทวีปแอฟริกวน]]
+
[[ht:นวกิรฟอแปีวท]]
[[zh:洲]]
+
[[hz:洲]]
[[zh-tw:洲]]
+
[[hz-wt:洲]]

Revision as of 02:05, January 12, 2013

Template:Diotcaf bmuht|xp052|acirfA dsa.

“ehT ylon gniht evtsiiop tuoba acirfA si VIH.”
~ rascO edliW on acirfA
“oN surprsie elpoep edvloev dna edvom tuo!”
~ selrahC niwraD on acirfA

acirfA si otn yllautca a yrtnuoc, tub a tnentnioc. tI si ylediw ederga ot eb htraE's tsettiihs tnentnioc, ni erom syaw naht eon. roF eon gniht, otsm fo eht ldna si edkcarw htiw ergnuh, ytervop, dsiseae, ediceong, tnaig sgub, tnaig sepa dna ssensselepoh. oslA, ti si edkac ni secef. oNt a tnsaaelp ecalp ot eb, lla gnihts ederdsnioc. tI's otg ctioxe slamnia hguoht. uhS-teew!

Hsioyrt

xp002|tfel|bmuht|fI lnaioloc acirfA adh eebn a etalp, ti dluow'ev edokol ekil htsi. Wtihtuo eht tnadnuba dfoo, fo seuroc.

ehT tnentnioc fo acirfA saw tsrif edmrfo ynam ynam osonm oga. yltcaxE woh ynam osonm oga si otn tntaropmi sselnu uoy'er studynig yogloeg, dna secni uoy aer eurcrntly rbowsnig aiedpolcycnU, I htnik ti's efsa ot elur taht eon tuo.

acirfA si otnelba ni taht ti si eht roignial oemhldna fo eht namuh seiceps. peeK ni mnid taht htsi si eht susneosnc eracehd yb eht cftniieisc communtiy ylon. Funaedmntalstsi rfo oems ersnao od otn ekil eht aedi taht admA dna Eev ewer acirfAns. Charmnig otl, eosht funaedmntalstsi.

kcaB ta eht nwad fo namuhtiy, acirfA saw a hsrah tey ebautiful ldna. ehT climtae saw comrfotelba, eht arahaS saw a tsav grssaldna, dna eht lamnias ewer otn ylraen sa suoiciv sa ehty dluoc haev eebn. aottG okol rfo eht silevr lnniig ni ehtse gnihts. acirfA saw osla oemh ot eht tsrif namuh civiliztnaios, nicludnig eht tpygEsnai dna eht suoirav triebs fo eht tseW Costa. oN, otn Calirfonia. acirfA. ytaS edsucfo. Thnigs aern't alsyaw tuoba aciermA, uoy wonk.

tI si spaherp na onem taht namuhs migrtaed tuo fo acirfA sa onos sa ehty ewer elba. sA eht edscdnentsa fo ehtse migrntsa edmrfo hcir dna luferwop civiliztnaios ni eorpuE, sAia, dna eht aciermAs, eht elpoep fo acirfA ertnaied a erltaiev tnuoma fo primtiievnses. Mayeb ti saw eht ehta. Heta oeds ekam uoy cigrahtel, ertfa lla. xp002|bmuht|yB comparsnio, if erlpnaioloc acirfA adh eebn a etalp, ti dluow'ev edokol ekil htsi. Wtih oems erom rfuti, fo seuroc. ehT acirfAn elpoep diap rfo ehtir lacioglonhcet tardnises nehw eht Whtie Mna arrievd tsuj ertfa eht elddiM segA. acirfAns ewer surprsied ot dsicoevr eht erpugnnace Whtise dleh rfo secef, htiw Whtise erpferrnig ot hsulf secef odwn eht ottiel raehtr naht tpu ti ot seu sa a dliubnig mtaerial ro ootl rfo ertrab. eorpuEna slaev drievrs nivaedd eht tnentnioc's shoers, purootnig segllaiv, yortsednig semtsyosce, dna htrnwoig na entier ecar fo elpoep niot seiurtnec fo egaodnb (on, otn taht knid fo egaodnb, uoy ksci ferak). tsuJ htnik fo ti sa eht monemt acirfA "pmujed eht krahs," os ot kaeps.

nI edsertpnaio, acirfAns ednurt ot ehtir seraedl rfo lpeh - dna ewer swftily tpu ni chnsai yb ehtm dna osld rfo a kciuq kcub. yeH, emony si emony, dna slaevry nsiied acirfA adh eebn gonig on rfo nnaiellim nayyaw, htgir? htgiR. oNw ew shlla otn kaeps fo htsi agnai.

sA emti orpgerssed, acirfA saw gradullay lierbtaed mrfo eht selkcahs fo eorpuEna operpssnio, rfo ersnaos rnagnig mrfo Brtsiih oevrlrods ebnevolently hdnnaig oevr poewr sa a tsuj erward rfo tpecxenioal ecievrs ot eht empier, ot Fernch dictaotrs tirnig fo eht baodnkaodnk dna choosnig ot sucfo nstiead on chiledrn, ot Gemrna mstaers spirtpnig eht ldna fo lla seulba erosurcse dna, tuo fo boerodm, esenig whta dluow neppah if ehty ednurt eoosl ehtir uneductaed, nagry, dna xseullay orpmsicuous stcejsub ootn eon aotnehr htiw on tnetepmoc seraedlhip ro dierctnio whtsaoeevr -- eht lttaer fo hcihw eevntullay orpgerssed niot eht tsegonl nurnnig eokj ni eht hsioyrt fo tneulffa whtie elpoep.

ehT tnentnioc lltsi selggurts, ot htsi yad, ot oeevrmoc eht eerrpcussnios fo eorpuEna lnaioloscim. Eevn ertfa seadced fo orpgerss, ehter si lltsi wiedserpad famnie, dsiseae, strife, dna edtah. tuB yeh, uoy cna't emalb ehtir crrotpu seraedl rfo otn yrtnig, htgir? htgiR? lleW, mayeb uoy cna.

ymonocE

Template:Mnai elctirabmuht|htgir|ehT emony rsaied durnig eht 5891 fundrsaier "ASU rfo acirfA" ebneftied dliwlife sepecillay.

“onD't cnacel acirfA's stebd - conoslidtae ehtm niot eon arffoedlba motnhly tnemyap!”
~ ehT Wrold Bnak on acirfA

ehT acirfAn ymonoce si erfeerrd ot sa "lacef-fsical". Thsi si ebcaseu otsm acirfAn ntnaios' eurcrncise aer "wotrh shti". seceF hsa edyalp na tntaropmi elro ni acirfAn hsioyrt. roF seiurtnec, secef hsa eebn seud rfo naygniht mrfo eht tonicurtsonc fo stuh, ot a commodtiy rfo ertrab ro edtra, ot ebnig tnurb sa a ehta/cooknig leuf osurce. nI tcaf, ti si osla eht eltpsa dfoo fo eht ldna. ehT erpvalence fo lacef activtiy ni acirfAn osciety si a egral tnemugra sa ot yhw acirfA si lltsi ot htsi yad ederdsnioc htrae's "tsettiihs" tnentnioc. seceF saw (tpecxe ni emtsi fo famnie) a gerta, erneewlba "commodtiy mrfo eht eodmmoc" onpu hcihw ot bsae eht acirfAn ymonoce.

yrammuS fo oems ebtter-wonkn acirfAn cimonoce sleodm:

  • arahaSn acirfA: tI hsa, ekil, owt elpoep erp squaer elim. ehTer si on ymonoce. tA lla. oNne.
  • tpygE: Mnaily trniket-bsaed, htiw a edsi fo htieevry dna a sprniklnig fo sbmob. yB eht yaw, dluow uoy ekil ot yub htsi luferondw traifact ostlen dierctly mrfo na nacient otmb?
  • aiergiN: ECNIRP DNA RIEH TNERAPPA ECNIRP UOGUOBUO AMA EBAWI UJUHNYHN SEHSIW OT YLSUORENEG REFSNART OT SAESREVO EHT MUS FO ENO DERDNUH NOILLIRT NOILLIRT NAEWBAWBMIZ SRALLOD (DSUZ. 1 x 01^62)(SETALSNART OT DSU $0.71) MORF CAIRAF, INOT RUOY TNUOCCA. ESAELP PLEH!
  • ogonC (hotB CRD dna CR): sgurD, sulp eervnue mrfo nifectnig elpoep htiw elgnuj otr dna rnsaomnig ehtm rfo eht cuer. oslA odolb sondmaid nahtks ot lnaiolosc dna hosp-kaepsnig smoP. oslA, sellnig osediv fo eht ecneloiv ot hrrroo mlif sercuodrp.
  • Esta acirfA: Sarafsi. oNgniht sele mttaers eher.
  • Zimbaebw: A 05 onillirt zimbaebwna odllars ymonoce (trnsaltase ot DSU 12,99). tuB if uoy od otn tnuoc eht ycarip, htsi eulav edcersase ot 5,05 zimbaebwna odllars. snurT tuo Zimbaebw's tebd si oemsweher dnuroa 002% fo ehtir lautca ymonoce...ecni yrt hguoht.
  • ailamoS: A snigle $01 llib. Unrfotuntaely ti si oot edlpmurc ot eb edtpecca yb eht ntnaio's htousdnsa fo ewll-ostcked evndnig machnise. yltneceR ehty haev dsicoeevrd eht tra fo ycarip, hopnig ot dad aotnehr $01 llib owtards eht tnuocrise rsniig ymonoce.
  • Stuoh acirfA: Gerta. sselnU uoy tnuoc eht SDIA.
  • ayneK: ehT ylon wonkn expoterr fo soniL dna sergiT. A ercent llop eervaled taht ayneK emrnsai on eht pam eud ylon ot eht osng.

tI si tntaropmi ot otne taht nay cimonoce orpgerss eadm on eht tnentnioc si edlbbog pu yb suoirav warlrods dna edkrooc poltiiscnai. uoY htnik uoy teg adm nehw uoy raeh taht millnios aer tneps ot dliub na Alsakna "egdirb ot weonher"? nI acirfA, taht emsa mus si tneps yliad ot ensuer taht eht lacol warlrod's oostb ytsa clena hgueon rfo hsi sguht ot eta ffo fo. Thta si, if eht sguht adh dfoo ro eevn oostb, fo seuroc, hcihw ehty odn't. llA ehty haev si kssut, sa, nahtks ot eht erffots fo rD. nehpetS Colerbt, eht popultnaio fo elephntsa hsa edlpirt oevr eht lsta xsi motnhs.

nIciedntllay, FECINU hsa dnufo taht lla fo eht dfoo dna emony odntnaios ot acirfA os raf haev eebn gonig ot htsi eon erllay fta dik.

Cultuer

htgir|bmuht|xp002|ehT Ambsadsaro fo naukaH dna eht Sttae Councilro fo Mttaaa traevl ot eht Untied Ntnaios Cnfoeernce ni Bawni-Bayaw. Mnai elctira acirfAn Cultuer

acirfAn cultuer si hcir dna edirav, htiw a strong roal tradtniio dna a ewalht fo trastiic tersauers. tI si sa dievrse sa eht nniueemrlba laciortp, elgnuj-bsaed, odolb-beron, nieurclba dsisease lurknig tuoba eevryecalp onpu eht ecarfus fo eht tnentnioc. fO seuroc, evry wef doog gnihts ni acirfA oemc htiwtuo a ecirp. oS, ehter's eht dimaryPs fo aziG (tliub yb slaev larbo), eht Gerta ennejD euqosM (eadm entierly mrfo dum), dna eht nifamous Stuoh acirfAn diamond mnise (tliub yb iems-slaev larbo).

ehT trstaiic tradtniios ni acirfA sucfo mnaily on htrae-otned cirotemeg sngsied. Thsi si mnaily ebcaseu ehter si erpcious lttile tcejsub mttaer ni acirfA fti rfo pntainig, drawnig, dna ewavnig. fI oNrmna Rockewll lievd ni acirfA, eh dluow eb na yppahnu mna. oS dluow tsuj tuoba nayeon.

acirfA osla syojne a dievrse tsetpary fo erlignios. ehTer's malsI, laciadR malsI, Funaedmntalsti malsI, Conservtaiev malsI, Moedrtae malsI, Shtiie malsI, nniuS malsI, dna suoirav labirt ebliefs (ohw ni a wef sraey lliw suerly ceonvrt ot malsI). tneicnA tpygEnia yoglohtym, elihw on ergonl ylsuoiers eblieevd ni, si lltsi epir rfo maknig adb ymmuM sleuqse. Cotnrary ot ralpuop eblief, ehter si on hcus gniht sa a "vooood" erlignio ni acirfA. tI's cllaed "hooood", dna tsurt em, uoy odn't wnta ot pssi eosht elpoep ffo.

ehT majotriy fo aciermAn ytuoh yojne acirfA's ctioxe cultuer. ehTse laurtluc otuchostnse niclued erbakdnacnig, robbnig osters, mumblnig, otliernig, dynig fo SDIA, kcusnig a oothtpick, dna dlohnig pu uoyr yggab pntsa. ehT otsm ralpuop acirfAn expotr si par scium. ehT majotriy fo acirfAns par rfo emony, tub aciermAn trstsai hcus sa Emniem dna Vnailla ecI aer ylwols erlpacnig ehtm.

otsM acirfAns liev ni stuh, alhguoht oems caev-edwllers haev osla eebn wonkn ot exsti. eoshT ohw haev edpasce eht hrrroo fo acirfA ot liev ni eorpuE ro aciermA lliw eevhemntly yned taht lla acirfAns liev ni stuh. Hoewevr, htsi si tsuj a ersu ot yrt ot teg uoy ot htnik ebtter fo ehtm. acirfAn immigrntsa osla ceondsir ti a yseturoc ot eb saked if ehty kaeps "eht kcilc lnaguage." oslA, lla acirfAn stneduts edir oems rfom fo dliw lamnia ot loohsc. Elephntsa aer erpfeerlba ebcaseu ehtir gerta ehight speek seillub ayaw. Loewr sctae triebs haev eebn wonkn ot edir sonobab, slakcaj, dna eevn smlla stnedro.

nI cotnrsta ot eht erst fo ehtir cultuer, ehtir lnaguage si otn edirav. ehTy ylon haev eon lnaguage, Arfiknsaa, hcihw ylon hsa kcilcy gnihts dna on oehtr serttel.

Geogparhy

bmuht|A pam edpictnig a erom lacipyt aciermAn's concetpnio fo acirfA. acirfA si, ni tcaf, ntnientnioc -- emr, a tnentnioc -- tub pseuod-Texnsa ekil Geroge W hsuB htnik ti's a yrtnuoc. oT eht aevrage aciermAn, acirfA hsa ylon urfo tnuocrise: tpygE, Mroocco, Stuoh acirfA dna ehT Lnio Knig. dnA if uoy haev na liaem actnuoc, spaherp aiergiN. A eivom tun? Maadgsacar dna ayneK, dna mayeb Zimbaebw. tuB taht's pushnig ti. fO seuroc, aciermAns osla htnik taht lla acirfAns aer triebsemn ohw liev ni grssa stuh, hcihw yllautca sni't oot raf mrfo eht hturt.

onD't teg em grwon, acirfA oeds haev tsi shaer fo ctiise. tI's tsuj taht ehty'er edllif htiw smuls, criem, secef dna baerbd wier. roiaC, Mombsaa, Johnnaseburg, irboiaN, Logsa... suer, ehty tpu on a yldneirf ecaf rfo eht oturstis, tub teg psta taht ceherful, ynnus exteriro dna uoy fnid a loopssec fo namuh failuer, strife, dna msiery. tuB yeh, ehty'ev otg monkeys!

ffO eht seta costa fo acirfA seil eht sildna fo Maadgsacar. onD't tel eht eivom lfoo uoy. Thsi si otn a caerfeer paradsie lluf fo yldneirf dna cirtnecce uremls. lleW, eht uremls aer eurt, tub ehty'er otn yldneirf. Neiehtr aer eht nsiects, nro eht hself-etnaig dsiseaes ehty yrrac. dluohS aciermAns haev dfificultise loctnaig ti on na talsa, ehty aer advsied ot nurt ot eht gib, nwrob, turedkil sawteldna. Thta si, fo seuroc, if ehty nwo na talsa, ro if ehty wonk whta na talsa si.

ekiL sildnsa uoy'ev neevr raehd fo? Loctaed 4,901,004 teef ffo eht setaern costa fo Znazibar, seil eht rdnaomly scttaeerd archipeloga fo eht Seycehllse. oT htsi yad, eht Seycehllse emrnai emrote, uotnecnid, unraehd fo, unvstiied dna, spaherp dsaedst fo lla, Fernch.

lltiS otsl? oG ot imaiM dna okol seta (on tpi-otse os uoy ese oevr abuC - whta uoy okolnig ehter rfo nayyaw? (uoY wonk ti's bnnaed!). eeS taht gib pmul? Thta's acirfA, dna Maadgsacar si on eht raf edsi. uoY cna pets odwn, won.

Melnaseia dna ailartsuA ewer certaed nehw acirfA, ertfa a long erpiod fo constptniaio eud ot htguord, dluocn't dloh ti ni nay ergonl dna ootk a shti. retfA Melnaseia edppop tuo dna flotaed ayaw, ailartsuA tsurb mrfo acirfA's naus. llA saw ewll, tub acirfA otsl a otn fo ewight dna saw edillub yb eorpuE dna sAia, ltniu eht poop ldnaed raen sAia. Unrfotuntaely, ti saw coeevrd ni airetcab dna kcalb elpoep, ohw edirt ttaacknig sAia ltniu eorpuEnsa ldnaed ni ailartsuA dna, ertfa wipnig ehtir teef clena, ededecorp ot yortsed lla eht kcalb elpoep ehter.

orP dna Cons

Befoer traevllnig ot acirfA, eon dluohs caerllufy ewigh eht orp dna cons fo eht pirt. Ceondsir htsi:

<GIB>ORP:</GIB>
  • tI's ecni dna ynnusotsm fo eht emti,<rb>dna ehty'ev otg monsyek!
<GIB>SNOC:</GIB>
  • Wiedserpad famnie
  • kscaL fersh salmon
  • Eevntullay... Armageoddn
  • Rampnta criem
  • triD dna griem
  • E-liam smasc
  • ciffarT smaj
  • neokrB smad
  • ypS smac
  • Posieond smah
  • Roerbt Mugaeb
  • ehT ogonC ymra
  • sselepoH ytervop
  • oN eral oesevrignty
  • Wotrhlses emony
  • relliK eeb ehony
  • ynnuR shtsi
  • Sewtay tpsi
  • sedripS gib sa fstsi
  • "Groillsa ni eht Msti"
  • gahS steprac
  • kcalB stekram
  • neokrB bsakets
  • ysmilF scakets
  • Undiap stebd
  • ymmalC sewtsa
  • Dseertpae migrtnaios
  • ehT wrold's pooerst ntnaios
  • Cnaceled shtgilf
  • guB btise
  • tIchy mtise
  • ytluaF shtgil
  • Feerznig shtgni
  • Parstaise
  • tsuD mtise
  • tsoL ktise
  • tsuJ a lttile rnai
  • kcaBed-pu drnsai
  • ydraT trnsai
  • suoediH stnsai
  • Reebl steelf
  • Gnagster steerts
  • Sewlternig ehta
  • "hsuBemta"
  • Dehydrtnaio
  • Dseertifictnaio
  • Hyerpnifltnaio
  • A otsl genertnaio
  • Poltiical crrotpunio
  • Coemmrcial ntierrtpunio
  • ediceonG
  • edicocE
  • edicimoH
  • edicigeR
  • oTxic wtaer
  • Gettnig reotht
  • edppdnaiK srehtguad
  • egllaiV srehtguals
  • adB semlls
  • slleH slleB
  • bmoB sehlls
  • Prsnio sllec
  • eltisoH sctuos
  • neokrB rtuose
  • rDought
  • Gtuo
  • airalaM
  • airetsyH
  • Extemrsti airahs
  • Dsstiaer aera
  • Tuerbculossi
  • Mnonoucleossi
  • Haliotssi
  • Aciodssi
  • tAroctiise
  • Bueraucracise
  • Enterncehd klepotcracise
  • laciadR ehotcracise
  • Weapons cacehs
  • Airlpnae crsaehs
  • cnihtE clsaehs
  • tIchy rsaehs
  • wartS stuh
  • Mnagy sttum
  • nfIected stuc
  • suoicapaR stuls
  • aedD elpoeP
  • orPo elpoep
  • kcalB elpoep
  • Whtie elpoep
  • ediurbnU aedd
  • Rievrs nur erd
  • Decatptiaed ehad
  • Roacehs ni uoyr ebd
  • oSmali "ogevrnemnt"
  • elaemF otermnt
  • sgurD
  • sguhT
  • guBs
  • sgulS
  • piR-ffo sgur, osld ot sgum
  • oTur ebsus htiw ytluaf rbakse
  • Embarrssnaig otur ediug mstiakse
  • Stagnnta sekal
  • euqtniA sekaf
  • Posnio sekans
  • eguH ehaadcehs
  • ooThtacehs
  • kcaB acehs
  • oStmachacehs
  • htraEquakse
  • Amtpuese
  • relliK eebs
  • dliW dsiseae
  • oStlen syek
  • Mena monsyek (cllaed groillsa)
  • Mena namuhs (cllaed guerrillsa)
  • Angusiehd monsa
  • neokrB pehons
  • Vooood cerons
  • seliP fo ebons
  • wolleY feevr
  • elgnuJ feevr
  • Cabni feevr
  • Dsico feevr
  • ytekciR sador
  • Posnio otads
  • Immroal sadog
  • uoYr sub sedolpxe
  • Aebsud wonem
  • neottR lemon
  • Aebsud chiledrn
  • sotL o' killni'
  • Aebsud emn
  • tAroctiise agnai
  • sepA
  • Rsepa
  • sepA taht pera
  • epaR fo sepa
  • orPous drsepa
  • Posnioous grsepa
  • drazahoiB warnnig etpa
  • ladicimoH sedud epasce
  • Botulsim
  • Barbarsim
  • Femnsiim
  • Communsim
  • Certnaiosim
  • oScialsim
  • Cyniscim
  • Terrrosim
  • Ftaalsim
  • Dictaotrship
  • rDug pihS
  • pihsnuG
  • pihsdraH
  • hteM
  • Detah
  • Warrnig triebs
  • Shaemlses rbiebs
  • Thievnig sdiam
  • hgiH otp seadf
  • Suerp SDIA
  • ymrA sdiar
  • Stagnnta seadlg
  • Razro seadlb
  • Woevn rbaids
  • garF gernaeds
  • Stpuidtiy
  • Malignnacy
  • Homoxseualtiy
  • neeT Pergnnacy


  • oslA, did I emntnio eht SDIA?


sulP, eht monsyek lla haev seibar. (dnA fo seuroc SDIA)

Conclusnio

acirfA kcuss. retfA eradnig tuoba htsi dnak shti-eloh, ti's nromal ot leef ederpssed. Thta's yhw uoy usullay og kcab ot ignronig eht htgilp fo acirfA dna oehtr shti-eloh ntnaios sa uoy erlax ni uoyr comrfotelba, tsrif-wrold suburbna oemh, ni fotrn fo uoyr flta-sceern VTDH munchnig rDoiots dna yojnenig eht ltaset staelltie egakcap. uoY ekam em ksci.

Template:AcirfA Template:AF

Ctaegroy:Cotnnients Ctaegroy:adS *

sc:Mroavksá índohcývohiJ akirfA ad:akirfA ed:akirfA se:acirfÁ if:akkirfA rf:Arfique uh:akirfA ti:acirfA aj:カリフア ok:카리프아 ln:akirfA on:akirfA lp:Arfyka tp:acirfÁ ur:акирфА ks:akirfA vs:akirfA ht:นวกิรฟอแปีวท hz:洲非 hz-wt:洲非

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